What do you consider immature for kindergarten?

[Anonymous]

Hmm. My son could sit, listen to stories, follow the teacher's instructions, not hit or push, but he was still immature for K. He could not handle conflicts with friends, deal with kids who were not nice, or losing at sports and spent a lot of K crying and being upset.


A good K. teacher would work with him as you should work with him at home. That's part of learning and going to school. That is not immature as that is reasonable for a 4 year old. People are expecting 5 year olds to be mini-adults.

Of course we worked with him, as did his teacher. I also volunteered in his class once a week, and none of the other kids seemed to be having the issues he did, to the degree he did, with regularity. He's emotionally immature relative to his peers. While that doesn't make him a bad kid, its not a good situation for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL! My oldest was never ready then.

There are plenty I saw in kindergarten who detracted from the class in a way that hindered the learning of others. In my opinion, those kids were immature for kindergarten. They may belong in it ageowise or knowledgewise, but perhaps not maturity wise. The kid who knew her colors in my DD's kindergarten class but could not stop touching my DD's barrettes, thighs, shoes, head, ponytail, etc., who could not stop getting her snack whenever she wanted, could not stop talking when the teacher asked her not to, and could not follow simple directions (I.e. "Time to leave art now, please line up." And the kid was ignoring the teacher, taking the paint out again and getting new paper because she didn't want to leave art.). Kid is not mature enough for kindergarten.

Part of your DD's educational experience should be (and is) learning how to deal with an environment that may not always be completely calm and easy for everyone, and how to negotiate social situations with peers, including those more socially mature with good behaviors and those with behavioral issues who are less mature. Seeing other children and their faults/how the teacher handles issues is a crucial part of the learning process for social situations for children. Humans learn vicariously through others' interactions and kindergarteners shouldn't be shielded from non-dangerous but annoying behaviors like the ones you described.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL! My oldest was never ready then.

There are plenty I saw in kindergarten who detracted from the class in a way that hindered the learning of others. In my opinion, those kids were immature for kindergarten. They may belong in it ageowise or knowledgewise, but perhaps not maturity wise. The kid who knew her colors in my DD's kindergarten class but could not stop touching my DD's barrettes, thighs, shoes, head, ponytail, etc., who could not stop getting her snack whenever she wanted, could not stop talking when the teacher asked her not to, and could not follow simple directions (I.e. "Time to leave art now, please line up." And the kid was ignoring the teacher, taking the paint out again and getting new paper because she didn't want to leave art.). Kid is not mature enough for kindergarten.

The point is, that will always be the case. Early intervention doesn't catch every kid with developmental or learning issues, and keeping those kids at home doesn't help. K is where a lot of this begins to get sorted out.

You have to wonder about the parents who do not see the needs or even better the preschool teachers, doctors and others who have contact. Though its pretty common for parents to ignore many things.

[Anonymous]

A crier and a pants-wetter. Those two say to me "I'm too immature to be here."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL! My oldest was never ready then.

There are plenty I saw in kindergarten who detracted from the class in a way that hindered the learning of others. In my opinion, those kids were immature for kindergarten. They may belong in it ageowise or knowledgewise, but perhaps not maturity wise. The kid who knew her colors in my DD's kindergarten class but could not stop touching my DD's barrettes, thighs, shoes, head, ponytail, etc., who could not stop getting her snack whenever she wanted, could not stop talking when the teacher asked her not to, and could not follow simple directions (I.e. "Time to leave art now, please line up." And the kid was ignoring the teacher, taking the paint out again and getting new paper because she didn't want to leave art.). Kid is not mature enough for kindergarten.

Part of your DD's educational experience should be (and is) learning how to deal with an environment that may not always be completely calm and easy for everyone, and how to negotiate social situations with peers, including those more socially mature with good behaviors and those with behavioral issues who are less mature. Seeing other children and their faults/how the teacher handles issues is a crucial part of the learning process for social situations for children. Humans learn vicariously through others' interactions and kindergarteners shouldn't be shielded from non-dangerous but annoying behaviors like the ones you described.

I haveno issue with my kid learning to navigate with situations that aren't also calm and easy. I do object to so done touching her thighs, head, and hair multiple times each day, for extended periods each time. Think of someone putting your hands on your thighs and hair during the entire time kids were on the carpet. If she moved from my kid (was separated from her) then on her way to the bathroom, lining up, etc., she still touched her. I'm sure it was a sensory thing plus a boundary thing. Inappropriate and don't feel my 5 year old need to just learn to live with it.

