What are your rules for your teen regarding dating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My two oldest are 21 and 24. I suppose they'd be considered late-bloomers. Neither had sex until they were in college. Both had significant others in high school though. We created rules as they were needed. If they wanted to go out with someone on a date, we needed to meet them. Nobody was allowed to pull into the driveway and honk their horn or text to come out - they needed to park and ring the doorbell. Your significant other may attend Sunday Dinner. They may NOT take you away from it.

Not allowed on the floor with the bedrooms, but I tried to keep the little kids out of the common areas when they had boyfriends/girlfriends over (my little kids could NOT plop down on the couch to watch a movie with the high school kids). Yes, hand-holding and kissing were allowed.

I had two kids as a teenager, and my kids have been subjected to a LOT of talks about relationships and sex and birth control, etc. They've had it pointed out that both if they are going to have sex and can't bring themselves to do it, I will get them condoms and birth control. However, if they don't have the maturity to get it themselves, they are not mature enough to be having sex and they should think about that, extensively. They've been given a lot of talks about what to expect from a boyfriend/girlfriend, and what they're obligated to give as one.

This always fascinates me. My upbringing was not at all prudish, but I never announced to my parents I was having sex. I'm always amazed by families where this occurs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nowadays, "dating" is a euphemism for sex. Very, very few teenagers are emotionally ready for such a relationship. So, no "dating" for my girls while they're under our roof.

I'm ready for more liberal parents to tell me what a square I am.

What do you base this statement on?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My two oldest are 21 and 24. I suppose they'd be considered late-bloomers. Neither had sex until they were in college. Both had significant others in high school though. We created rules as they were needed. If they wanted to go out with someone on a date, we needed to meet them. Nobody was allowed to pull into the driveway and honk their horn or text to come out - they needed to park and ring the doorbell. Your significant other may attend Sunday Dinner. They may NOT take you away from it.

Not allowed on the floor with the bedrooms, but I tried to keep the little kids out of the common areas when they had boyfriends/girlfriends over (my little kids could NOT plop down on the couch to watch a movie with the high school kids). Yes, hand-holding and kissing were allowed.

I had two kids as a teenager, and my kids have been subjected to a LOT of talks about relationships and sex and birth control, etc. They've had it pointed out that both if they are going to have sex and can't bring themselves to do it, I will get them condoms and birth control. However, if they don't have the maturity to get it themselves, they are not mature enough to be having sex and they should think about that, extensively. They've been given a lot of talks about what to expect from a boyfriend/girlfriend, and what they're obligated to give as one.

This always fascinates me. My upbringing was not at all prudish, but I never announced to my parents I was having sex. I'm always amazed by families where this occurs.

Ok. Lol, I don't know what to say. One called me the next morning, an one told me the next time we saw each other.

[Anonymous]

Try to limit it to fingering and hand jobs. I know its difficult but that is my best advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My two oldest are 21 and 24. I suppose they'd be considered late-bloomers. Neither had sex until they were in college. Both had significant others in high school though. We created rules as they were needed. If they wanted to go out with someone on a date, we needed to meet them. Nobody was allowed to pull into the driveway and honk their horn or text to come out - they needed to park and ring the doorbell. Your significant other may attend Sunday Dinner. They may NOT take you away from it.

Not allowed on the floor with the bedrooms, but I tried to keep the little kids out of the common areas when they had boyfriends/girlfriends over (my little kids could NOT plop down on the couch to watch a movie with the high school kids). Yes, hand-holding and kissing were allowed.

I had two kids as a teenager, and my kids have been subjected to a LOT of talks about relationships and sex and birth control, etc. They've had it pointed out that both if they are going to have sex and can't bring themselves to do it, I will get them condoms and birth control. However, if they don't have the maturity to get it themselves, they are not mature enough to be having sex and they should think about that, extensively. They've been given a lot of talks about what to expect from a boyfriend/girlfriend, and what they're obligated to give as one.

This always fascinates me. My upbringing was not at all prudish, but I never announced to my parents I was having sex. I'm always amazed by families where this occurs.

Ok. Lol, I don't know what to say. One called me the next morning, an one told me the next time we saw each other.

That's actually kind of cute and sweet!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try to limit it to fingering and hand jobs. I know its difficult but that is my best advice.

WTF

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try to limit it to fingering and hand jobs. I know its difficult but that is my best advice.

WTF

Not the PP, but that's good advice in some ways!

[Anonymous]

I think there is a middle ground and this is what we plan to do, and is what my parents did for me. I thought it was fine and have had no issues from it.

Dating in groups senior year (that didn't come up before senior year but junior/senior year seems reasonable) So if a group of us wanted to go to the movies, and there were couples, that was fine but no 1:1.
No boys upstairs
No boys in the home or me at a boys home unless parents were there
No dates during the week. No calls after 830 pm
Only 1 date/outing at night on the weekend (to discourage seriousness and encourage friends). So pick Friday or Saturday night but not both
There was a lot of discussion about not being emotionally mature enough to handle a serious relationship, that high school was time for friends of both sexes, the importance of school work and sports, clubs over activities and the general "you have a whole life to be in a romantic relationship, not when you are 15" kind of thing.
We hung out plenty with our little boyfriends at school, sports events, school activities and around town but never got into those serious 24/7 all encompassing serious relationships until college and after and I am grateful.

[Anonymous]

^^ meant No dating before senior year, just in groups