Parenting question about alcohol...

[Anonymous]

No alcohol til 21. Most emerging studies show allowing sips at home increases the likelihood of problems down the road.

http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/31/living/feat-sipping-alcohol-kids-drinking-impact-parents/

http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles/0390-answering-questions-about-underage-drinking

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/42807670/ns/health-childrens_health/t/letting-teen-drink-under-parents-watch-backfires/#.VbOXXPlViko

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No alcohol til 21. Most emerging studies show allowing sips at home increases the likelihood of problems down the road.

http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/31/living/feat-sipping-alcohol-kids-drinking-impact-parents/

http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles/0390-answering-questions-about-underage-drinking

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/42807670/ns/health-childrens_health/t/letting-teen-drink-under-parents-watch-backfires/#.VbOXXPlViko

Most of the PPs were referring to young children (OP's kid is 6). Only your first link is directly relevant - the other two refer to supervised drinking of teenagers in the home - a whole different kettle of fish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a contrary opinion, we were told at the alcohol and drug seminars at our kids' schools to not allow kids to try alcohol at home when they are young. The educators leading the seminar said that research shows that the longer you delay the first sip of alcohol, the first time a kid tries drugs, and the first time they have sex, the healthier they will be as adults.

Obviously, people have been plenty of evidence to the contrary but we've followed that advice about not giving sips of alcohol at home and our teens have not been wild -- at least not yet! (This was also the rule in my house growing up and I didn't have any trouble in college or beyond with alcohol.)

I think you misunderstood "try" alcohol at home as actually drink, not have a taste.

Sure the longer you delay actual drinking the better, having a taste does not count as drinking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a contrary opinion, we were told at the alcohol and drug seminars at our kids' schools to not allow kids to try alcohol at home when they are young. The educators leading the seminar said that research shows that the longer you delay the first sip of alcohol, the first time a kid tries drugs, and the first time they have sex, the healthier they will be as adults.

Obviously, people have been plenty of evidence to the contrary but we've followed that advice about not giving sips of alcohol at home and our teens have not been wild -- at least not yet! (This was also the rule in my house growing up and I didn't have any trouble in college or beyond with alcohol.)

I think you misunderstood "try" alcohol at home as actually drink, not have a taste.

Sure the longer you delay actual drinking the better, having a taste does not count as drinking.

No, I didn't misunderstand -- parents providing tastes or sips of alcohol to children is linked with unhealthy drinking in teens. See the CNN link provided by another pp. Also, I'm not naive enough to think that my kids won't ever drink as teens, especially when they go to college. I'm saying that we won't provide any alcohol to our children until they are 21 and we tell them that we hope they do not drink until they are at least out of high school.

[Anonymous]

My parents similarly never drank or went anywhere where there was alcohol. It was simply absent from my childhood. I tried wine abroad where it was legal to do so and then began drinking in moderation here after I turned 21.

I thought giving my then-young children a sip of wine when they asked would cure them of their interest, but my 3yo liked it Given the current research, we're holding the when-it's-legal line. They, of course, have a blanket call-us-for-any-hint-of-trouble rule, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents similarly never drank or went anywhere where there was alcohol. It was simply absent from my childhood. I tried wine abroad where it was legal to do so and then began drinking in moderation here after I turned 21.

I thought giving my then-young children a sip of wine when they asked would cure them of their interest, but my 3yo liked it Given the current research, we're holding the when-it's-legal line. They, of course, have a blanket call-us-for-any-hint-of-trouble rule, too.

But it is legal. Parents may permit their own child under age 21 to drink in their own home in MD and VA, and in other places as well in other states. We do allow our kids to drink under our supervision under legal circumstances. Sips of our drinks when they're young, a few sips of their own glass for toasts at important family events when they're a bit older, up to half a glass with a meal for my tweens, and up to one glass with food for the teens.

[Anonymous]

When my DD was 6 I just said no. It's the same as coffee or diet coke. You can tell your first grader no, some things are for grown ups. If my kid was 14, I might allow a sip. I don't know yet, we aren't quite there yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One consideration. Are your parents teetotalers only because they disapprove of alcohol or are they teetotalers because their parents were drunks? Sounds from your post like it's the former but if it's the latter then your kids might be at risk for addiction because of their genetic heritage. That doesn't mean you shouldn't let them drink, just that you should make them aware of the family history and that they need to monitor their use.

+1 I was thinking the same thing. My parents never drank because both had parents who were alcoholics. They never forbid my brother and I from drinking and they always provided alcoholic beverages for guests, but they were very blunt and honest about the stories they told us and made it clear that alcoholism is a disease, it can ruin people and it runs in our family. I enjoy a drink here and there but I drink responsibly and always have because the clear messages they sent both my brother and myself about alcoholism from a very young age definitely stuck with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a contrary opinion, we were told at the alcohol and drug seminars at our kids' schools to not allow kids to try alcohol at home when they are young. The educators leading the seminar said that research shows that the longer you delay the first sip of alcohol, the first time a kid tries drugs, and the first time they have sex, the healthier they will be as adults.

