is your child's school a far commute?

[Anonymous]

Agree w/ pp. Don't do it.

[Anonymous]

My daughter attends a school 5 miles away, but at least 20 minutes drive. We have less of a social life at the school because we are not "locals", I never want to attend parent events, if we didn't have carpool I would go crazy (and every year I worry about that).

I would probably choose closer to home if that were an option.

[Anonymous]

I work about 8 blocks from my children's school, and let me tell you, I have to run over there ALL the time: picking up sick kids, forgotten lunchboxes, school activities, sports gear, cupcakes for the class party, and so much more. When we looked at private schools, anything outside of DC was out of the question for that reason. Family convenience is a legitimate concern. Plus, remember that private schools start earlier than public, so it's going to mean your kid getting up and going to bed earlier.

[Anonymous]

For the families that chose local over the school they thought was great but too far - is it correct assumption that "local" translates into public?

[Anonymous]

No, in my case, local was not public.

[Anonymous]

For me, the closer choice was the public one. I should note that we didn't just choose "public," we chose our neighborhood public school and not one of the county-wide ones.

[Anonymous]

Does anyone do a REVERSE commute, and is that any less annoying?

[Anonymous]

A new poster with an alternate view: we have a 45 minute drive to our child's school each morning and do not regret our decision at all. Its about 20-25 minutes away with no traffic (in the afternoons) and a reliable 40-45 in the morning with traffic. The drive is a great chance for long chats, to listen to books on tape, to sing together, etc. We have a great time.

Our schedule: everyone up at 6:15. Full family sit-down hot breakfast at 6:45. In the car by 7:20-7:30. At school by 8:10-8:15 so I can get to work. Our child loves the drive and is excited to get in the car because they love listening to the books. Its basically story time for them, after a bit of talking.

Our younger child attends a local (10 minutes away) nursery school - I can't imagine doing the drive for a 9-12 program!

We feel that the school our child attends is a special place that is a very good fit for our values and academic standards. Obviously if you have two choices that are a similar fit, the closer school is easier. Our local choice was not nearly as good, we felt. But we don't dread the drive or regret our choice at all - I would do it again in a heartbeat.

[Anonymous]

To the PP thank - you for the different perspective - we applied to several schools which are about 40 - 45 minutes away from our home (in traffic) and face a similar issue if accepted - our local school does not compare to the schools we applied to. If we get accepted at any of the schools I am going to use your post as a guide for our morning. It sounds like your morning routine works well and is beneficial to all

PP: How has your child adjusted to making friends at his/her current school and still interacting with the children in the neighborhood??? Is this an issue with the commute when interacting with peers from school???

[Anonymous]

I have been wondering about this as well. We are primarily looking at two schools. One is 10 minutes away by car and also off the metro line we live on, so it would be easy for us to get to. It also attacts a fair number of kids from our neighborhood. The other is 20-40 (depending on traffic) each way. We really like both schools but the one closer by is an extra $5K per year and we have two kids so that is an extra $10K per year which really adds up over time. My DH (who would be doing 1/2 the driving) thinks we should pay the extra money if we get in and stay closer by but I think the commute might be worth it to have the extra money for travel, enrichment, college savings etc. I am worried though about playdate etc if we pick the school further out.

[Anonymous]

Re: question about play dates: I've recently talked to some folks about this and they said they have play dates and activities with kids in the neighborhood (neighbors; kids met through community activities or swim classes, etc.) and play dates with friends from school are a little less often than if they lived down the street BUT they do happen. Parents make it work. One family told me it actually ended up being very convenient because they would take their child to VA for a play date and after dropping him off had a free couple of hours to do errands out there. The parents who dropped their kids of in DC tried to use that time to have a nice lunch to themselves or even to stop by their office to get an extra hour or two of work in. So I think it just works out somehow, or at least that is the impression I've gotten.

[Anonymous]

To 11:11. You have to look inside yourself and see if you are the kind of person to take the initiative, or if you are more passive. Either answer is a fine one - just be sure to answer who you ARE and not who you wish you were. Are you willing to do 80% of the work to give your kids play dates? Are you willing to be extra-organized and plan things in advance? I presume you both work. Does the extra distance matter for chaperoning events, for attending mid-day pageants at school?.... These are the questions to answer for yourself.

And, what does that extra $10k mean? Is it really the college savings, or is it really just wardrobe and a posh vacation every year? [I don't know you, so don't take this as criticism. $10k if you are earning $300k is very different than if you are earning $200k or $100k or whatever]