An update on my relationship with Niece, Bro and SIL

[Anonymous]

I will be blunt. I would find you extremely annoying, I would also keep you at arms length.

[Anonymous]

This whole thread and the previous thread seem strange to me. I admit I could not read through all the comments because I could not get past your brother and SIL looking down on you because you are not as successful as them in spite of you seeming to be a nice and thoughtful person. My husband and I fit the success profile of your brother and SIL but we would never treat a family member with less than we with such condescension. When our kids were young, I had a niece who was down on her luck, had failed the first year of college and could not pass a cosmetology licensing exam. She was just simply lost in life. We invited her into our home to help care for our kids. I looked at it as I needed her and she needed me. She moved out several years ago and I still miss her. OP, your brother and SIL seem like assholes and they don't appreciate you. You should really stop trying to please them if they will never recognize you for the bright light you are. As hard as it is, you need to carve out your own life. You can still be cordial and call from time to time, but move forward with your life. I wish you the best.

[Anonymous]

Your experience with your brother and SIL (and baby) resonate so, so much with me.

Just be careful how much you give. It can really lead to being taking advantage of, lack of appreciation, looking down upon, and then a ton of resentment.

Things can go from "everything is looking rosy with the new baby!" to "You stayed out all night while I was babysitting and long after you'd come back, didn't return my calls, didn't apologize, didn't feel bad about it, because we thought you'd be ok with it" real fast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:New update from OP: their nanny is on vacation, so last week SIL stayed home with the baby and this week my brother is. Yesterday my brother and the baby came to my work so we could go to lunch together. I brought a book for my niece to have. She liked the tag on the back.

We went to a restaurant and one of us had to stay with the baby while another got the food. I asked who and my brother asked which I wanted to do. Of course I said I wanted to stay with the baby. So we sat outside and I chatted with her (10.5 months) alone. I was really surprised my brother let me be alone with her.

Then I got to feed her, which was super fun. At one point I asked "Can I just come over every night after work to feed B dinner?" and we chatted about how even doing things like feeding or diaper changes or baths are fun despite the fact that they aren't "playing."

My heart is so full after yesterday. When I got back to my desk I seriously couldn't focus for a good ten minutes.

A health interest turning into obsession?