What to do w/advanced 1st grader who is starting to dislike school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since her reading is already way ahead why not focus on writing instead? You are hoping for her to read HS level of reading by second grade? This s a good question for the teacher. Is writing level holding back her reading level. What can I focus on her with writing?

We already know her writing level is holding back her reading level -- the teacher told us that. And that her writing level is above "expected" for her age, so it's not like there's a problem with writing. She's just average at writing at this point and way ahead of average in reading/comprehension. We are focusing on writing, but the problem with holding back her reading is that she isn't interested in those simple books. (Think how you would feel if someone told you you could only read books for 5-year-olds. C'mon. Boring.) So it's making her *less interested in reading*, which sucks. Of course at home at night she reads what she wants, but now she says she "hates to read in school". Great.
I don't care if she's reading at high school level by the end of elementary or not. I don't think that's a bad thing if that's where her interests and aptitudes take her.

Then I would ask the teacher for the teacher's opinions of your daughter's reading work in class. She may be telling you one thing at home and doing something else at school. But, if not, I would tell her that yes, the books in school are simple but she still needs to do the classwork, and isn't it great that she gets to come home and read the books she picks out for herself.

I also think it's a mistake to assume (and perhaps send your daughter the message?) that books for five-year-olds are boring. There are boring books for five-year-olds, and interesting books for five-year-olds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since her reading is already way ahead why not focus on writing instead? You are hoping for her to read HS level of reading by second grade? This s a good question for the teacher. Is writing level holding back her reading level. What can I focus on her with writing?

We already know her writing level is holding back her reading level -- the teacher told us that. And that her writing level is above "expected" for her age, so it's not like there's a problem with writing. She's just average at writing at this point and way ahead of average in reading/comprehension. We are focusing on writing, but the problem with holding back her reading is that she isn't interested in those simple books. (Think how you would feel if someone told you you could only read books for 5-year-olds. C'mon. Boring.) So it's making her *less interested in reading*, which sucks. Of course at home at night she reads what she wants, but now she says she "hates to read in school". Great.
I don't care if she's reading at high school level by the end of elementary or not. I don't think that's a bad thing if that's where her interests and aptitudes take her.

OP here, and just to clarify, the quoted response here is a different poster, though we seem to have a similar situation. My daughter's writing is quite good, unless you consider that her handwriting is awful (which I know matters, too!)

Anyway, thank you to all for the helpful responses. I appreciate the wisdom of parents who have been there, done that. I will schedule a time to talk with the teacher, not to go in with any particular agenda other than to understand better what my daughter is doing in school and to convey the boredom issue in gentler terms. I will pots back here at some point, as a PP asked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since her reading is already way ahead why not focus on writing instead? You are hoping for her to read HS level of reading by second grade? This s a good question for the teacher. Is writing level holding back her reading level. What can I focus on her with writing?

We already know her writing level is holding back her reading level -- the teacher told us that. And that her writing level is above "expected" for her age, so it's not like there's a problem with writing. She's just average at writing at this point and way ahead of average in reading/comprehension. We are focusing on writing, but the problem with holding back her reading is that she isn't interested in those simple books. (Think how you would feel if someone told you you could only read books for 5-year-olds. C'mon. Boring.) So it's making her *less interested in reading*, which sucks. Of course at home at night she reads what she wants, but now she says she "hates to read in school". Great.
I don't care if she's reading at high school level by the end of elementary or not. I don't think that's a bad thing if that's where her interests and aptitudes take her.

Then I would ask the teacher for the teacher's opinions of your daughter's reading work in class. She may be telling you one thing at home and doing something else at school. But, if not, I would tell her that yes, the books in school are simple but she still needs to do the classwork, and isn't it great that she gets to come home and read the books she picks out for herself.

I also think it's a mistake to assume (and perhaps send your daughter the message?) that books for five-year-olds are boring. There are boring books for five-year-olds, and interesting books for five-year-olds.

The teacher did confirm this, sort of apologetically. I got the sense she feels hamstrung by some "rule". Yes, there are interesting books for 5-year-olds, and I've certainly not tried to send the message that they're boring. Some of them are books I love. But she says she has to read "babyish books" at school.
She does follow the rules at school and does what she's told. I don't need to tell her that -- she's not a behavior problem. But she's starting to not like school. That's not good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since her reading is already way ahead why not focus on writing instead? You are hoping for her to read HS level of reading by second grade? This s a good question for the teacher. Is writing level holding back her reading level. What can I focus on her with writing?

