Does your fert doc discuss how meds you take can affect child's sexual/gender identity?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that also some of the older, wealthier parents perceive themselves as being more attuned to this stuff and feel like they must run with it the second it presents itself.

We have a child who has expressed some confusion about his identity since he was quite small. He may actually be transgender or possibly gay, but we didn't think this was something to indulge at the age of 3 and 4. Now that he's 9, it's died down. When he hits an age of reason and has the capacity to truly internalize and understand all of this, we will support him in whatever he feels he needs to do.

What we have a problem is the idea that we have to take very seriously and run around on tenterhooks dealing with a child who insists he's a girl and prefers "girl" things, and we're supposed to completely ignore our other child who insists he's a dog. Experimentation and conflating fantasy with reality is a developmental phase.

Or your DC now is aware of your deep disapproval and fears the loss of your love.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I made a similar error in causation about 4 years ago when I began working in an affluent school with many students with LD and ASD. Nearly all the mothers were older and there were many IVF twins and at least one set of triplets in each grade. I ignorantly thought it must be the fertility treatments, including (and I am deeply ashamed of this thought now), the idea that lower quality embryos had survived that without medical intervention wouldn't have implanted or would have spontaneously aborted. Luckily, I had a friend set me straight before I embarrassed myself or hurt someone's feelings. These kids were at my school because their parents could afford both AR and a school that met their children's SN. The AR didn't cause their SN. It didn't cause the kids at your school being LGBTQ.
Going through AR is tough enough, don't freak parents out that they've saddled their kids with a more difficult row to hoe in life.

This is such an intelligent, thoughtful post. But given the OP's tone, I doubt your sensitivity will make it through. When people want to be able to make a connection between two things, and they are intent on punishing others for some decision they've made, they will find ways to justify their thought process. I don't think the OP is innocently looking for connections; she is looking for ways to criticize other women, specifically older women and/or women who have taken fertility treatments.

OP, your thought process is similar to saying that Mexicans are rapists.

[Anonymous]

Equating gay kids with rapist is also a bit questionable, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that also some of the older, wealthier parents perceive themselves as being more attuned to this stuff and feel like they must run with it the second it presents itself.

We have a child who has expressed some confusion about his identity since he was quite small. He may actually be transgender or possibly gay, but we didn't think this was something to indulge at the age of 3 and 4. Now that he's 9, it's died down. When he hits an age of reason and has the capacity to truly internalize and understand all of this, we will support him in whatever he feels he needs to do.

What we have a problem is the idea that we have to take very seriously and run around on tenterhooks dealing with a child who insists he's a girl and prefers "girl" things, and we're supposed to completely ignore our other child who insists he's a dog. Experimentation and conflating fantasy with reality is a developmental phase.

Or your DC now is aware of your deep disapproval and fears the loss of your love.

Nope. He's gotten all the fairy tutus, pink clothes and cakes, and Barbies that he's wanted. His siblings defend him when other kids poke fun at school. We're just not investing in the transgendered-rights-for-under-10s lobby and industry that's out there. He really needs to be free to be whoever he's going to become and not boxed in at an early age by locking anything in. Isn't that really what it's supposed to be about?

[Anonymous]

When parents have kids who are different, and the parents have means, they often seek out private schools.

[Anonymous]

I think the OP raises an interesting question about whether fertility drs have explored or noticed anecdotally differences in children conceived with technology.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Equating gay kids with rapist is also a bit questionable, PP.

Duh I said her thought process, I wasn't making an anology. Don't be dense

[Anonymous]

Scientifically there would be little basis for your hypothesis. The genitals do develop during the first two months of pregnancy, when ART patients might still be on progesterone supplementation (keep in mind that people who don't use IVF also often get this for other reasons). But the brain is also sexed and brain development linked to sexual differentiation happens in the second half of the pregnancy. Your hormone levels then would be dependent on the placenta. They would also be many many times the levels of what is achieved during the IVF process.

So in short, very unlikely hypothesis.

[Anonymous]

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/21094885/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/21094885/

This has nothing whatsoever to do with fertility treatments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because there is no known or assumed link homosexuality and fertility treatments, fertility doctors are not going to latch onto your personal illogical opinion and transmit it to their patients. Perhaps if you took the foil hat off.

Drugs given for morning sickness caused abnormalities in sexual organs of children. Drugs given for prevention of miscarriage?

Those drugs were used decades ago and had nothing to do with fertility treatments. The link you've imagined does not exist and you don't even know if the people you used for your "data" had fertility treatments. You're really deranged.

[Anonymous]

The hormones used for fertility treatments are HCG and progesterone, which are naturally produced in huge quantities by the mother during pregnancy anyway. The developing baby is not getting anything every other baby gets in utero.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the OP raises an interesting question about whether fertility drs have explored or noticed anecdotally differences in children conceived with technology.

The interesting point here is that fertility doctors do not follow or document the development of the children they assisted in conceiving, so there is no information on that at all, not even anecdotal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you are substituting correlation with causation.

My husband and I are 40. We both can't remember any kid in our high school class who was gay, much less bi or trans. (We do know from Facebook that some of those kids did turn out to be gay, bi, and even one person was trans and now lives as a woman.) In contrast, DH's little sister is 17 years younger. When she was in high school, many kids were out and lots more were experimenting, even if they ultimately were heterosexual. It's not fertility drugs that changed kids. It's the culture of acceptance for sexual and gender identity that has changed and kids are reacting to it by being open about their feelings.

I am not substituting causation for correlation. I am noticing correlation and asking about causation. You are also noticing correlation, and attributing causation. Where is what you have posited proved? Its a nice hypothesis, and I am offering another hypothesis.Isn't it possible that if your only child is gay, and you are too old to have another one, you would be much more likely to be accepting and supportive.
You and the sister fit in perfectly to the age demographic. In 1975 hardly anyone was taking fertility drugs- the first "test tube" baby was barely born.
By the 1990s there were fertility clinics everywhere.
I am for acceptance. That isn't the issue here.

This is kind of OT but fertility drugs & test tube babies are not one in the same. The first test tube baby was born in 1978 but my mom used fertility drugs to conceive my sister in 1974.

[Anonymous]

There isn't even an anecdotal link between homosexuality and fertility treatments. The only known condition linked to fertility treatments is premature birth, usually a result of multiples. Homosexuality is not linked to prematurity but autism and ADHD is.