Techniques to Stay Cool/Calm on the Sideline

[Anonymous]

This may seem ridiculous, but if the sideline is an unusually difficult place for you, maybe try this routine:

As soon as you wake up on game day, say a prayer or the secular equivalent to whatever authority feels powerful to you, whether it’s Mother Nature or God or the universe. In the prayer, you simply say that you turn everything over to the Father of Light for this day. You are placing all of your cares and worries and fears into his hands, and you are giving up control.

Prior to the game, completely avoid caffeine and sugar. Do a cardio workout for 45 minutes.

At the field, whenever you feel upset or sense that you’re getting too involved emotionally in what’s happening during the game, look up at the sky and tell yourself this: “There are thousands of games just like this going on all over the world. Kids are playing sports on fields in Africa and Ireland and Texas and Brazil. This is just one game, and it doesn’t matter at all.” Then try to imagine what the kids in other places are doing at that moment as they also play soccer.

If you can't help it, and you start yelling or getting into a confrontation with the officials or other parents, stop yourself by saying "No, no, no" to yourself, under your breath. Then turn around and walk away from the field. Watch the rest of the game at a distance.

Finally, if you do yell, it's not the end of the world. Think about how it's not important for you to be perfect, but just to do your best under trying circumstances. Think about doing a little better next time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This may seem ridiculous, but if the sideline is an unusually difficult place for you, maybe try this routine:

As soon as you wake up on game day, say a prayer or the secular equivalent to whatever authority feels powerful to you, whether it’s Mother Nature or God or the universe. In the prayer, you simply say that you turn everything over to the Father of Light for this day. You are placing all of your cares and worries and fears into his hands, and you are giving up control.

Prior to the game, completely avoid caffeine and sugar. Do a cardio workout for 45 minutes.

At the field, whenever you feel upset or sense that you’re getting too involved emotionally in what’s happening during the game, look up at the sky and tell yourself this: “There are thousands of games just like this going on all over the world. Kids are playing sports on fields in Africa and Ireland and Texas and Brazil. This is just one game, and it doesn’t matter at all.” Then try to imagine what the kids in other places are doing at that moment as they also play soccer.

If you can't help it, and you start yelling or getting into a confrontation with the officials or other parents, stop yourself by saying "No, no, no" to yourself, under your breath. Then turn around and walk away from the field. Watch the rest of the game at a distance.

Finally, if you do yell, it's not the end of the world. Think about how it's not important for you to be perfect, but just to do your best under trying circumstances. Think about doing a little better next time.

i like it!!!

[Anonymous]

Get a camera and take pictures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a camera and take pictures.

It works. One parent got kicked out of two games. Now he just takes pictures and no one knows he is there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any advice? DD's first game ever is tomorrow and I need some real life advice to not go crazy/overboard on the sideline because I know I would without making a concisious effort. Yes I know I'm 'living through my child' so to speak but that's something to be address longterm... I need help to start on the right path tomorrow!!! thx~

How old is your DD?

[Anonymous]

Ummmm. Just try to act normal.

[Anonymous]

I played goalkeeper (not a high level at all), so I tend to cheer any time either goalkeeper makes a good play or smart decision.

[Anonymous]

Here is how you can not be *that parent*. Cheer, but don't yell. Don't say anything critical of anyone. And cheer...say good job. And if the other team does a good play, cheer for them. Do not tell your kid what to do -- that is the coaches job. Finally, DO NOT SAY ANYTHING NEGATIVE TO THE REF.

Be positive, and it will be good.

[Anonymous]

Only positive comments. Cheer for the other team, too, when one of their players makes a good play. Remember that it is only a game. If your kid makes a mistake, shrug, oh well, it happens and it will be better next time. Anther kid on your kid's team makes a mistake, shrug, oh well, it happens, and it will be better next time.

I have been going to youth league, high school and college sports to cheer on my children for almost 20 years. Last week I was at a game that is in my top 10 for worst parent behavior. Apparently the parents have a rep because one of the refs told a parent on the sideline to warn the others that if they cheered inappropriately they would be ejected from the area. Despite this, they were still some of the worst sideline parents I have ever seen. At one point they were doing little happy dances, singing and giving thumbs-up to their kids on the field with loud cheers after the goalie for the opposing team scored for them. They were completely disgusting.

OP, it only takes witnessing something like this for you to realize that you do NOT want to be one of those parents.

[Anonymous]

I've coached about 250 youth soccer games from U8 to U16 over the last 7 years and all of the above is very good advice.

Thanks folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a camera and take pictures.

+1 This is a great idea.

[Anonymous]

I lost my voice after a night of drinking--so that will do it.

[Anonymous]

How old is your child?

I am not a sideline yeller by any means but had to become one for rec sports because all the other parents did and were always throwing out wonderfully positive comments and I just never knew what to say.

[Anonymous]

Let me tell you something, from a seasoned veteran soccer parent:

The younger and lower-level the player, the older and more obnoxious the parent. DON'T BE THAT PARENT.

Cheer and clap. THAT'S IT. If you have to coach and act like a buffoon, go watch it from your car.

Anecdotes:
At a tournament a few years ago, a mom RAN ONTO THE FIELD during the game to show the ref ON HER CAMERA a foul committed against her kid or her kids team. DONT DO THAT. EVER.

Recently I saw a lower level girls team game where a mom was arguing with her daughter (and the ref) from the sideline about how much time was left in the game. The team lost and the girl played terribly.

I see a number of games where the parent is berating the kid all the way to the car, kid in tears most of the time. DONT DO THAT. EVER.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let me tell you something, from a seasoned veteran soccer parent:

The younger and lower-level the player, the older and more obnoxious the parent. DON'T BE THAT PARENT.

Cheer and clap. THAT'S IT. If you have to coach and act like a buffoon, go watch it from your car.

Anecdotes:
At a tournament a few years ago, a mom RAN ONTO THE FIELD during the game to show the ref ON HER CAMERA a foul committed against her kid or her kids team. DONT DO THAT. EVER.

Recently I saw a lower level girls team game where a mom was arguing with her daughter (and the ref) from the sideline about how much time was left in the game. The team lost and the girl played terribly.

I see a number of games where the parent is berating the kid all the way to the car, kid in tears most of the time. DONT DO THAT. EVER.

That is supposed to read "LOUDER." Thanks, autocorrect.