Baby Name Question, WWYD?

[Anonymous]

My FIL's name is Donald and we agreed per kids that we would not use it. I also don't like the name Donny. I also agree with other posters that I don't like when parent and child have the same first name.

I used to be a recruiter and I hated when I would call a house and ask for "James" and the person would stay Jimmy Sr. or Jimmy Jr? It's just so confusing. 2 of my cousins have the same name as their father and one grandfather and they stopped that trend with their kids.

I agree with others to pick a name you both love for the first and honor Grandpa with the middle name.

[Anonymous]

My husband was deadset on a name I hated for our son to honor a member of his family. We named our son that name and found a good nick name. Not only am I comfortable with the nickname but I now LOVE the name itself. I was classic name and it just grew on me once my son had it. Plus, I like the story behind it.

I like Donny.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Not to get off-track, but since you're asking for opinions and perhaps other options to consider, I want to toss out the name Donovan. For some reason I love it for a boy (if the last name fits), but I don't like the nickname Don or Donny. I also like Landon for a boy's name, and it could arguably be used to honor a FIL named Donald. Before anyone asks, yes, I am aware of Landon Donovan, the talented soccer player, and yes, I think he has a very cool name! As other PPs mentioned, it's important to agree on a name that both parents love...my husband rejected so many of the names I loved, but we ended up with a perfect name that suits our son very well. Best wishes!

[Anonymous]

I think it's a lovely sentiment to want to honor a family member by using their name for your child. But other than your son himself or his future wife, you will probably say his name more than any other human being on the planet, so I'd say make sure that you like it so you aren't cringing every day for the next 50 years!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to get off-track, but since you're asking for opinions and perhaps other options to consider, I want to toss out the name Donovan. For some reason I love it for a boy (if the last name fits), but I don't like the nickname Don or Donny. I also like Landon for a boy's name, and it could arguably be used to honor a FIL named Donald. Before anyone asks, yes, I am aware of Landon Donovan, the talented soccer player, and yes, I think he has a very cool name! As other PPs mentioned, it's important to agree on a name that both parents love...my husband rejected so many of the names I loved, but we ended up with a perfect name that suits our son very well. Best wishes!

I love the name Landon and the name Donovan. My husband thinks of the school Landon when I mention it. With Donovan he is convinced everyone will think we named the baby after Donovan McNabb which I think is ridiculous. The only other name DH will consider is Ryder after the golf tournament. My FIL loved golf and DH thinks his dad would have loved it. I think of Ryder trucks but I honestly would rather have a Ryder than a Donnie.

I loved naming our toddler. It was a piece of cake, I think we had the name selected before I was even in the 2nd trimester. This time around is so tough.

[Anonymous]

DS is a Donovan. He's 3 and I've only had one person ask, "Like Donovan McNabb?" and that person was from Philadelphia.

[Anonymous]

It was very nice of you to offer to honor your FIL. Now for your husband to want to call your baby your FIL's name when you don't like it, is not appropriate (IMO) - especially since he did not even think of it in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It was very nice of you to offer to honor your FIL. Now for your husband to want to call your baby your FIL's name when you don't like it, is not appropriate (IMO) - especially since he did not even think of it in the first place.

He knows I'm not a fan of Donny/Donnie but how do you tell your husband that you hate your recently deceased FIL's name.

"Honey, I love you and I miss your father but I hate his name." I keep suggesting other names and telling him I am not a fan of Donny but he's pretty stuck on it. Bleh.

[Anonymous]

I think its tough, but definitely agree that you should find a name or nickname (whether it is based on 1st or middle name) that you both like. My father passed away a couple years ago and we are now having our first child....a son. We are using my dad's name for the middle name and its important to me that we do, but we haven't even considered calling our son by that name. (We do both actually like the name, though, which helps).

I'm sure its tough for your husband, but it sounds like he's being a little insistent on choosing both the 1st, middle and the name your son is called. That's just not fair to you and I do think its appropriate for you to stand up for what you want so that you are both happy with the final decision. If the situation was reversed he likely wouldn't be ok with you choosing the name of the child all on your own even if he didn't like it.

Just my opinion, but good luck and congratulations!

[Anonymous]

"Honey, I love you and I miss your father but I hate his name."

Yeah, tat's pretty much exactly what I'd say. I mean, I'd probably say, I "don't like" the name instead of "hate," but same difference. If you don't tell him you don't like the name, of course he's going to keep suggesting it! Can you really not be honest with him about this?

[Anonymous]

I meant "that" instead of "tat."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

"Honey, I love you and I miss your father but I hate his name."

Yeah, tat's pretty much exactly what I'd say. I mean, I'd probably say, I "don't like" the name instead of "hate," but same difference. If you don't tell him you don't like the name, of course he's going to keep suggesting it! Can you really not be honest with him about this?

I can be honest and I have been, I just feel so bad. He loved/loves his dad and it would just mean so much to him. I'm not sure which is worse, denying him the chance to honor his father or dealing with a name I don't care for.

[Anonymous]

You are not denying him the chance to honor his father by not agreeing to call your son by the middle name. It sounds like you had previously agreed that Donald would be the middle name and you'd choose a different first name that you both liked. But then your husband refused to participate in picking a first name (another issue....) so you suggested his first name, which he agreed to but only if you call the child by the middle name. Sorry, that's not right. You will use this name day in and day out so you need to like it. Having Donald as a middle name is honoring your FIL, even if that's not the name that you call the child. I think you should pick a mutually-agreeable first name that your husband would be willing to call your son, and use Donald as the middle name. That way you have options. You may see your son and think yes, Donny is right. Or maybe not. But your husband right now is dictating the choice by 1) refusing to call the child by his name, which would be the first name (which I do understand) and 2) holding you to Donald as the middle name. Sorry if this comes across as too opinionated, but I've been reading along and it seems to me that your husband is being demanding and unfair, and making you feel guilty to do it.

[Anonymous]

I agree w/ 4/22 18:48. I go by my middle name and it's always complicated things!

[Anonymous]

I agree you should use one of the other names you really like as a first name, use Donald as the middle name, and call the child by the first name (the one you both like). You should not name a child something you don't like.

My daughter recently asked me why I chose her name and I told her "because I thought it was my most favorite name in the whole world" and I feel the same way about the name I chose for my son. You should be able to say that to your child as well.