How Do You Parent When You Had Bad Parents?

[Anonymous]

The meals and the homework stuff - please stop beating yourself up and trying to be Supermom. Be a good, nonjudgmental listener. Be a safe place to land. Take care of yourself so that you can be a relaxed and joyful presence. No, you don't have to be Merry Sunshine, but do focus on making Home and Mom a haven from the outside world. I also have an excellent memory of my happy childhood, and none of it centers on meals and tutoring. Bottom line - kids need stability at home and to know deep down that they are "enough" just as they are. There were nights when dinner was scrambled eggs and toast - who cares? Please be gentle on yourself and just love them. Just love them for exactly who they are. That is what I carry with me from my childhood. I hope you find peace with yourself. All parents make mistakes. Mine did. I am probably making mistakes with my baby girl as we speak.