Does your DH ever play with the kids?

[Anonymous]

Wow - my DH is amazing with my 3 year old and he is the one who has brought up the fact that he's going to be spending extra time with her this summer when #2 is born.

[Anonymous]

Yes, he does a lot. DS is 3 and DH has a hard time with the imagininative play (DH says he wasn't a very imaginative kid so it's just his make up) so they will do more physical activities, do puzzles, read, etc. I think finding activities that your husband enjoys doing and figuring out how to incorporate that with the kiddos is the best way to go about it.

[Anonymous]

Nope-DH wanted nothing to do with our DC until they were 10 and started sports- sad.

[Anonymous]

Yes, thank goodness. I am not very good at that job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope-DH wanted nothing to do with our DC until they were 10 and started sports- sad.

OP here. Did you ever talk to him about it? I'm on maternity leave right now so I don't feel like it's the right time. He would just point out that I'm not working and he is so of course I should be doing it all. Was your DH's father the same? Mine was and I feel like he's just repeating what he experienced growing up.

[Anonymous]

Nope, he doesn't! I actually don't play with my kids either. I'm a SAHM and I spend a lot of time with them (reading, hanging out, chatting, etc), but I really hate playing, especially dolls! They are 5 and 8. They are girls and they spend hours playing together.

[Anonymous]

Show your husband this thread, op.

[Anonymous]

Yup and ours is only 3 weeks old. Daddy is in barge of tummy time and he makes a game out of it counting off fake push-ups and cheering her on. He is also the burp master and reads the newspaper to her in a funny voice. I anticipate this transferring to actual playing when she is old enough to interact. Your DH sounds strange. Why have kids if not to hang out with them.
But playing doesn't have to be the only way to interact. Involving them in regular activities like cooking and yard stuff and reading works too.

[Anonymous]

Yup. I basically took today "off" and DH played with our 8 month old all day. They had a blast.

[Anonymous]

My husband is way better at pretend play than me. He can have a running commentary on with my 3.5 yo for days, whereas I get tired of it after about 10-15 minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband is way better at pretend play than me. He can have a running commentary on with my 3.5 yo for days, whereas I get tired of it after about 10-15 minutes.

Btw, it's lame that your husband is being like this. I have an 8 month old as well and we've mostly divided the work (one takes the preschooler, one takes the baby) since the baby was born. It's completely unfair that you always have both (especially while on maternity leave and probably not getting much sleep!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope-DH wanted nothing to do with our DC until they were 10 and started sports- sad.

OP here. Did you ever talk to him about it? I'm on maternity leave right now so I don't feel like it's the right time. He would just point out that I'm not working and he is so of course I should be doing it all. Was your DH's father the same? Mine was and I feel like he's just repeating what he experienced growing up.

I'm not the PP. But how does maternity leave have anything to do with it? You're doing the childcare 24/7 and you need a break, whether you are on maternity leave or not. When I have DC2 this fall and am on maternity leave I'll need DH more than ever to entertain DS while I'm taking care of a newborn. I expect they'll be doing a lot of trips to the playground. I know for me personally just because I'm on maternity leave does not mean I am doing this 24/7 alone when I have a DH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, more than I do. He is happy to roll around on the floor making ridiculous noises and pretending with them - I'm happy to watch

+1

[Anonymous]

More than me. He seems to have infinite patience for playing, whereas I don't. I'm happy to read for hours or do arts and crafts, but playing picnic or tea party or whatever is just not something I can do for more than 10 minutes an activity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is way better at pretend play than me. He can have a running commentary on with my 3.5 yo for days, whereas I get tired of it after about 10-15 minutes.

Btw, it's lame that your husband is being like this. I have an 8 month old as well and we've mostly divided the work (one takes the preschooler, one takes the baby) since the baby was born. It's completely unfair that you always have both (especially while on maternity leave and probably not getting much sleep!).

16:44 here -- this is exactly w hat we anticipate doing with our two. I was going to say that I wondered if it was the SAHM dynamic or not, but then I remembered that OP is going back to work soon. Hang in there, OP, and maybe it will change once you do start working and you're both forced to more equally share responsibility. Is your husband planning to take any additional time off with the baby when you're not around? If not, maybe you can try leaving him alone with the baby for an afternoon at a time so you can run errands, get ready for work (e.g. go buy some clothes, get your nails done, go out and buy pumping supplies, etc.). I'm just wondering if maybe he's intimidated because you're around all the time.