We already know her writing level is holding back her reading level -- the teacher told us that. And that her writing level is above "expected" for her age, so it's not like there's a problem with writing. She's just average at writing at this point and way ahead of average in reading/comprehension. We are focusing on writing, but the problem with holding back her reading is that she isn't interested in those simple books. (Think how you would feel if someone told you you could only read books for 5-year-olds. C'mon. Boring.) So it's making her *less interested in reading*, which sucks. Of course at home at night she reads what she wants, but now she says she "hates to read in school". Great.
I don't care if she's reading at high school level by the end of elementary or not. I don't think that's a bad thing if that's where her interests and aptitudes take her.

OP here, and just to clarify, the quoted response here is a different poster, though we seem to have a similar situation. My daughter's writing is quite good, unless you consider that her handwriting is awful (which I know matters, too!)

Anyway, thank you to all for the helpful responses. I appreciate the wisdom of parents who have been there, done that. I will schedule a time to talk with the teacher, not to go in with any particular agenda other than to understand better what my daughter is doing in school and to convey the boredom issue in gentler terms. I will pots back here at some point, as a PP asked.

Yes, PP here, referred to above. I didn't mean to pretend to be OP! Similar situation on the reading (but not writing) front.

[Anonymous]

This is one of the PPs again that was in a similar situation Just to give another perspective, I also have a child with potential LD or ADD that is now one of the ones taking up the teachers attention. Just be glad you are not dealing with that. There are worse problems to have!

[Anonymous]

Is it possible that the child is getting the message that advanced is good and "babyish" is bad? I ask because I've had two boys go through those early grades as very advanced readers and they never said they were bored or hated school reading; they just seemed pleased to be able to finish their worksheets easily and have more time to do work of their choice or mess around with their friends.

[Anonymous]

Friends (including some who are teachers) are constantly marveling at what my 6-year-old daughter is reading (i.e., sixth-grade level chapter books), stories she's written, and the way she can describe how complex things work. People often ask me what I'm doing to make sure she is challenged in school. The honest and apparently insufficient answer is: nothing.

I think you are a troll.

* If you have friends who are teachers they would be the ones to ask for advice not some anonymous forum.

* I doubt your 6 year old is reading 6th grade level chapter books. I have a 6th grader the subject matter and vocabulary of his chapter books are beyond what a 6 year old could read and comprehend.

* People would never ask a parent what they are doing to make sure she is challenged in school, that would just be an odd question.

If your child was truly that gifted it would be evident in a school environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it possible that the child is getting the message that advanced is good and "babyish" is bad? I ask because I've had two boys go through those early grades as very advanced readers and they never said they were bored or hated school reading; they just seemed pleased to be able to finish their worksheets easily and have more time to do work of their choice or mess around with their friends.

I know people like to blame the parents for this, but honestly, I've never sent that message. I like little kids' books. She does tend to label anything she's not interested in as "babyish", probably in part because she has a little sister (so defines herself as more grownup than her sister, natch). I think some kids are just more sensitive to that social dynamic. This one is VERY aware of social/emotional stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Friends (including some who are teachers) are constantly marveling at what my 6-year-old daughter is reading (i.e., sixth-grade level chapter books), stories she's written, and the way she can describe how complex things work. People often ask me what I'm doing to make sure she is challenged in school. The honest and apparently insufficient answer is: nothing.

I think you are a troll.

* If you have friends who are teachers they would be the ones to ask for advice not some anonymous forum.

* I doubt your 6 year old is reading 6th grade level chapter books. I have a 6th grader the subject matter and vocabulary of his chapter books are beyond what a 6 year old could read and comprehend.

* People would never ask a parent what they are doing to make sure she is challenged in school, that would just be an odd question.

If your child was truly that gifted it would be evident in a school environment.

I dunno. Not OP, but I was reading "The Hobbit" by myself at 6. I suspect that's at 6th grade reading level. No special instruction by parents, just a reader. My writing was certainly not at "The Hobbit" level.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it possible that the child is getting the message that advanced is good and "babyish" is bad? I ask because I've had two boys go through those early grades as very advanced readers and they never said they were bored or hated school reading; they just seemed pleased to be able to finish their worksheets easily and have more time to do work of their choice or mess around with their friends.

I know people like to blame the parents for this, but honestly, I've never sent that message. I like little kids' books. She does tend to label anything she's not interested in as "babyish", probably in part because she has a little sister (so defines herself as more grownup than her sister, natch). I think some kids are just more sensitive to that social dynamic. This one is VERY aware of social/emotional stuff.

Same PP here -- also, this one doesn't get to "mess around with her friends" when she finishes early, so there's no incentive there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I dunno. Not OP, but I was reading "The Hobbit" by myself at 6. I suspect that's at 6th grade reading level. No special instruction by parents, just a reader. My writing was certainly not at "The Hobbit" level.

