How do I nicely say no to this?

Anonymous
I'm the one who asked for more details. I hear you loud and clear. She's toxic.

Just say "I'm sorry I can't! Do you need any bibs? I'll send over a few ones to your sweet baby."
Anonymous
I'd probably be a beyotch and tell her you're having a flare up of your skin condition and you KNOW they don't want you around the baby with it
Anonymous
I would say something about being sick and not wanting to expose the baby to it. So sorry, hope you can get to a better place soon!
Anonymous
wow they sound terrible. You definitely don't have to go and you can give any reason you want, right up to telling them you don't like the way they treat you. I'd start with just say no, you aren't available without saying anything else. Is this a situation where you can just ignore the text or ignore it until tomorrow eve and pretend you just saw it?
Anonymous
I would just stick with what a pp suggested ""No, I have plans, sorry. Hope you're both well!"
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:wow they sound terrible. You definitely don't have to go and you can give any reason you want, right up to telling them you don't like the way they treat you. I'd start with just say no, you aren't available without saying anything else. Is this a situation where you can just ignore the text or ignore it until tomorrow eve and pretend you just saw it?


Don't "ignore" it, it will eat at you all day. Just tell her you can't make it. My doctor has a great sign up on one of the walls in his office. I took a picture of it to remind myself to make positive changes in my life.

The sign says- "Stress is what happens when your gut says, "No" and your mouth says, "Of course, I'd be happy to."

Good luck.
Anonymous
Don't hold a grudge. Let the baby be an excuse to have a better relationship. I think she's reaching out to you -- right?

Your brother was absolutely wrong to say what he did. But short of declaring all out war, let it go.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Why not just go? It's the nicer thing to do. It's just lunch. See your baby niece!


+1 If she doesn't usually extend an invitation, she may be lonely in the new days of motherhood or feels a new connection with you now. Or for sine reason she's making an effort. Plus...this is your baby niece! But obviously we don't know the back story.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why not just go? It's the nicer thing to do. It's just lunch. See your baby niece!


+1 If she doesn't usually extend an invitation, she may be lonely in the new days of motherhood or feels a new connection with you now. Or for sine reason she's making an effort. Plus...this is your baby niece! But obviously we don't know the back story.


Whoops, posted before reading further, sorry!!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why not just go? It's the nicer thing to do. It's just lunch. See your baby niece!


+1 If she doesn't usually extend an invitation, she may be lonely in the new days of motherhood or feels a new connection with you now. Or for sine reason she's making an effort. Plus...this is your baby niece! But obviously we don't know the back story.


Whoops, posted before reading further, sorry!!


PP again - just Sa you're not free. No explanation required. You need to take care of yourself right now
Anonymous
Op - It's doubly sad that you think "how you're going to say it" will mean anything.
Anonymous
Girl, just text back "Sorry I'm not free" and leave it at that.
Anonymous
Wait, your brother is pushing you to move back in with your parents? How does he have any say in that?

And then yes, just say you aren't available. "Sorry I have plans!". This is why texting is awesome, because brevity is expected. If she follows it up with "ok, when are you free?" just ignore that for awhile and think about how you want to respond.

Personally, I'd just go so I could see my new niece. But that's me and I don't have your history with these people.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Wait, your brother is pushing you to move back in with your parents? How does he have any say in that?

And then yes, just say you aren't available. "Sorry I have plans!". This is why texting is awesome, because brevity is expected. If she follows it up with "ok, when are you free?" just ignore that for awhile and think about how you want to respond.

Personally, I'd just go so I could see my new niece. But that's me and I don't have your history with these people.


After they told her they didn't want her around the baby because of a non-contagious skin condition? Just text her that you aren't free.

"Sorry, I can't make it".
Anonymous
You cant see the niece without the mom, so that's out. Commenting on your skin condition with regards tot he baby kinda ended getting together in my book. She just wants the dirt on your parents and giving it to her is not going to help anything. So you are not just busy, you are very busy. A polite use of the phrases above is best. No further explanation.
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