How often do you see your ILs

[Anonymous]

Twice a year, but for looooonnnng stays. It's too much. It would be better if they came for no more than a long weekend more frequently. They don't know how to be gracious houseguests so after a week, it wears on a person.

[Anonymous]

OP, your MIL is making your family her hobby. She doesn't need to visit for a week every month and a half. That is crazy.

[Anonymous]

We live across the country and dont see then often. This year with our schedule we only saw then once. They would come every other weekend if we let them.
OP do you stay at home or work? I stay at home and my IL frequently mention extended visits which would be mainly while DH works so we always manage to keep it to weekends or long weekends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, your MIL is making your family her hobby. She doesn't need to visit for a week every month and a half. That is crazy.

I agree. My ILs love the DC area, so visiting my house was their vacation. I stopped this after the third time they tried it. They would come for two weeks or longer, MIL and FIL are retired and SIL and BIL are teachers with summer off. It's too much. OP you need to decide how much time and how frequent you can handle having them over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As little as possible. After almost a decade of marriage, i'm done w/ my MIL. she's a very selfish person, and I can't stand to be around her. Two examples: 1) they refuse to turn up the heat when we visit. my 19 month old was ice cold in the morning. 2) she was making pancakes for breakfast. she served DH then FIL and then DH again. she ignored me and DD. I grabbed one off of DH's plate and started to feed DD.

We probably see her once or twice a year.

Do we share the same MIL? #pissingcontest

[Anonymous]

Op here. Told Husband I was ok with visits every 6-8 weeks but she can't stay at our house for more than 3 nights. This should come out to about 20 days at our house if he visits her twice and that I am completely comfortable with!

[Anonymous]

I am down to 2 or 3 times per year for an afternoon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am down to 2 or 3 times per year for an afternoon.

Not the OP but completely jealous. MIL came two paid holidays in a row for four nights apiece.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Once a year usually.They not really interested in coming over and for is its difficult to travel with 3 kids

This is us too. DH tries to get his dad to visit more, but he won't travel without his wife (although she will go visit her kids solo).

[Anonymous]

3x year for 3-4 days. We visit them. They live 8 hours away and we have a small child. We don't have room to put them up as our place is too small and uncomfortable for them. They, despite having enough money, don't want to come and stay in a hotel. When #2 arrives, it'll be cheaper for us to put them up in a hotel here for a week than it will for all 4 of us to fly to visit them and stay for free.

[Anonymous]

Probably about four times a year; most visits are a long weekend.

[Anonymous]

As little as possible.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, mine are dead.

Has its pluses and minuses.

[Anonymous]

Ils live out West, we are here in VA. When they visit it's usually for 10 days or so; and yes they stay with us.

My parents live in Europe and visit for a month + at a time; they split the time between our house and my brother's house.

By the end of visits, I'm so done. The last time my ILs visited my FIL banged up my car. They haven't visited for a year now, it was not a good visit not because of the banged up car (about $500 worth of damage) but because MIL opened up a can of worms with DH that I told her not to do, but she wanted to get it out. :sigh: My parents are coming for Christmas and they need a lot of hand holding :sigh: deep breath

[Anonymous]

I see my in-laws about every 4-6 weeks for just an afternoon and I think that's WAY too much! I can not imagine them coming for a WEEK at a time!! I'd die. But this also stands for my family, who I adore. I'd never accept a houseguest for that long.

Perhaps the way to approach it to ask for a) either less frequent visits or b) much shorter visits. No one should stay longer than 3 nights.