Fued over money

[Anonymous]

+1
since inheritance happens at death, and aunt was alive then, clearly ½ the money should go to aunt's estate ie your cousins

[Anonymous]

1/2 should go to them .

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your aunt was the favorite and your Dad's still hurting. He needs to forgive his parents and your aunt, and let go of both his anger and the money.

He thinks he's righting an injustice by keeping the money, but that's misguided. Relationships cannot be fixed by keeping score.

Upon their death, his father's last action was to treat them both the same----half to each kid. He should honor that intent, not just because it's the right thing to do, but also for his own self healing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think your father is being very childish and unfair. Half the money should go to your cousins.

??? Wasn't the money left to surviving children? He's the only surviving child. The money is not for his kids or nieces/nephews.

OP, it's your dad's money. He should be able to do whatever he wants. Your uncle is a douche.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think your father is being very childish and unfair. Half the money should go to your cousins.

??? Wasn't the money left to surviving children? He's the only surviving child. The money is not for his kids or nieces/nephews.

OP, it's your dad's money. He should be able to do whatever he wants. Your uncle is a douche.

Why do you have trouble understanding that the aunt _was_ a surviving child at the time the money was left? It appears the executor somehow missed this asset, which was just an error, and cannot negate the facts.

Dad is a jerk, he needs to fork over aunt's half to her kids.

[Anonymous]

The answer really depends on how the investment account was structured as well as how the will was written. Was your dad a beneficiary of the account, or were the assets part of the estate? Did the will have any provisions regarding the death of an heir?

I'd have your dad talk to the estate attorney. He may be right, but he also may not be. No opinions here really matter. Also, you and all your cousins need to grow up. You should stay out of it and tell your cousins to do the same.

[Anonymous]

I agree that your dad should give half the money to the cousins. I think the fact that the uncle is giving it directly to his kids should make the decision SO MUCH easier.

This is unfortunate. I'm sorry, OP. Are you close with your dad? Would he be open to your asking him to be the bigger person for the sake of the family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree that your dad should give half the money to the cousins. I think the fact that the uncle is giving it directly to his kids should make the decision SO MUCH easier.

This is unfortunate. I'm sorry, OP. Are you close with your dad? Would he be open to your asking him to be the bigger person for the sake of the family?

PP again. Wanted to make a small correction. I really didn't mean "bigger person" as that implies that the uncle is in the wrong, and I don't think he is. I just mean for him to rise up above his resentments and hurt (that has nothing to do with the cousins) and be a fair/decent person.

[Anonymous]

Your uncle is a good man for giving your aunt's estate to her kids. Most men whose wives pass away just remarry quickly and the new wife ends up getting all of the money mom meant for her kids.

How many cousins total are there? 3? More?

Your father could be destroying family relationships, including you and your relationship with your own cousins, over what might amount to roughly six to twelve thousand dollars per cousin.

That seems like throwing away money.

If he is hell bent on inheriting all the money himself, can you talk him into gifting a portion directly to each cousin? Surely his hang up is with his sister and her husband and not the kids.

[Anonymous]

1) The aunt was alive when the grandfather passed, so by that measure the asset should be split.

2) Are you sure there was no "per stirpes" clause in the will, meaning aunt's children would get her share if she were deceased?

3) Is your dad okay with ruining your relationship with your cousins over $25k? Because that will be the end result of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The estate lawyer could figure this out pretty quickly, but the aunt was alive when they died so it should go to her estate.

The issue is not when the money was found. The right to it is determined at death regardless of the date of distribution. If I were the uncle I'd sue.

As for you, not much you can do.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure there is a legal answer to this question that could easily resolve the issue of who legally gets the money but honestly who cares? The money is tearing up the bonds of family and I suppose $25,000 is the number your dad can sell his family for. If I were you I wouldn't take sides, I'd counsel my dad to let go of his anger and resentment before it's too late. He won't listen of course but you don't need to get pulled into it. Act with grace to all of your family members and stay out of the fray

[Anonymous]

I think it's very obvious that your dad is wrong on this, OP. Probably legally, but definitely morally.

[Anonymous]

How old are your cousins? If they're adults, why give the money to your uncle instead of directly to the cousins?

I'd say your dad is wrong, but it's clear he is hurting and resentful, rather than just being greedy. Has he talked with uncle about his feelings that grandparents helped aunt and uncle but a house but not him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's very obvious that your dad is wrong on this, OP. Probably legally, but definitely morally.

Depends on the will.

Morally... morality is made up anyway Enjoy the change, OP!