Confusion

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was depressed, I never felt sad. I did feel tired and blank. I could laugh when I was with friends or watching something on TV. But the joy never went into my soul. It was just an surface feeling.

Please a a therapist and a medical doctor. You may not need a therapist, but you don't know until you've gone to a few sessions. If the therapist thinks the depression is just brain chemical, then you can stop.

As for meds. Many people just see their GP. And try an initial drug they recommend. But for most people, the first drug doesn't work. If that happens to you, please see a professional like a psychiatrist that understand psych drugs better.

I would also read Dr Daniel Amen's book on depression. It can point you to the best drugs to use based on your symptoms.

You've described pretty closely how I feel. How did you get over it? Or did you even get over it? In my experience I'd have a hard time remembering ever feeling happy, and when I laugh it's genuine but on the surface. Like the OP or one if the PP (not sure) it seems to be more the norm these days that I feel numb inside or just dead inside. Did you really get over it? I can't imagine anything fixing this. Thanks you in advance.

[Anonymous]

You sound very depressed to me.

And that is nothing to be ashamed of. As people get older, depression can manifest itself big time.

Reading your posting makes me pretty sure that is what you are suffering from.

Can you at least talk to your medical Dr. and see if he can prescribe some anti-depressant medication(s) until you can see someone else?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was depressed, I never felt sad. I did feel tired and blank. I could laugh when I was with friends or watching something on TV. But the joy never went into my soul. It was just an surface feeling.

Please a a therapist and a medical doctor. You may not need a therapist, but you don't know until you've gone to a few sessions. If the therapist thinks the depression is just brain chemical, then you can stop.

As for meds. Many people just see their GP. And try an initial drug they recommend. But for most people, the first drug doesn't work. If that happens to you, please see a professional like a psychiatrist that understand psych drugs better.

I would also read Dr Daniel Amen's book on depression. It can point you to the best drugs to use based on your symptoms.

You've described pretty closely how I feel. How did you get over it? Or did you even get over it? In my experience I'd have a hard time remembering ever feeling happy, and when I laugh it's genuine but on the surface. Like the OP or one if the PP (not sure) it seems to be more the norm these days that I feel numb inside or just dead inside. Did you really get over it? I can't imagine anything fixing this. Thanks you in advance.

I had Dysthymia, which is mild form of depression where you just feel blah all.the.time. From the outside you look fine, but the inside you are just blah. Then I would have bouts of Depression where I would have sleep and concentration issue (manageable ADD turned into unmanageable ADD) , no energy and would want to crawl into a little hole. Then throw a little Generalized Anxiety into the mix--yeah my 20's were a lot of fun.

Part of it was just general 20's "who am I and where do I fit in the world?" I did some spiritual searching (read A Return to Love) and becoming comfortable with who I am (vs. who I want to be). I did take some drugs (Paxil) and went to therapy for a few years.

Then in my 30's I found a job that I loved, but was a horrible match for my personality. I started taking ADD drugs which made my depression worse, but I had no idea I was depressed (I have Atypical Depression, look it up). So my ADD symptoms got worse, so I took more ADD meds, which made my depression worse. I ended up with a full blown "nervous breakdown" and suicidal--MAJOR, MAJOR depression. I couldn't work and lost contact with all my friends. Only reason I didn't starve to death was I was living with my parents.

So I went to the Amen Clinic (offices in CA and Reston VA) and did a brain scan. Found out I should be on Effexor, but heard bad things about it, so I took another med. Which was a total waste of year of my life since it only worked marginally. I finally said okay to Effexor, Wellbutrin and a Mood Stabilizer (Lamictil) even though I'm not bi-polar. Took me years to get my life back on track. But after that, it was like my brain was re-booted. I have moments where I feel the depression when I take certain meds, but overall no depression or anxiety.

I don't think you will go down the road I did. I do think you can get better with the right therapy and the right meds. I highly recommend reading Dr. Daniel Amen's depression and anxiety book because it will help you figure out the best medication. Most doctors just start you with the one they are most comfortable with then you play the spinning wheel of "let's try this drug" until you find one that works for you. If you can go to their office, the PsyDocs there are really good, but they don't take insurance.

Good Luck!