College student struggling with LD
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Anonymous
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Agree with 11:53's suggestions.
Teaching independence skills is key. Right now can your kid handle Activities of Daily Living? http://consultgerirn.org/uploads/File/trythis/try_this_23.pdf So many times we end up compensating in areas where our kids have shortcomings and don't even realize the co-dependent relationships we foster--their dependence on us. Then we wonder why they flounder trying to find a job/get through college. |
Anonymous
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Thank you for all these helpful replies! I feel he is relatively independent, at least as far as those activities of daily living go. But he doesn't seem to know how to study and learn independently.
He did see a psychologist last summer, but I think we need to focus specifically on this issue of where his future lies. I will be looking into some of these suggestions for finding help with this. |
Anonymous
| If in Maryland go to the division of rehabilitative services in wheaton. And Check out Montgomery Works while you are there. |
Anonymous
I'm so glad he's pretty good about ADL. Get a tutor who specializes in studying/executive functioning. These skills can be taught (and learned). It sounds like he has a lot of potential. I would also focus on social skills/self advocacy. Does he not ask for help b/c he's intimidated or b/c it doesn't occur to him. Secondly, get his buy in on what motivates him. A lot of kids with LDs don't like school. If there is an academic track that he's interested in/passionate about that will help. If not, try to help him figure out an alternate career path that interests him. He can do informational interviews/ask to shadow people in the field. |
Anonymous
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OP, you may find career aptitude testing by Johnson O'Connor helpful. This is much less expensive but much more career focused than neuropsych testing; it is not, however, covered by insurance. I took my DS there and they came out with some surprising findings. He went into a program for OCD as an older teenager, and the therapists there said this was the best aptitude testing they had seen. They have an office in downtown DC.
http://www.jocrf.org/ |
Anonymous
Dad of Asperger sonbacke. We were the family who were surprised just how poorly son did when all the regular familial supports (which we as NTs take for granted) were removed. DS just crashed - was sleeping in late, missed class, was not motivated, felt depressed, couldn't organize himself, room was a mess, etc. I just wanted to add two points and then tomorrow will go locate the post I did a few months ago when we were facing sophomore year and still didn't have the sleep issue under control. But to be brief, First, be sure you are engaged with the Office of Disability Services at your College or University. Hopefully, you were up front in the application or essay about your student's issues. Then during the summer preceding the first year the ODS will request a new round of testing. Ours provided a list of acceptable testers. DS went in for testing. Then because DS had waived his FERPA rights (very important - remember your child becomes an adult and you cannot act as an advocate, talk to anyone on campus or work with ODS if you don't have that paper signed), and depth of disability, we went in to meet with ODS. A caseworker is assigned and courseload is discussed. My wife had already argued for a reduced courseload became the homework load in last year of public school was obscene for DS. Well, it turns out that ODS will immediately suggest that. So DS starts with 12 units instead of sixteen. BTW, check, on some campuses, if you fall below 9 units you can't continue on on-site student housing. WE lowered it to 10 the second semester because of all the difficulties DS was encountering. This practice means your DS will not graduate in fouryears but if you are doing in-state or community college, your expenses will be much lower. Also, DS couldn't find a job so took two core courses during the summer, so made up the missing courses and entered this year as a sophomore. SEcond, if you work closely with ODS your DS will get the same accommodations he received under his IEP in high school (take your IEP with you when you meet with ODS - it doesn't follow your child into college but is very helpful for ODS to get a sense of what your child needs). On some campuses your DS will qualify for a single or double if he has ADHD. Some campuses provide copies of professors' notes. Some provide seating in the front if large lecture hall. Most will provide extra time on exams but DS will probably have to take the sealed exam to ODS and complete the exam there. Each campus has its own set of rules and also varying commitments to helping the students. Before you give up and think trade school, give the community college or in-state college option a good try while working with ODS, the writing center, the learning center, etc. There can be a lot of "supports" that the school will provide that you may not know about. Good luck! |
Anonymous
| Sorry. late and typing too fast. ^^ that was single or double room. Very important on some in-state campuses where triples and quads are used. If your child has ADHD, they don't need four kids and four different sets of issues going on when they need to focus and study. |
Anonymous
| And, yes, 12:03 is correct about dropping classes if you are working thru ODS. Usually there is a cut-off after which you cannot get any fees back (this is an in-state school, but not community college). However, if you work with ODS they will advise how many units they think your child can handle the next term and give you input as to what kind of teacher and course will be involved. We have learned that DS has great skills with memorization and fill-in-the-blank and project evaluations but writing a term paper is very difficult because there is just too much stuff going on in his head. So ODS will help you avoid the professors who have set up their courses in such a way that your child will have greatly difficulty. And, yes, if you find your child is just falling apart, you usually can drop out even after the regular drop without a fee penalty (but they don't like it). This term we started with a 13 unit load but knew we were facing a very tough year in an advanced foreign language. So far, so good. but we are paying for private tutors to work with DS on weekends in that subject. |
Anonymous
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OP here - he had all of those accommodations mentioned and his first year at college he was in a program where he took 3 courses and the other 2 slots were small group workshops where they went over the material from 2 of the courses. Even with all that support, he crashed and burned. He simply couldn't write anything intelligible about the subject matter, even with my direct help.
