Hearing impaired spouse taking a toll on our marriage...

[Anonymous]

Yes, I too have a hearing impaired husband and yes he irritates me but I try to be understanding. Since he takes good care of me, I strive to do the same.

Having a second living room and his own bedroom where he can watch tv on FULL BLAST with the doors closed helps. I also have a small whiteboard to write on so he can read what I say instead of repeating things loudly and sounding angry. He laughs about the board but it works.

[Anonymous]

People with hearing loss don't realize how socially isolating it can get. Over time others grow to hate trying to talk to them, so they talk to them less and less. It's definitely taking a toll on your marriage, OP, and I hope you can convince your husband to try some hearing aids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I too have a hearing impaired husband and yes he irritates me but I try to be understanding. Since he takes good care of me, I strive to do the same.

Having a second living room and his own bedroom where he can watch tv on FULL BLAST with the doors closed helps. I also have a small whiteboard to write on so he can read what I say instead of repeating things loudly and sounding angry. He laughs about the board but it works.

I'm hearing impaired. I wear wireless headphones to watch/listen to TV. Had to get the headphones when the neighbors started complaining.
LOL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone else have this? What are some issues that impact your day to day life? For me, it's the noises he makes but can't hear (clanking his silverware on plate, slurping noises, chewing gum noises, loud mouth breathing, stomping through the house, TV so loud I wear noise cancelling headphones...). I want to have empathy, but, wow, it's hard in the moment. I hardly talk anymore because repeating myself is just too much. Would love to hear your coping strategies. By the way, he has researched hearing aid, but until he finds the right ones, there won't be any.

My hearing cousin got her masters at a deaf college. Your complaints sound similar

[Anonymous]

OP, please post your marriage vows and I can then more particular advice.

[Anonymous]

It's incredibly tough - my parents went through this when my father lost his hearing in his 40s. Hearing loss is socially isolating, even more so, I've heard, than blindness. And it's so frustrating because my dad wouldn't admit his hearing loss and blamed us for mumbling. It got really bad and finally my dad got cochlear implants, which have helped a lot though it's far from perfect. Things that have helped: they also no longer vacation just as a couple, it is too lonely for my mom to have nobody to talk to so they go on tours/cruises. Being in the car with my dad is very difficult as he can't hear at all in that setting so my mom drives. They also go to Hearing Loss Association conferences which has been helpful in finding products that help and connecting them with a community.

[Anonymous]

I grew up with a dad with hearing loss. He was completely deaf in one ear and wore a hearing aid in the other. What really helped was when he took a lip reading course. So as long as I am looking directly at him, and get his attention first, he can understand me.

[Anonymous]

Where did he check out hearing aids? Give me your location and I'll tell you what place(s) that Checkbook.org recommend. My child wears hearing aids and I grew up in a household where my dad wore hearing aids. They have some great over-the-ear hearing aids that have a little tube that go into the ear. They are really hard to see.