Obviously, people have been plenty of evidence to the contrary but we've followed that advice about not giving sips of alcohol at home and our teens have not been wild -- at least not yet! (This was also the rule in my house growing up and I didn't have any trouble in college or beyond with alcohol.)

That sounds incredibly naive...do you know for sure your teens haven't had sex, tried pot etc just because you haven't let them have a sip of wine?? This is the same argument as teach abstinence, kids won't have sex. If that worked, the U.S would have a much smaller percentage of teen pregnancy than Western Europe where they have comprehensive sex education and diluted wine with dinner. Also, if this worked fewer American teens would die in alcohol induced car accidents...but hey, just because it worked for you and maybe for your kids, you must be right.

Agreed. This sounds soooo bogus: "research shows." Yeah, right. What peer-reviewed research shows this?

[Anonymous]

I grew up in an environment like the pp whose bf owns bars. I was allowed sips when I was little, and a small glass for holidays when I was a teen. My parents tried to normalize alcohol for us. Now, two of the three of us kids are in recovery and the third should be. So, there's that anecdote.

We don't drink, so our kids don't see it regularly. I do serve it at parties and just say it's a grown-up drink, like coffee. I also tell them too much will make them really really sick, even when they are grown.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a contrary opinion, we were told at the alcohol and drug seminars at our kids' schools to not allow kids to try alcohol at home when they are young. The educators leading the seminar said that research shows that the longer you delay the first sip of alcohol, the first time a kid tries drugs, and the first time they have sex, the healthier they will be as adults.

Obviously, people have been plenty of evidence to the contrary but we've followed that advice about not giving sips of alcohol at home and our teens have not been wild -- at least not yet! (This was also the rule in my house growing up and I didn't have any trouble in college or beyond with alcohol.)

Agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No alcohol til 21. Most emerging studies show allowing sips at home increases the likelihood of problems down the road.

http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/31/living/feat-sipping-alcohol-kids-drinking-impact-parents/

http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles/0390-answering-questions-about-underage-drinking

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/42807670/ns/health-childrens_health/t/letting-teen-drink-under-parents-watch-backfires/#.VbOXXPlViko

Thank you. This is good to know.

[Anonymous]

I don't give my early teens sips of alcohol but they do see us drinking at home socially and in reasonable and small amounts. I think they understand it's something they will do, but also not now since they aren't 21. However, we have stopped drinking and driving. Honestly, we used to all go to dinner and each have a glass or wine or a beer and then drive home and that is the wrong message. We now have a zero tolerance for even a glass of wine and driving so that they can see that there has to be a designated driver at all times

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a contrary opinion, we were told at the alcohol and drug seminars at our kids' schools to not allow kids to try alcohol at home when they are young. The educators leading the seminar said that research shows that the longer you delay the first sip of alcohol, the first time a kid tries drugs, and the first time they have sex, the healthier they will be as adults.

Obviously, people have been plenty of evidence to the contrary but we've followed that advice about not giving sips of alcohol at home and our teens have not been wild -- at least not yet! (This was also the rule in my house growing up and I didn't have any trouble in college or beyond with alcohol.)

I think that's not true at all. I think parents should model healthy alcohol use. Ie 1-2 glasses of wine with nice dinners, on fancy occasions or religious holidays. You don't want a kid's first exposure to be a high school party where everyone is drinking 6 glasses of jungle juice made with 151 and Kool-aid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a contrary opinion, we were told at the alcohol and drug seminars at our kids' schools to not allow kids to try alcohol at home when they are young. The educators leading the seminar said that research shows that the longer you delay the first sip of alcohol, the first time a kid tries drugs, and the first time they have sex, the healthier they will be as adults.

Obviously, people have been plenty of evidence to the contrary but we've followed that advice about not giving sips of alcohol at home and our teens have not been wild -- at least not yet! (This was also the rule in my house growing up and I didn't have any trouble in college or beyond with alcohol.)

I think you misunderstood "try" alcohol at home as actually drink, not have a taste.

Sure the longer you delay actual drinking the better, having a taste does not count as drinking.

No, I didn't misunderstand -- parents providing tastes or sips of alcohol to children is linked with unhealthy drinking in teens. See the CNN link provided by another pp. Also, I'm not naive enough to think that my kids won't ever drink as teens, especially when they go to college. I'm saying that we won't provide any alcohol to our children until they are 21 and we tell them that we hope they do not drink until they are at least out of high school.

funny. Doesn't seem to be the case with European kids.