Should we move to a less exciting city to be closer to family?

[Anonymous]

Honestly, OP if you have to ask, then maybe the family factor isn't important enough to you to outweigh the benefits of living in DC. I say that as someone who is planning to move back to my deep south, way less progressive hometown very soon now that I've had a baby. It's just so obvious to me now how much I miss my family and how important it is to me to have my DS grow up around with family and in the same culture I grew up in. Point being, if you're hesitating enough to pose the question to DCUM, then maybe Dallas really isn't for you.

[Anonymous]

Where is your husband from? Be sure to consider how well he'd adapt.

I moved to be closer to family after we had our first child. The first year was a big adjustment. But, after that, I really loved the pace of life, loved getting out of the DC bubble and reconnecting with "normal" people, and really appreciated how I saw friends and family almost daily with minimal effort.

The problem was that my husband never fully made the transition -- and we stayed 4 yars. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy the city and he did meet plenty of "like-minded" friends. He just preferred DC. So now we're back.

I'm not sorry we moved. I'm not sorry we moved back. We had 4 great years, and there is now a strong bond between my family and our DC. I don't think that would have happened if we hadn't spent that time. Good luck making your choice.

[Anonymous]

My husband does a lot of business in Dallas and it's somewhere we might live eventually. It's a city not a tiny town-there are great restaurants and no not just tex mex although tex mex is great!! There are beautiful suburbs and also museums and nightlife. As for politics--I never got into discussing my politics until I moved to DC --you may find that you can make friends without going there and wouldn't that be a nice change because It think the liberal vs. conservative thing is really getting old.

[Anonymous]

Been there, done that, came back to DC! Raised in Texas, too. It's no longer the place for us. The much lower cost of living is certainly appealing, though. Good luck with your decision, OP.

[zumbamama]

I moved to DC to be near family even though part of me didn't want to. I LOVED living in Socal, but as my family grew (3 kids) so did exhaustion and expenses. Moving close to family makes life, at least for us, a million times easier and more fulfilling.

I don't have the beach down the street anymore, but my kids KNOW their grandparents, great-grandparents and all their cousins, aunts, uncles. I hate the cold weather here, but there's always an extra pair of eyes to watch my kids, always someone to help with anything I need. If my car breaks down, there's one to borrow. We eat at each other's places all the time which relieves cooking duty frequently. And In turn, they are getting older and appreciate our help with things they can't do anymore. And if anything should happen to them, I'm glad I will be here for them.

There's pros/cons to living in either place, but having a strong relationship with extended family is great for the kids. Plus the place you leave behind makes for a nice vacation destination. And who knows, maybe your path will not stop in Dallas.

[Anonymous]

I would move. I also live far away from family right now, and if I had a chance to move closer I would move in a heartbeat. My only thing is that my husband wouldn't be able to seriously downgrade his job if we did, so we're here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would move. I also live far away from family right now, and if I had a chance to move closer I would move in a heartbeat. My only thing is that my husband wouldn't be able to seriously downgrade his job if we did, so we're here.

I mean my husband would need to seriously downgrada...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would move. I also live far away from family right now, and if I had a chance to move closer I would move in a heartbeat. My only thing is that my husband wouldn't be able to seriously downgrade his job if we did, so we're here.

I mean my husband would need to seriously downgrada...

&#$^#*Q don't know what's wrong with me today! 'downgrade'

[Anonymous]

Both DH & my family live here. I would NOT move away from our famies-no way. My son has all his cousins and we have an endless supply of grandparents who trip over each other to watch him (and he even has his own room at grandma's). I don't see what is sooo great about DC that would make one want to stay here. It certainly has worn off on me (but maybe that is because I've lived here my whole life). If my family were not here, I'm not so sure I'd be terribly impressed. Hmmm, smithsonian or being able to spend time with family...not really a hard choice.

[JenD]

If your family in TX are kid-friendly, I would definitely do it. You can't underestimate how important a support system can be if times ever get tough. So many of us are learning that nowadays

Maybe you can rent instead of selling, make a three year plan, go to TX, and then come back if you don't like it?

[Anonymous]

One thing to consider: Texas is as big as five mid-Atlantic states put together. If you want a weekend away, you pretty much have to fly. That's pretty different from here -- where you can be on the Chesapeake one weekend, ski-ing the next, and seeing a Broadway show the next.

[Anonymous]

I'm an East Coaster, born and bred, but not a Washingtonian and I wish very much that we could live near extended family. My kids (oldest now in high school) really love to be with their cousins and aunts and uncles. In fact, as kids get older, the benefits of having extended family nearby may even be greater than when your kids are little and you appreciate the back-up babysitting. An aunt or uncle can give a teen advice that the teen might not want to hear from a parent.

I've been to Dallas on business and always enjoy it. The local folks I work with are politically active, liberal environmentalists and urban planners. The DFW art museum is fabulous, and the area around SMU has a great, urban vibe -interesting stores and restaurants, but easy to get around. If I were you, OP, I'd give it a try.

[Anonymous]

OP, think hard about how much you hate driving. Do you hate it within the normal range, or do your *REALLY, REALLY, HATE IT*? If you are in the latter category, Dallas is just not for you.

I personally would find living in the outer burbs and driving every day an incredible hardship. It might make me lose my mind. It is for you to decide just what kid of hardship that change would mean for you.

[Anonymous]

I don't know much about Dallas but I'm guessing that there might be some places you would enjoy living that would not be considered the "normal" place to live for middle class white people (Assuming you're white. Sorry for the assumption if you're not!). You might be unhappy if you move to Dallas and just move to a conventional suburb because that is what is expected of you. I suggest you look around the city carefully (and don't rely on family recommendations) and see if there is a neighborhood you would enjoy.

I say this because I used to work in Richmond. Generally the Richmond area is very conservative but within the city there seemed to be some pretty hip places to live. You could make a life for yourself there if you decided to blaze your own path. I'm guessing it's possible in Dallas, too.

Good luck, OP!