I probably read The Hobbit by myself at 6, too, but I seriously doubt that I would have been able to answer complicated reading comprehension questions about it. Certainly there would have been a lot that I missed, from vocabulary to humor to characterization and characters' motivation (such as there is, in The Hobbit).

Which is not to say that six-year-olds should not read The Hobbit! Just that merely being able to read the book doesn't mean you're at that reading level, the way the school defines it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I dunno. Not OP, but I was reading "The Hobbit" by myself at 6. I suspect that's at 6th grade reading level. No special instruction by parents, just a reader. My writing was certainly not at "The Hobbit" level.

I probably read The Hobbit by myself at 6, too, but I seriously doubt that I would have been able to answer complicated reading comprehension questions about it. Certainly there would have been a lot that I missed, from vocabulary to humor to characterization and characters' motivation (such as there is, in The Hobbit).

Which is not to say that six-year-olds should not read The Hobbit! Just that merely being able to read the book doesn't mean you're at that reading level, the way the school defines it.

But just because you couldn't, doesn't mean other kids couldn't. Not to toot my own horn, but I definitely could. My parents were awesome about asking discussion-type questions, and I spent nearly all my time outside of school with adults who were like that. (Not the best thing socially, but I was happy.) And I know I'm not the smartest person in the world, and wasn't the most advanced child. So, that's just to say that I think it's unwarranted to disbelieve OP. It's entirely possible that there's a kid doing this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I dunno. Not OP, but I was reading "The Hobbit" by myself at 6. I suspect that's at 6th grade reading level. No special instruction by parents, just a reader. My writing was certainly not at "The Hobbit" level.

I probably read The Hobbit by myself at 6, too, but I seriously doubt that I would have been able to answer complicated reading comprehension questions about it. Certainly there would have been a lot that I missed, from vocabulary to humor to characterization and characters' motivation (such as there is, in The Hobbit).

Which is not to say that six-year-olds should not read The Hobbit! Just that merely being able to read the book doesn't mean you're at that reading level, the way the school defines it.

But just because you couldn't, doesn't mean other kids couldn't. Not to toot my own horn, but I definitely could. My parents were awesome about asking discussion-type questions, and I spent nearly all my time outside of school with adults who were like that. (Not the best thing socially, but I was happy.) And I know I'm not the smartest person in the world, and wasn't the most advanced child. So, that's just to say that I think it's unwarranted to disbelieve OP. It's entirely possible that there's a kid doing this.

I think that one should be cautious about saying that one could have done something one didn't actually do, when one was six.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Friends (including some who are teachers) are constantly marveling at what my 6-year-old daughter is reading (i.e., sixth-grade level chapter books), stories she's written, and the way she can describe how complex things work. People often ask me what I'm doing to make sure she is challenged in school. The honest and apparently insufficient answer is: nothing.

I think you are a troll.

* If you have friends who are teachers they would be the ones to ask for advice not some anonymous forum.

* I doubt your 6 year old is reading 6th grade level chapter books. I have a 6th grader the subject matter and vocabulary of his chapter books are beyond what a 6 year old could read and comprehend.

* People would never ask a parent what they are doing to make sure she is challenged in school, that would just be an odd question.

If your child was truly that gifted it would be evident in a school environment.

OP here, and grateful for a good laugh. Yeah, I tend to befriend really assertive people. It has its pros and cons! And my few teacher friends' advice has limits because they teach in different states and different school levels. As for my daughter's reading level and how it relates to the curriculum, the responses I've gotten on this thread are quite helpful for thinking about that.

[Anonymous]

My child is/was the same. Very verbally advanced, and also advanced understanding of concepts. This will be a struggle for years to come. In fact, my child complained vociferously in 6th about reading a book that he felt was a grade 3-4 level book (his school in another country was teaching that same book years before). With kids who are gifted, no matter what the placement (say skipping ahead a year) it may still not address their needs for intellectual stimulation. We tell our kid that school is for learning important *skills.* He can learn whatever he wants at home. He also uses the word babyish. It is demeaning and very difficult to sustain attention and even perform well when the school is teaching books of the kind gifted kids read years earlier. Believe me, I try to tell my son to look for the good and interest in the book, but it's very difficult and when I put myself in his shoes I understand his position. You might add School for Tomorrow to your list of privates to look into. Very creative, personalized education. Great for gifted kids but a very different format than public school. I don't have a child there but have visited and it looks there are a lot of gifted, creative kids. I would definitely talk to the teacher and keep asking her for ways your daughter can be more engaged. She sounds like an eager learner and that needs to be celebrated and supported at school. Ideally a good school should do that but with so much pressure on teachers to push curriculum and NCLB it seems the priorities are not in the right place. Good luck.