My friend thinks she's an amateur food critic.

[Anonymous]

What about the next time she suggests a fancy place just say something like, 'you know what, I'm in the mood for comfort food, how about we go to x diner' or something. A place that is not about the food so there won't be those 'new fancy restuarant' expectations on it.

[Anonymous]

I'm guessing you've never had a meal with a "foodie" like this. My MIL gets into this sometimes. It takes her like 10 min to property setup her plate, remove background distractions from the view of the camera, keep checking the picture on her phone to see if she got it just right, and the uploading & writing the post. Sometimes she wants to do this with other people's food or with shared dishes as well. We're all supposed to just sit there and not eat until she's done. SUPER annoying. And the food discussion can take up the ENTIRE meal.

Oh holy shit, I've observed people like this next to me at restaurants and it irrationally enrages me. I want to punch them in the throat.

(and yes, I'm well aware this "doesn't affect" me and I should MYOB).

[Anonymous]

Can't you tease her? Make a little fun of her? just to make uncomfortable enough so that she may stop....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL. She's like 10 years too late to this hobby.

Just make plans that don't involve food, OP.

When you're a foodie, every plan involves food in one way or another.

(I am not a foodie.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a close friend who is a foodie.

Every dining out experience must be at a new, hip place. Every meal is dissected while eating and very often the food isn't really that amazing (according to her). Lots of taking photos of the food and posting on social media. (Am I the only person who finds these photos not terribly interesting? Or is mildly annoyed that dinner turns into a photo shoot?)

I get it, this is her hobby and she enjoys it. But it's kind of a buzzkill. Sometimes dinner is just dinner and you eat at the old standby or someplace conveniently located.

I'm beginning to almost dread planning dinner out with this friend.

I guess I'm venting. She's a good person and a long-time friend. So I wouldn't consider not being friends with her. I just need to deal, right? Or is there a tactful way to point out this is annoying?

I have a close friend who is a Democrat (big D democrat).

Every discussion must be about politics. Every news update is dissected while eating and very often the subject isn't really that amazing (according to me). Lots of posting on social media. (Am I the only person who finds these subjects not terribly interesting? Or is mildly annoyed that dinner turns into a political debate?)

I get it, this is her hobby and she enjoys it. But it's kind of a buzzkill. I'm beginning to almost dread conversations with this friend.

I guess I'm venting. She's a good person and a long-time friend. So I wouldn't consider not being friends with her. I just need to deal, right? Or is there a tactful way to point out this is annoying?

I DID try saying that it was Saturday night and I was not interested, but to no avail Some hobbies just cannot be broken, sorry

[Anonymous]

I don't know -- While non-stop politics can also be annoying, I find that there is something specifically annoying about talking exhaustively about food while eating, to the point where I want to yell, "I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT MY FOOD I JUST WANT TO EAT IT!1!!1!11!"

[MikeL]

Anonymous wrote:Can't you tease her? Make a little fun of her? just to make uncomfortable enough so that she may stop....

This is what I would do, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stick to drinks or coffee?

How much time does she spend photographing her food? I'd think like a few seconds, right? And then, how much time talking about or dissecting the meal?

Just tell her that you want to spend time catching up with her and not talking about the food. You can frame it in a positive way ...."I am really excited to hear about...(your new project, boyfriend, hobby, etc) so it doesn't sound like you are super annoyed with her behavior.

I'm guessing you've never had a meal with a "foodie" like this. My MIL gets into this sometimes. It takes her like 10 min to property setup her plate, remove background distractions from the view of the camera, keep checking the picture on her phone to see if she got it just right, and the uploading & writing the post. Sometimes she wants to do this with other people's food or with shared dishes as well. We're all supposed to just sit there and not eat until she's done. SUPER annoying. And the food discussion can take up the ENTIRE meal.

I feel your pain, OP. If you really like her and want to continue the friendship you need to either avoid eating together or be upfront with her about this. If she can't recognize this behavior is annoying to you and try to curb it, I wonder how good of a friend she is. All relationships are about compromise. You can tolerate some food talk and photographing of food and she should be able to keep it to a minimum and not post or be on her phone until you've parted ways.

You are right. I can't say I've ever had dinner with a foodie like this. I am amazed the food discussion can last the entire meal. Like, really? What are you all saying for an hour or more?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about the next time she suggests a fancy place just say something like, 'you know what, I'm in the mood for comfort food, how about we go to x diner' or something. A place that is not about the food so there won't be those 'new fancy restuarant' expectations on it.

Time to suggest Denny's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. She's like 10 years too late to this hobby.

Just make plans that don't involve food, OP.

When you're a foodie, every plan involves food in one way or another.

(I am not a foodie.)

Just for the record, people like this are not foodies. "Foodies" actually enjoy food and it's about dining and the experience. These people are insecure wanna-bes. Tell her that, OP.

[Anonymous]

You are correct, OP, if you want to remain friends, you have to deal with it.

[Anonymous]

I would go a step further than dealing and take control. Make sure you pick the restaurant next time. Make sure it interests you but is way out on a limb for your comfort zone. Then try to get in the swing of it and have some fun with the experience. Maybe it's just what she needs to be happy and it won't hurt you one bit. Surely not every meal in your week is spent with her? So if you know this is what makes her happy then, yes you should more than deal. Get onboard or go your separate ways.

[Anonymous]

This isn't recent but very interesting about what cells did to restaurant experiences

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2690490/Service-time-restaurants-doubled-past-ten-years-customers-cell-phones-blame-claims-busy-NYC-restaurant.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about the next time she suggests a fancy place just say something like, 'you know what, I'm in the mood for comfort food, how about we go to x diner' or something. A place that is not about the food so there won't be those 'new fancy restuarant' expectations on it.

+1

ITA. Nothing ruins a night out quicker than a pretentious self described foodie. The same one who pesters the waiter, has to change their order, make all sorts of demands, and order the most expensive wine on the menu. Which is fine - but not every single time!

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't really find this irritating.

Why don't you invite other friends to your usual favorite haunts, and keep her for new places?