Help me respond to DH (think he's overreacting)

[Anonymous]

Sure, I will help you respond.

"Sure honey, I willl absolutely attend the event by your side. What time should I be ready? Oh and BTW, I am going to XYZ on Sunday to relax and decompress."

[Anonymous]

So in other words, his feelings mean little to you but on the other hand your feelings should mean more to him. Got it.

[Anonymous]

wtf???OP are you saying this is a regular event that both of you attend, and this ONE time you needed some time to yourself, so you decided to skip it? Or are you bailing on the activity all together? If its the former, tell your husband to grow the fuck up! Really??? the silent treatment? He is totally overreacting. What about your needs? He cant go this one time alone? So basically you are not allowed to be overwhelmed and take some time for yourself?

[Anonymous]

I don't think it is just this one event. He is worried about you two and trying to talk about it. You need to talk to him about the part where he feels like you two are not doing enough couples things together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Yes, we do plenty of things together - we share a lot of common interests and like to spend a lot of time together. I don't generally back out of doing something with him, so in my mind he should be an "adult" and understand that I just really need to do that this time.

That's part of why I'm having a hard time here. Sure, I could just go with him because its important to him - that's easy to do. But that won't fix the difficulty I'm having understanding him and not being dismissive of his feelings.

you ever stop and think that some maybe most of the things you do together he does FOR you and not because he's necessarily interested to do it for himself? OP, you are being defensive so stop. you say you listen but still don't understand - you're not listening but just hearing what you want to hear.

have you asked him how much this particular event means to him. do you know why it's important? maybe he loves showing off his hot wife to the other husbands. suck it up, it's a couple of hours. you know, deep down, you've made him suffer through much worse (at least it was to him).

by the way, welcome to the world of men - we deal with this ALL the time and we suck at figuring it out.