Did you give up a large portion of your income in pursuit of a happier life?

[Anonymous]

Yes. I went from Biglaw to a federal agency at a 50%+ paycut, in advance of having children. DH and I wanted one of us to have a less demanding schedule while we have small kids, and at this juncture in our careers it made more sense for me to do it. It has worked out very well so far, but I hope to return to the private sector later.

[Anonymous]

I can point to three points in my career when I made choices that sacrificed money for family/meaningful work. Looking back, I would change my decisions.

Being financially stressed in middle age when care of parents and facing college with almost no savings is miserable. Did you know you can save cash by going without health insurance for two months a year without penalty? Sucks to be me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did it six years ago, and we've never been happier.

We have a nicely updated yet very small (2000 sq ft, if you include our finished basement) home. We don't have a big house to show off, but the trade off is that we take weekend getaways twice monthly in the summer months, and we take 2-3 vacations a year. Our experiences and leisure far outweigh the benefits of extra space in a house.

(We still make max contributions to retirement, and put funds into savings every month.)

We have friends with huge (mostly empty) houses, and they always want to know why we don't upgrade. But they never travel as much as we do, and we just prefer experience over space. And the cut in pay created the time we needed to have these adventures. For us, it works.

That is not a very small house.

[Anonymous]

I didn't go from high paying to low paying, but I'm a lawyer in a public service field and I don't make a lot of money. I make enough to pay my bills and have a cozy home. I get lots of vacation time and holidays, leave by 4:30 every day, and enjoy the work so it's worth it to me! You can't put a price on happiness. If material things aren't very important to you, I think you'll be happy with a decision to downsize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a pair of DC lawyers who dropped out of big law once they paid off loans. One became a SAHM to 4, the other became a music minister for a church in Idaho.

I think they're nuts, but they're happy and say it's the best thing they could've ever done for their family. To each his own.

This just makes me sad. So the whole law thing was a complete waste, simply worked to pay off loans -- would have same outcome if they just moved to Idaho directly..

Not necessarily. They have lawto fall back on in an emergency.

I can't imagine that being out the legal profession for years would make it easy to move back to practicing law. If you go to law school and end up in a career that doesn't require a legal degree or even value one then you truly wasted hundreds of thousands of dollars and years of your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a pair of DC lawyers who dropped out of big law once they paid off loans. One became a SAHM to 4, the other became a music minister for a church in Idaho.

I think they're nuts, but they're happy and say it's the best thing they could've ever done for their family. To each his own.

This just makes me sad. So the whole law thing was a complete waste, simply worked to pay off loans -- would have same outcome if they just moved to Idaho directly..

Not necessarily. They have lawto fall back on in an emergency.

I can't imagine that being out the legal profession for years would make it easy to move back to practicing law. If you go to law school and end up in a career that doesn't require a legal degree or even value one then you truly wasted hundreds of thousands of dollars and years of your life.

I agree on the career issue, but not on the waste of time - all the people I know have chosen their field because they loved it, even if it was stressful or meant working long hours. The time spent learning, training and working in a field you like is not a waste. Then, if your priorities change because your life circumstances are not the same, there is nothing wrong with leaving your job.

[Anonymous]

Not a major professional move but I just take off random days a few times a month just to do nothing. Keeps me happy and keeps me from caring when work sucks too much. It's a bit of a financial hit (mostly in the case of taking an actual vacay away- usually it ends up being a few weeks of leave without pay for a couple holidays a year because I've blown through my 4 weeks). In my field I don't have repercussions and just can't be bothered to care.

[Anonymous]

I cut my income by about 30% when I was only clearing around $90k. If freed up easily 20 hours a week for me and took off a lot of stress. I'd absolutely do it again.

[Anonymous]

Yes, although I did it pre-kids and it would be harder now.

I was a law firm lawyer, took a 40% paycut to go to government. It took 8 years to get my salary back to what it was fresh out of law school. But, absolutely worth it in every sense. No regrets.

