So I read all my kid's texts today

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why does a 6th grader need a phone?

+1
Why is she texting at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why does a 6th grader need a phone?

Actually she has an iPod touch which is what she's texting on. But she has a phone for taking mass transit to and from school by herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your child was significantly upset by seeing a photo of someone's middle finger? That doesn't sound normal to me. I'd venture to say you may be veering over into the "too sheltered" department, which often doesn't end well either. It's all about balance.

Huh? I'm an adult and not sheltered, but yeah, I'd be pretty upset if someone sent me a picture of them giving me the finger.

OP's child was upset by even seeing the photo. If you fall into that category, I can't fathom how you survive in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your child was significantly upset by seeing a photo of someone's middle finger? That doesn't sound normal to me. I'd venture to say you may be veering over into the "too sheltered" department, which often doesn't end well either. It's all about balance.

I curse like a sailor and DD is allowed to yell whatever curse word she wants as loud as she wants, each year on her birthday. Aside from that she dropped one "bullshit" and that's it for cursing for her. It was a girl she got into an argument with, and I think part of her upset was thinking that girl would work with her towards resolving it, rather than enflaming by posting a middle finger with a very angry face.

I think her way of rebelling against me is by being very "good."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you have a reason to do this?

Nothing specific was worrying me. But I like to go through her phone every few months. I last did it at the end of the summer. Especially now, when she's just started a new school and made new friends, I wanted to see how they talk to each other when they think nobody is looking. But overall, she's a good girl.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure you will dismiss me, but she is entering an age when she will care more about privacy and being treated as a separate individual from you. Ignore this at your peril.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure you will dismiss me, but she is entering an age when she will care more about privacy and being treated as a separate individual from you. Ignore this at your peril.

You didn't tell me anything I don't already know. She has no idea I looked at her iPod.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your child was significantly upset by seeing a photo of someone's middle finger? That doesn't sound normal to me. I'd venture to say you may be veering over into the "too sheltered" department, which often doesn't end well either. It's all about balance.

I curse like a sailor and DD is allowed to yell whatever curse word she wants as loud as she wants, each year on her birthday. Aside from that she dropped one "bullshit" and that's it for cursing for her. It was a girl she got into an argument with, and I think part of her upset was thinking that girl would work with her towards resolving it, rather than enflaming by posting a middle finger with a very angry face.

I think her way of rebelling against me is by being very "good."

Watch out. She may be rebelling by being good, or creating the illusion of goodness to give herself space and freedom.... Maybe not yet, but it is amazing how much you can get away with when your parents think you are a prude and a priss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure you will dismiss me, but she is entering an age when she will care more about privacy and being treated as a separate individual from you. Ignore this at your peril.

You didn't tell me anything I don't already know. She has no idea I looked at her iPod.

I would consider this a betrayal of trust, both as a parent and as a former 12-year-old -- unless you explicitly told her when she got her iPod that you reserve the right to look at any of her texts any time without telling her.

[Anonymous]

^^^and yes, if there had been texting when I was 12, I'm certain that my texts would have been boring for my parents to read.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does a 6th grader need a phone?

+1
Why is she texting at all?

This isn't so far gone you know. Most 6th graders have phones and are texting. You act like OP said she had something crazy or unusual. No, they don't need them - but kids this age have many things they don't need. It's part of being a kid.

[Anonymous]

I think there are plenty of innocent 6th graders and plenty of unsupervised inappropriate 6th graders of both genders.

Besides checking texts, check social media too. Things can change quickly once your DD's circle expands.

As far as being shocked by bad language and gestures, it's stupid that people would judge what's shocking to a child. My child has been shocked because of similar things and not that she hadn't heard it before, but that the kid would put it out in public. Some of them are afraid of getting in trouble, even if it's some other kid doing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your child was significantly upset by seeing a photo of someone's middle finger? That doesn't sound normal to me. I'd venture to say you may be veering over into the "too sheltered" department, which often doesn't end well either. It's all about balance.

Huh? I'm an adult and not sheltered, but yeah, I'd be pretty upset if someone sent me a picture of them giving me the finger.

You need to lighten up. It's meant as a joke. Uptight much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your child was significantly upset by seeing a photo of someone's middle finger? That doesn't sound normal to me. I'd venture to say you may be veering over into the "too sheltered" department, which often doesn't end well either. It's all about balance.

Huh? I'm an adult and not sheltered, but yeah, I'd be pretty upset if someone sent me a picture of them giving me the finger.

OP's child was upset by even seeing the photo. If you fall into that category, I can't fathom how you survive in life.

This

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does a 6th grader need a phone?

Actually she has an iPod touch which is what she's texting on. But she has a phone for taking mass transit to and from school by herself.

Can I sidetrack to ask how this happens with out a cell phone #? Let me guess: there's an app for that?