Question for the men, re: intimacy with pregnant wife

[Anonymous]

PP: every man for a time feels that his life is going to be drastically altered when witnessing his wife's pregnancy. Depending on the personality type the prospect of a new life to care for will inspire thoughts of dread or blind joy; I had a combination for our first.
I may have come off a bit harsh, but come on, be honest; babies wake up at 3am and scream for 3hrs and sometimes there's nothing you can do. I knew this from watching others and frankly it scared me; watching the love of my life double in size and become completely obsessed with baby books and names and bumpers and bugaboo strollers and baby Einstein mobiles....what happened to the porn star who would argue world economics with me? How come she's wearing those ugly flat shoes? Oh..that pencil skirt I love to see you in doesn't fit anymore? What's with all the sweatpants? I don't remember you snoring?

It all goes back to normal by the time the kid is three, but getting there is tough on all men. The op's husband just has the first time jitters and I'm sure it will be fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:your bigger tits will help.

+2

[Anonymous]

My wife's sex drive completely died with the birth of our first child. It's been almost 7 years now. Even her Hitachi vibrator is gathering dust. I would have never believed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. He sounds like a pansy. Pregnancy sex is awesome.

Yes, Pregnancy sex is awesome. However, many men who care about their wives have concerns. I find this fear actually comforting. Yes, they need to get over it, but all in all, OP is lucky that her DH treats her with concern and care.

PP, you on the other hand, sound like a very low-class person.

[Anonymous]

An experienced DW here. Sex drive will fluctuate for both men and women. Some because of hormones and some because of the lack of sleep.

How to keep some physical connection going when you are tired, in pain, lacking sleep, without time? I would suggest that even a handjob/BJ/ toys will be enough to tide your DH or DW through this hump.

Does it get better? Oh yes! Even better than what it was pre-baby. Because when the babies stop needing you...you become kinkier and more appreciative of the sex you are getting!!

Just make sure that you are having sex- any sex - a couple times, every week!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. He sounds like a pansy. Pregnancy sex is awesome.

Yes, Pregnancy sex is awesome. However, many men who care about their wives have concerns. I find this fear actually comforting. Yes, they need to get over it, but all in all, OP is lucky that her DH treats her with concern and care.

PP, you on the other hand, sound like a very low-class person.

Oh, STFU. You can feel concern for your wife and still have sex with her while pregnant. If the wife is willing and the husband isn't, that doesn't exactly demonstrate concern and care, does it?

[Anonymous]

As a man, I can empathize with your DH. Esp if he sports a hammer like me...but seriously, for some reason, I felt more comfortable with doggy style. Probably felt like I wasn't crushing the baby, or I wasn't seeing/feeling the baby. My wife was very good about a sense of humor, too. We had lots of jokes about the baby coming out with penis shaped dents. It helped that she kept things light and fun, but she didn't shy away from the topic. But for some men, this is a real thing, but it has nothing to do with your DH bring a pansy. It just means he cares about the baby and you. And FYI - sex doesn't necessarily bad after birth. But it does get quick and quiet!

[Anonymous]

Sometimes the sexlessness is "just a phase." Often enough, it's permanent. Otherwise sexless marriages wouldn't be such a cliche. And it's pretty damn common for the decline in sex to start with pregnancy.

[Anonymous]

DH had issues in my first esp when the baby would move, he'd scream and jump off the bed.....ok I found it uncomfortable too. By our second we were pros and had weekly sex until I was seven months and then I I was too sick the last two months. Resumed sex 4 weeks pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW and I kept going up till about 7-8 months. x 3 kids; at that point the geometry and discomfort of a giant belly sort of kill off the mood.

The other thing that's probably dropping his dick is the thoughts of caring for a baby and what that will mean to his world. I felt a tremendous weight on me when DW was pregnant with #1; I lost more than a few erections when thoughts of shit diapers, screaming babies and college funds would would wash over me when I felt or saw her swollen belly.

#2 and #3 didn't have that effect on me, probably because I already knew how fucking miserable I was going to be for the next 2 years.

Then WHY did you have more kids? Everyone is a martyr!