Just for fun: visiting parents bringing food

[Anonymous]

Always hard boiled eggs. Because they are so good after 7 hours in the car.

[Anonymous]

After my divorce, my parents showed up with the back of their pickup filled with food-10lb bag of flour, 20lbs of potatoes, 10lbs of apples, assorted canned goods.

[Anonymous]

Awww...let it go.

My parents and ILs live in another country, and I miss them like crazy.

My MIL called today and told me that she felt so bad that she could not send sweets for us when my DH visited them for a day last week. I told her that it was ok, and she replied "But you kids come after such a long time...and I kept thinking after he left that I could have made some more of his favorite dishes if I had more time!". She is 80 and in failing health and yet all she can think is to feed us or send us stuff that we do not use or need.

I let all of her little idiosyncrasies go because her heart is in the right place, and it makes her so happy when we do things her way for these little things.

[Anonymous]

I saw this once with an elderly neighbor (not mine) giving her nearby neighbors opened jars/containers, loaves of bread, etc. that might go bad while she was out of town on vacation. Incredibly sweet and very frugal woman. She just couldn't stand the thought of wasting all that food....

I think you just accept it and toss while they aren't looking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After my divorce, my parents showed up with the back of their pickup filled with food-10lb bag of flour, 20lbs of potatoes, 10lbs of apples, assorted canned goods.

That's sweet. I'd be at a loss with what to do with 10 lbs of flour though.

[Anonymous]

I don't have any relations who do this, but I have friends whose parents/inlaws travel with bags of groceries from NJ to DC. For their own use while visiting. Because we don't have grocery stores or things are so much cheaper in NJ??

Otherwise, I would chalk it up to weird frugality, but I would never eat something that's been sitting in a car for a long ride or whatever. Gross. Besides, I have enough crap to clean out of my fridge, I don't need anyone else's.

[Anonymous]

OMG!!!! Total depression era mindset. My mother not only does this -- she will actually put open cans of soda with 2-3 teaspoons of backwash in the fridge, but my much older SIL does as well.

As my husband and I were leaving for our honeymoon -- literally, about to get in the taxi -- my SIL was trying to convince us to take her leftover chef salad with us on our honeymoon because she didn't want it to go to waste.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After my divorce, my parents showed up with the back of their pickup filled with food-10lb bag of flour, 20lbs of potatoes, 10lbs of apples, assorted canned goods.

That is so sweet. Like a bear hug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Awww...let it go.

My parents and ILs live in another country, and I miss them like crazy.

My MIL called today and told me that she felt so bad that she could not send sweets for us when my DH visited them for a day last week. I told her that it was ok, and she replied "But you kids come after such a long time...and I kept thinking after he left that I could have made some more of his favorite dishes if I had more time!". She is 80 and in failing health and yet all she can think is to feed us or send us stuff that we do not use or need.

I let all of her little idiosyncrasies go because her heart is in the right place, and it makes her so happy when we do things her way for these little things.

Who says OP doesn't let it go? She's for-fun posting about it here, not yelling at her mom. Your parents/ILs living in another country have nothing to do with this dynamic being funny/quiet/annoying for those of us who do experience it.

[Anonymous]

I think it's a combo of the older generation feeling tremendously guilty for throwing things out, and an expression of love (though for some in toxic situations it's control, I know). My FIL does this, he always visits with food, or has a cooler of sandwiches and pop for the ride to his place when he gets us at the airport. I think it's just his way of saying I love you and I'm glad to see you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Omg the coolers taken to the beach. Could we just eat out. We're on vacation!

Yes! Why does a 3-hour car trip require a cooler of sandwiches and a sad half-jar of pickles? Can we please just go to Wendy's?

We pack lunches because it's expensive to eat out even when it's just Wendy's. That $25 may not be much to you but it is to my family and, perhaps, to your parents. Yet, if I can save $15 by packing lunch, i don't have a problem spending the money saved on ice cream or something.

Call it Depression Mentality if you want but there's nothing wrong with being thrifty and frugal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Awww...let it go.

My parents and ILs live in another country, and I miss them like crazy.

My MIL called today and told me that she felt so bad that she could not send sweets for us when my DH visited them for a day last week. I told her that it was ok, and she replied "But you kids come after such a long time...and I kept thinking after he left that I could have made some more of his favorite dishes if I had more time!". She is 80 and in failing health and yet all she can think is to feed us or send us stuff that we do not use or need.

I let all of her little idiosyncrasies go because her heart is in the right place, and it makes her so happy when we do things her way for these little things.

Who says OP doesn't let it go? She's for-fun posting about it here, not yelling at her mom. Your parents/ILs living in another country have nothing to do with this dynamic being funny/quiet/annoying for those of us who do experience it.

It is pretty sick that making fun of people's good intentions is considered "fun."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Omg the coolers taken to the beach. Could we just eat out. We're on vacation!

Yes! Why does a 3-hour car trip require a cooler of sandwiches and a sad half-jar of pickles? Can we please just go to Wendy's?

We pack lunches because it's expensive to eat out even when it's just Wendy's. That $25 may not be much to you but it is to my family and, perhaps, to your parents. Yet, if I can save $15 by packing lunch, i don't have a problem spending the money saved on ice cream or something.

Call it Depression Mentality if you want but there's nothing wrong with being thrifty and frugal.

It is generally healthier, too.

[Anonymous]

We do the cooler in the car and at the beach thing. I think it's just smart and healthy. Rest stop food is either junk, or if it's healthy it's overpriced ($5 for a small cup of cut up fruit!)

[Anonymous]

My mother sends a week's worth of freshly made food with us whenever we go up to visit her. She spends the entire weekend cooking so it will be ready. It's a lifesaver for me and I'm so grateful!