[Anonymous]

I agree with you, pp. Your daughter should not have to deal with another child constantly touching her. Did it ever get better during the school year? Did the teacher address it? Was this child only doing this to your dd or other kids too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with you, pp. Your daughter should not have to deal with another child constantly touching her. Did it ever get better during the school year? Did the teacher address it? Was this child only doing this to your dd or other kids too?

It was occasionally other kids, but always my kid year round. She has never been out in her class again.

[Anonymous]

I have a rising 1st grader who is on the lower side of average for maturity for her age. Not about to hold her back for that. I wouldn't skip her ahead for being more mature than her peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think by kindergarten a child should

Know colors and shapes

Recognize letters and numbers

Write his name

Be able to sit and follow directions

Converse well with peers and adults

Dress himself

Feed himself

Say please and thank you unprompted

Share when appropriate

Clean up after himself

Display empathy and care for others (should be at the top of the list probably)

So, a child with basic speech, fine or gross motor skills should wait till someone decides they are ready. Makes no sense - I would say basic reading and math prior to K.

Huh? I don't know what you mean. I know lots of children who are ready for K but not reading yet in any meaningful way. My oldest child read as a young four yr old, but plenty of her friends started reading during K or even the summer after, and they were still mature enough to be there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think by kindergarten a child should

Know colors and shapes

Recognize letters and numbers

Write his name

Be able to sit and follow directions

Converse well with peers and adults

Dress himself

Feed himself

Say please and thank you unprompted

Share when appropriate

Clean up after himself

Display empathy and care for others (should be at the top of the list probably)

So, a child with basic speech, fine or gross motor skills should wait till someone decides they are ready. Makes no sense - I would say basic reading and math prior to K.

Huh? I don't know what you mean. I know lots of children who are ready for K but not reading yet in any meaningful way. My oldest child read as a young four yr old, but plenty of her friends started reading during K or even the summer after, and they were still mature enough to be there.

If one is so worried about maturity they should be equal in all areas to the other kids, not just social. A lot of kids are going in partly reading to fully reading and doing basic math. Kids should have academic exposure and not hold the other kids back academically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think by kindergarten a child should

Know colors and shapes

Recognize letters and numbers

Write his name

Be able to sit and follow directions

Converse well with peers and adults

Dress himself

Feed himself

Say please and thank you unprompted

Share when appropriate

Clean up after himself

Display empathy and care for others (should be at the top of the list probably)

So, a child with basic speech, fine or gross motor skills should wait till someone decides they are ready. Makes no sense - I would say basic reading and math prior to K.

Huh? I don't know what you mean. I know lots of children who are ready for K but not reading yet in any meaningful way. My oldest child read as a young four yr old, but plenty of her friends started reading during K or even the summer after, and they were still mature enough to be there.

If one is so worried about maturity they should be equal in all areas to the other kids, not just social. A lot of kids are going in partly reading to fully reading and doing basic math. Kids should have academic exposure and not hold the other kids back academically.

Children who have more to learn academically really don't hold their peers back at that age as much as children who have more to learn emotionally. The latter are way more disruptive to classroom time and energy.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately behaving in an age appropriate way for a five year old, especially boys, is considered too immature for today's kindergarten.

As hard as it is for boys, it must be even more difficult for the random girl who is a little less mature. Moms of well behaved girls are generally so judgemental of others who are not as smart/pretty/well behaved as their own daughters. I really feel for the less mature girls even more than the boys. At least the boys have a sizeable peer group behaving just as naughty or spirited as the next boy.

[Anonymous]

Well. You legally have to be there at a certain point. What would you plan to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately behaving in an age appropriate way for a five year old, especially boys, is considered too immature for today's kindergarten.

As hard as it is for boys, it must be even more difficult for the random girl who is a little less mature. Moms of well behaved girls are generally so judgemental of others who are not as smart/pretty/well behaved as their own daughters. I really feel for the less mature girls even more than the boys. At least the boys have a sizeable peer group behaving just as naughty or spirited as the next boy.

Both my kids acted appropriately in kindergarten. The majority of kids do, regardless of sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A crier and a pants-wetter. Those two say to me "I'm too immature to be here."

My extremely intelligent child cried throughout K. She was the top of the class in reading/math/spelling. Should I have held her back another year?