For unrelated reasons I now have a very long commute, so I am looking at changing careers in order to stay closer to home. It's just one option on the table (we could move, I could go part-time, etc.) but I am absolutely willing to take another large cut to have more time with my family and less time commuting. Life is short.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:yes, best decision ever.

no one ever says at a funeral of somebody that the deceased wishes they could have spent more time more time at work or making more money............

Or that they wore expensive clothes, ate at the best restaurants, drove the nicest car, had the most beautiful home, went on magnificent trips, had housekeepers, nannies, knew all the right people, was a mover and shaker ... one week after you die all that is said is poor thing, she's dead.

The money and goodies it brings may be fun but it's not the only thing this world has to offer. My sister for example is on soulmate number 5, always moves up, never happy. I wouldn't trade places with her for any amount of money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a pair of DC lawyers who dropped out of big law once they paid off loans. One became a SAHM to 4, the other became a music minister for a church in Idaho.

I think they're nuts, but they're happy and say it's the best thing they could've ever done for their family. To each his own.

This just makes me sad. So the whole law thing was a complete waste, simply worked to pay off loans -- would have same outcome if they just moved to Idaho directly..

Not necessarily. They have lawto fall back on in an emergency.

I can't imagine that being out the legal profession for years would make it easy to move back to practicing law. If you go to law school and end up in a career that doesn't require a legal degree or even value one then you truly wasted hundreds of thousands of dollars and years of your life.

I agree on the career issue, but not on the waste of time - all the people I know have chosen their field because they loved it, even if it was stressful or meant working long hours. The time spent learning, training and working in a field you like is not a waste. Then, if your priorities change because your life circumstances are not the same, there is nothing wrong with leaving your job.

+1. Presumably there were things they enjoyed about law school and law firm life (I enjoyed both, before leaving for something slower). Also, they were paying off loans but probably also eating well, dressing well, seeing shows, and socking away a downpayment for a house ... obviously I don't know, but that's the pattern I and my friends followed. I do know one person who couch-surfed from Day 1 in order to quit as soon as possible, but most people enjoy the work for years before they realize they want to change direction -- and that's when they start saving money and paying down debt quickly.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks everyone - this has been really nice to read. So many happy people!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:yes, best decision ever.

no one ever says at a funeral of somebody that the deceased wishes they could have spent more time more time at work or making more money............

Or that they wore expensive clothes, ate at the best restaurants, drove the nicest car, had the most beautiful home, went on magnificent trips, had housekeepers, nannies, knew all the right people, was a mover and shaker ... one week after you die all that is said is poor thing, she's dead.

The money and goodies it brings may be fun but it's not the only thing this world has to offer. My sister for example is on soulmate number 5, always moves up, never happy. I wouldn't trade places with her for any amount of money.

You're wrong on the 'magnificent trips' point. My Dad died somewhat suddenly at 68. We took an extended family trip overseas exactly once, when he was 65. It was a stretch financially at that time, but I'm so grateful to have spent that time with him. And that his grandchildren got to know him better during that week. Those are cherished memories.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a pair of DC lawyers who dropped out of big law once they paid off loans. One became a SAHM to 4, the other became a music minister for a church in Idaho.

I think they're nuts, but they're happy and say it's the best thing they could've ever done for their family. To each his own.

This just makes me sad. So the whole law thing was a complete waste, simply worked to pay off loans -- would have same outcome if they just moved to Idaho directly..

Not necessarily. They have lawto fall back on in an emergency.

I can't imagine that being out the legal profession for years would make it easy to move back to practicing law. If you go to law school and end up in a career that doesn't require a legal degree or even value one then you truly wasted hundreds of thousands of dollars and years of your life.

If they had continued spending their lives doing something they hated, they would have wasted the rest of their lives. Don't throw good years after bad.

- happy former lawyer

Also, I think I worked at the same firm as the PP who knows those two lawyers. Not certain about the Idaho location but I know a pretty senior big law attorney that left to SAH with 4 kids and someone who went off to divinity school.

[Anonymous]

"Don't throw good years after bad."

Love this!