grandparent visits- when is it too much

Anonymous
It appears I'm alone in this, but I feel bad for your parents. They want to be with their family and you don't want them there. That's sad.
Anonymous
Actually it sounds like potentially a good arrangement if you worked bc you could have good child care,
Particularly in the preschool, school years.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It appears I'm alone in this, but I feel bad for your parents. They want to be with their family and you don't want them there. That's sad.


She has been more than accommodating for a year. The ILs have nothing to be sad about.

Who is this person who stalks the Family Relationship forum to bemoan how the intergenerational tradition has changed in the last century? Give it a rest already!
Anonymous
It is too much when you and DH think it's too much.

What your parents are doing would be fine with me and DH and I've certainly left my DCs with my parents and my ILs for a few days or even a week+ at a stretch to go on vacation (but I grew up going to my grandparents' house after school more days than not, and my parents would always send me to my grandparents' house during breaks) but I am not you - you should do what makes you and DH happy while still allowing the grandparents to see the kids which your proposed plans seem to allow for. You obviously care for your parents, but your nuclear family and their well-being has to be a priority. I think as long as you establish clear guidelines so there are clear expectations and everyone knows what's OK and what's not, you'll be fine.

And when the kid is older, seriouslt consider leaving them with your parents for a few days - it will make a fun getaway for you and your DH!
Anonymous
If they're retired, why don't you suggest they come during the week? Presumably your husband will be at work so he won't be dealing with them all day, so it won't be as annoying for him. They could come Wednesday - Saturday or something. Same amount of time with baby, less affect on your weekends.
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