Jealous of sister's boyfriend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your sister may have a higher bar than you. And sounds like she doesn't entertain dudes she doesn't think are worthy. You sound like you do.

Yep. Because of her attractiveness she turned down so many guys. When I heard she was finally dating a guy I was super curious to see who caught her eye. Turned out he seems like a very quality dude. Wonderful smart guy who is also rich. Like...I didn't even know they were attainable!!

[Anonymous]

I understand your pain OP. HOWEVER - my best friend and I were both single for a long stretch. I finally started online dating, and fairly quickly met the love of my life. She's still single and while she's never said a word, I feel immensely guilty.

However... it could have just as easily been her who met the love of her life. I could still be single. It just is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sister dated and eventually married a guy, who to me, treated her much like you say your sister's boyfriend treats her. She always got the great gifts. They eventually got married, and then divorced only a couple of years later because it turned out, he was an abusive and alcoholic husband. Be careful with the the ones who seem too good to be true.

I am sure OP feels better now, knowing there is a high chance of her sister's bf being an abusive drunk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fancy gifts aren't a measure of a good relationship. You're looking at superficial things. The lack of drama is important, though, as is his good treatment of her.

Why did it take your sister a year to say yes to a date? Perhaps, like you, she was drawn to drama/tension/unavailable men and it took some persuasion for her to give him a chance.

So you do the same - open your mind to people you might not mmediately attracted to. Don't date someone who isn't kind and sincere. You can choose a better quality partner.
But Tiffany earrings don't mean anything. I mean, they're nice but you don't need that.

She first didn't want to date him and then his persistence and wooing with boxes upon boxes of expensive chocolates won her over.

I just can't believe how picture perfect he appears to be. Very nice, thoughtful, fully commited to her, from a close knit loving family, super rich.

It seems unreal!

But why didn't she want to date him at first? He wasn't her usual type, right?

That's totally wacked if she only dated him after he gave her "boxes and boxes" of chocolates. WTF?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fancy gifts aren't a measure of a good relationship. You're looking at superficial things. The lack of drama is important, though, as is his good treatment of her.

Why did it take your sister a year to say yes to a date? Perhaps, like you, she was drawn to drama/tension/unavailable men and it took some persuasion for her to give him a chance.

So you do the same - open your mind to people you might not mmediately attracted to. Don't date someone who isn't kind and sincere. You can choose a better quality partner.
But Tiffany earrings don't mean anything. I mean, they're nice but you don't need that.

She first didn't want to date him and then his persistence and wooing with boxes upon boxes of expensive chocolates won her over.

I just can't believe how picture perfect he appears to be. Very nice, thoughtful, fully commited to her, from a close knit loving family, super rich.

It seems unreal!

But why didn't she want to date him at first? He wasn't her usual type, right?

That's totally wacked if she only dated him after he gave her "boxes and boxes" of chocolates. WTF?

I have no idea why she finally dated him. He was apparently in love with her for about a year. BTW he gave her the boxes of chocolates every few weeks when they started dating.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your sister is better in bed. Just sayin'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:No one has ever done that for me. I've had to fight and scream and cry to get get an ex BF to even get me flowers. For my Valentines dates I usually just get a dinner out if I'm lucky.

I feel really bummed and honestly jealous. I deserve to be treated well too.

Maybe the fighting and screaming is part of your problem? Yes, you deserve to be treated well, but you also reap what you sow.

I'm referencing an incident where a BF never got me flowers or chocolates after a year of dating. I'd casually mention wanting flowers to explicitly and nicely saying, " honey I'd love it if you surprised me with pink flowers."

Nothing.

I then felt sorry for myself and cried.

Yes. She certainly is more conventionally attractive. Skinny drake but big boobs, nice head of thick Kate Middleton hair and gorgeous smile. She looks like a movie star and turns heads when she enters rooms. She is also very popular and friendly. Her BF is obviously pretty wealthy since he spent a lot on her for Christmas too. His family is very well to do.

I'm not ugly but I'm pretty plain and pretty old now at 30. Even at my prime I did not receive the attention she did and the only guys who would approach me were loser-ish with personality or social issues. They were also never this rich.

I can't help but feel shitty since she's obviously a better catch than me and so gets attention, and the right kind from better quality guys.

is your sister hotter, more feminine, and sweeter than you are?

I'm the guy that asked if your sister was hotter - your answer tells me that you are a troll.

The 'pretty old now at 30' is BS - and this coming from a guy.

[Anonymous]

haha 12 year olds are on the loose tonight, drumming up badly written OPs and fooling the nation.

go to sleep troll, its almost 10.15 and its a school night!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
It might not last, which won't be so bad either.

DH got me the most stunning flowers when we were dating, as well as interesting nights out. No jewelry, because he was poor at the time.
Then we got married, he did buy me jewelry, and little by little those kinds of attentions petered out.
I don't care, because our minds are now focused on other things, and Valentine's Day is not important anymore. Or as DH explained to his work colleague, every day is Valentine's Day.

Ditto. I had someone who was thoughtful and wooed (sp?) me. Not only did that taper out, he was also hiding many negative aspects of his character at the beginning. It was all a facade.

[Anonymous]

Yes you surely do!! I agree completely OP!!

What you get to see right now is all surface stuff, nothing more.

You have no idea what else this guy is about! You only see the cleaned up version.

I am not saying that he is really a jerk underneath. He does sound like an awesome boyfriend, it's just that you need to take your head out of the clouds and take off your rose-colored specs.

Honey Prince Charming only exists in the mind. No one of us is perfect!! Anytime someone uses that word to describe an individual is a reminder that they are fantasizing and romanticizing an ideal rather than realizing that each and every one of us has their own cross in life to bear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your sister is better in bed. Just sayin'.

+1

[Anonymous]

He's a player.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is you. I've found that the people with the most drama in their lives, cause it and relish it.

Yep

x a million

and by the way, EVERYONE deserves to be treated well, not just little princesses with fairy tales running through their heads

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh! Change your attitude. It is very ugly in its neediness.

+1! OP, you're on the fast train to hated/hateful SIL!

As the song says: "find a man of your own." (Saving all My Love for You, W. Houston)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one has ever done that for me. I've had to fight and scream and cry to get get an ex BF to even get me flowers. For my Valentines dates I usually just get a dinner out if I'm lucky.

I feel really bummed and honestly jealous. I deserve to be treated well too.

Maybe the fighting and screaming is part of your problem? Yes, you deserve to be treated well, but you also reap what you sow.

I'm referencing an incident where a BF never got me flowers or chocolates after a year of dating. I'd casually mention wanting flowers to explicitly and nicely saying, " honey I'd love it if you surprised me with pink flowers."

Nothing.

I then felt sorry for myself and cried.

Yes. She certainly is more conventionally attractive. Skinny drake but big boobs, nice head of thick Kate Middleton hair and gorgeous smile. She looks like a movie star and turns heads when she enters rooms. She is also very popular and friendly. Her BF is obviously pretty wealthy since he spent a lot on her for Christmas too. His family is very well to do.

I'm not ugly but I'm pretty plain and pretty old now at 30. Even at my prime I did not receive the attention she did and the only guys who would approach me were loser-ish with personality or social issues. They were also never this rich.

I can't help but feel shitty since she's obviously a better catch than me and so gets attention, and the right kind from better quality guys.

is your sister hotter, more feminine, and sweeter than you are?

I'm the guy that asked if your sister was hotter - your answer tells me that you are a troll.

The 'pretty old now at 30' is BS - and this coming from a guy.

Too true! A guy who may "identify" as female but only in 1950s stereotypes.

How old are you, really, OP? 65?