So we are now trying community college, but he chose to go into a computer technician program. I knew it would be a challenge because his math skills are weak, but I didn't want to discourage him. It turns out he is in way over his head again. So that is why I think at least part of the issue is the choice of program. Certainly, I think it's a great idea to get some tutoring in how to study etc. (I guess I thought he would have learned that at his expensive private school, but I digress!) so I will be looking into that too. |
Anonymous
Dad of Aspie back. We were also surprised how poorly DS could write when away from supports. He also has ADHD and anxiety disorders. We had gone private for years then mainstreams for four years with an IEP. We THOUGHT he knew how to compose an essay. He spent all his time on homework. But in the college atmosphere he just couldn't figure out how to select a theme or subject in the class to write about, develop a thesis, and compose paragraphs and arguments on same. We made use of the writing clinic at the university but DS didn't make appointments soon enough in the year so pulled a different tutor each time on the same paper. Eventually we brought him home and had a tutor help him (more $$). This year we now know the lay of the land so the moment a paper is announced, DS signs up for several meetings at the writing center in advance. I like the idea of computer technician. The IT field is exploding. Most IT techs. do not have to have calculus. That comes in when you are learning to code which IT Techs most likely won't ever have to do. Our psycihiatrist recommends community college for his adult (18) aspergers patients but ours cannot drive yet so, for us, it makes more sense to be on an university campus with a room (less driving for mom and dad) and then comes home for tutoring on weekends. That's worked for us but for many others community college makes more sense. Also, if you have a very bright aspie who gets good grades, you can transfer to flagship schools if grades are higih enough. I had once thought we might go that way but right now we are still in day-to-day survival. good luck! |
Anonymous
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While our young adult daughter with a disability did not have the option of going to college, a key issue is what are the college years going to lead to in terms of a job? This is where I do think making a connection with the local Department of Aging and Rehabilitative Services (DARS) for the young adult right after high school if really no direction or during the college years makes sense. There will be no tutors on the job or extra time to perform a task. While I know an Associates Degree of Bacheolors Degree can definitely be a plus in getting into the job market, for these young adults, you are going to have to have the education at some point tied to a real "workforce" setting and job. If one can either with DARS or the other private resource get an evaluation done of interests, skills needed and present abilities then while in a post high collegiate setting, one might start testing the waters on a career path way through some unpaid internships and/or volunteer work. What DARS or other private providers can provide is an entre into a work setting and evaluation to help put accommodations in place which might assist a person with a disability to learn a job and keep a job. If one can private pay and can find the right setting, then the training could even start full-time with gradual fading and the follow-along support could be as needed. But again, to start to explore while one is in school or during winter and summer breaks is a good idea. We used DARS to get our daughter trained for her job which is as a Dining Room attendant in a busy college dining room during the academic year 10 years ago part-time. However, we also used a private job coach starting three years ago to train her first to work in a senior program at lunch time and about 15 months ago in a small cafe run by a non-profit. She actually does a lot more in terms of skills in the volunteer job. Both her paying and volunteer job equal about 17 hours a week. The same approach could be applied to any field with a higher level of skills training. |
Anonymous
| 14:59 offers great advice. We, too, have pondered whether or not to give up on college but this past summer we tried but simply could not find a summer job for our disabled daughter. So we're staying in the B.A. system for the time being but I don't know if we will make it all four or five years. |
Anonymous
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I am poster above 14:59, and to be clear I am in no way equating what our daughter is able to do with any of the young adults in a college program - only talking about the process. Time in college for a young adult dealing with many challenges/deficits can't be just focused on in a vacuum or "the jumping off cliff" just crops up again whether it is two, four or six years later for the young adult and the family. Depending upon the disability, I am just suggesting that parents might think about the connections which ight be made during the post high college years to connect what is being studied to the world of work or the world after college. I would imagine in the Washington DC area that there a myriad of public and private options, but some things I would consider learning about would be: #1- Services of the Department of Aging and Rehabilitative Services (DARS) and if there is a waiting list for assessment and/or services so one can get on it. - Other Employment Services for those with Disabilities in the area. #2- Cash Benefits that a young adult might qualify for who ends up not being able to earn Substantial Gainful Employment (SGA) for a year which currently is $1,00 per month gross from working. Start at www.ssa.gove and look up Supplemental Security Income -(SSI) or Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI) if one or both parents are retired, disabled or have passed away. #3- Medicaid Waivers - For this discussion look up the Developmental Disabilities Waiver (DD Waiver) to gain an understanding of possible services. If one is unable to work, it can fund a variety of services, but not 24/7 residential. #4- Medicaid Health Insurance and why one might want to establish one's "eligibility for it" for the young adult. You can still have the son or daughter remain on the family health care plan through age 26 and then even COBRA till 29, but it does open some possible service doors such as Case Management with some agencies. #5 - Volunteer Services Centers which might offer opportunities to explore possible areas related to working as well as service and to learning soft work skills and building a resume. #6- Specific Non-Profit Organizations which might need volunteers and be willing to give your son or daughter a chance with or without a privately paid volunteer job coach. It remains a mosaic for many young adults with a significant disability in working to help them put the pieces of a life together. For us and for other families it also may well mean planning a retirement for three, and I can only recommend that you do the research carefully of what opportunities there are for all three now and in the future. |
Anonymous
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Sorry one correction - Substantial Gainful Employment - SGA - is $1,070/month gross in 2014. |
Anonymous
| Not OP, but I really appreciate the insights of parents whose kids are older and not necessarily on the college path. (I'm pretty sure this will be us in a few years.) |