What does this say about me and my marriage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, people are different. Some enjoy vacationing without spouses, some don't. Your friend is a bit narrow-minded.

Your marriage doesn't have to work for anyone but you. Enjoy your trip!

+1 As long as you and you H are fine with this arrangement that's all that counts.

[Anonymous]

Your friend is a dumba**. I love my wife dearly but I am also a separate person and have separate interests. I love getting out in the outdoors and camping and roughing it with cold, rain, misery, etc. It recharges my batteries. My wife likes other things, like art and farmers markets and massages. I love taking trips together but also respect that we are different people and can take trips apart. "Conventional" ideas are usually full of s**t and limiting and you should create your own reality and damn what other people do. If it works for you and your DH, then so be it. You are not Siamese twins once you marry, you remain separate human beings. Do what works for you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It says you have a strong marriage in which you are both individuals with interests and independence. Your friend on the other hand is a co- dependent who can't get along without her husband. Feel sorry for her.

+1

I really think part of what some marriages fall apart is a lack of independence.

[Anonymous]

My husband doesn't dance or sing . I shouldn't ?

My husband doesn't eat chocolate or drink wine. I shouldn't ?

My husband goes to bed early. I should too ?

My husband doesn't go barefoot. I shouldn't ?

So silly. You are your own person. Do whatever you want. Marriage isn't prison.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Been married 25 years, 2 kids one in college one going. I recently took a trip by myself (6 days) and had such an amazing time. I didn't' expect to enjoy it as much as I did. I have always dreamed of going to Europe alone for 2-3 weeks and just going everywhere I want to go, hitting art shows and antique fairs (stuff my H does not enjoy) and really thinking of just doing it. When I told a friend she was shocked and said "why are you married then".

Admittedly it got me thinking......what does that say about me and my marriage? Is it so abnormal to not only do this but WANT to do this?

I can see my myself being where you are in about 10 years. I love DH and he loves me and we get along in other areas, but I plan to travel and do stuff with or without him...we just have different interests. That's ok. Good for you for doing things you love!

[Anonymous]

I went on vacation by myself recently and it was really great. My husband didn't mind bc the itinerary didn't appeal to him. Your husband's opinion is the only one you should consider on the matter.

[Anonymous]

It's not you, it's your friend. Something is going on in her life. Carry on.

[Anonymous]

My husband just took a 3 week trip to Europe alone. His family was shocked. I received a lot of calls and texts, "Is everything okay?" My marriage is fine, the opportunity presented itself, and he was off.

We laughed about how hard his family took it. They thought he was very selfish. Whatever, we aren't wasting our energy on entertaining their insecurities.

[Anonymous]

It means your man does not feel threatened by your independence. Are you?

[Anonymous]

I think a lot of your freedom reaction was due to the fact that now after all these years being tied down w/the responsibilities of parenthood, you got a chance to just do something nice for YOU. It could have been a breath of fresh air altogether.

Who wouldn't be so excited to have all of that freedom to yourself after years of motherhood?

Plus, you have been married a long time, sometimes people just need a respite every now + then from their spouses. It is only normal and natural to want this from time to time, it certainly does not mean you are unhappy in your marriage and should consider leaving your hubby.

[Anonymous]

My DH likes to go to S. America for vacations. I don't. I prefer going to Asia. We take separate vacations sometimes and always have. It's not a big deal.

Just bc you are married does not mean you are Siamese twins.

[Anonymous]

I went to Bolivia with my friend and not
My dh. I do solo soujourns to U.S. cities by myself
All the time. My relationship with DH is strong

[Anonymous]

Amazing. It says you are fine.

I literally go home for lunch every day alone. I walk the dog, and spend 45 minutes sitting in silence in my own home. It's one of the nicest parts of my day. We all need alone time, OP.

[Anonymous]

I would say it means you have a healthy marriage. You don't need to be co-dependent to have a good marriage. I actually worry more about those people.

[Anonymous]

Op, nothing odd at all. You go girl! Now, a question - Do each of you get to enjoy this kind of expenditure? You aren't being selfish, are you? Does your husband get to enjoy this much freedom from working?