Issue with church being a little too welcoming - in Diocese of Arlington

[Anonymous]

I', Catholic and I have lived in 4 large cities. This being "OOB" and "IB" for a Catholic Diocese is new to me. Is this specific to Diocese of Arlington? I live in Ashburn but I am a member of a church in DC. I know the Diocese of Washington don't have these rules.

[Anonymous]

*doesn't have

[Anonymous]

I'm not a catholic, but was curious. Churches track donations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not a catholic, but was curious. Churches track donations?

+1 Wha? Lifelong protestant and can't imagine this.

[Anonymous]

It seems like it sometimes isn't enforced anymore, but there very much are "rules" around which parish you are supposed to register at. Your priest has to give permission for you to go out of bounds.

https://encourageandteach.wordpress.com/2010/05/04/new-to-the-diocese-finding-your-parish/

"In the Diocese of Arlington, parishioners are required to register at the parish within whose boundaries they live. Your question goes beyond just an organizational policy. Rather, canon law says that priests are responsible for the spiritual well-being (ensuring the sacraments, etc.) of the people within his “domicile.”

[Anonymous]

I'm not a catholic, but was curious. Churches track donations?

Google FaithDirect

[Anonymous]

I'm not catholic, but in my experience, every 'church' has it's crazies. Maybe the pushy indivuduals are in the welcoming 'club', and after you settle in for a while and learn to live with some quirks, the charcter of the congregatino can become home.
Sometimes when you put a face of the whole organization on just a few people being pushy, you miss out more in the end. Maybe if you express your dissatisfaciton, they can become a better group and serve your needs better. It is well-intentioned, and maybe they need constructive criticism to better their program. I don't think you should throw in the towel just yet, but I do agree their behavior is not good thus far.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes. That is a big problem, and with the way parishes work, it's not just as easy changing to another church.

Have you been to Mass? If there wasn't this ridiculous committee showing up at your door, would you like the services & community of the parish?

If you like everything you see EXCEPT this committee, then I would get really forceful, really quick, about shutting that down. I'd ask them to please take me off their visit list and send an email to the Priest (and follow up in person) letting him know how it made you feel as a new parishioner. He needs to know about overzealous lay groups within the parish. His reaction will tell you what you need to know too - if he apologizes and says he will make sure they aren't bothering you, then you probably have a good parish with a few over-the-top group leaders. If he gets defensive and starts to be pushy about your husband, then it is worth pursuing a parish change. ...

I agree with the above, except to say that if the preset supports the welcome group, changing parishes would be essential to your family's wellbeing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not catholic, but in my experience, every 'church' has it's crazies. Maybe the pushy indivuduals are in the welcoming 'club', and after you settle in for a while and learn to live with some quirks, the charcter of the congregatino can become home.
Sometimes when you put a face of the whole organization on just a few people being pushy, you miss out more in the end. Maybe if you express your dissatisfaciton, they can become a better group and serve your needs better. It is well-intentioned, and maybe they need constructive criticism to better their program. I don't think you should throw in the towel just yet, but I do agree their behavior is not good thus far.

sure doesn't sound like it to me. It sounds like the worst of Catholic dogmatism.

[Anonymous]

That is really odd and not at all normal for Catholics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That is really odd and not at all normal for Catholics.

It's normal here. The diocese of Arlington (which covers many cities, not just Arlington) is very strict. They're the reason I switched to being a Protestant. They were very upset that my Fiance (now DH) wasn't Catholic and didn't want to marry us.

[Anonymous]

The Arlington diocese is one of the strictest in the country. If you Google it you will find articles about it. We joined a church in DC for this reason and I imagine that they are being pushy because they have trouble getting and keeping new members. If you are already uncomfortable I recommend that you seriously consider finding a parish outside of the Arlington diocese. We are much happier despite the drive each week!

[Anonymous]

LOL!

I'm the OP of this post and this is exactly what I am worried about! It's kind of strange how so many people told me I have nothing to worry about.

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/455024.page

[Anonymous]

This must be an Arlington thing. We joined a parish in Bethesda and at most we get a letter in the mail from them every few months telling us what's new in the parish.

I'd meet with the pastor about this. He is likely unaware of their pushy-ness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not a catholic, but was curious. Churches track donations?

Well you do need a receipt for the IRS for your cash donations. This makes it easy to track.