cannot have an intellectual conversation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I read posts like OP's I can't help but wonder if he/she is just deflecting. It's so much easier to focus on how your spouse isn't meeting your needs than to examine your own shortcomings. The only person you can change in any relationship is yourself. I wonder what OP has done to engage in activities that are important to spouse. What has OP done to inquire what spouse wants to do? What has OP done to celebrate what spouse is good at and enjoys? Marriage is a give and take. One person does not meet every single need. But you can celebrate what your partner brings to the relationship.

+1 this is great wisdom that I wish more and more people would take seriously - especially those who frequent this thread.

[Anonymous]

You can't necessarily expect a spouse to meet your every need. In a perfect world, mine would have more going on intellectually. He's smart, but lazy and uninterested. But I'm with him because he meets some basic and important emotional need for me. I have smart, interesting, educated friends to talk to.

[Anonymous]

I always wondered why a friend married this vacuous blond bimbo (first marriage for both) when he was a highly paid and intelligent person--I know why she married him, obviously. So I asked, and he said after a long day of being "on" all the time, he needed to decompress with his eye candy wife. I lost touch, and don't know if they are still together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No offense OP, but dropping the "F" bomb as much as you do is not exactly intellectual conversation in my book.
In other words, you don't exactly sound too classy yourself.

Just sayin'..............................................................

Great/Excellent Point Made Right Here!!

[Anonymous]

LOL, this is so funny !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can not have meaningful conversations with DW either. Before being married, she would feign interest, and listen to me. However, I was too dense to notice that I was pontificating, with no back and forth.

But, I do not drop f-bombs once per line. I have found f-bombs and intellectual conversation are counter-indicated.

You mean contraindicated?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can not have meaningful conversations with DW either. Before being married, she would feign interest, and listen to me. However, I was too dense to notice that I was pontificating, with no back and forth.

But, I do not drop f-bombs once per line. I have found f-bombs and intellectual conversation are counter-indicated.

I have a sibling who's so narcissistic that I sometimes wonder why he bothers talking to people since he doesn't even seem to need the feigning of interest that a person would provide while he pontificates endlessly. Really, a wall would do just as well.

Have you tried a wall?

[Anonymous]

Your siling must be my boss. NAND damn, tomorrowns Monday.

[Anonymous]

Oh my. Autocorrect. Meant - your sibling must be my boss. Clearly time for me to go to bed.

[Anonymous]

Sorry about your metal waateland. I mean, your teenage wasteland. And, your tight waistband.

I'm so sick of my husband deciding to talk to me, finally, at 11:30 when I'm bed half asleep or zoning out on my laptop that I don't even have the energy to talk.

Maybe your spouse is tired. Or, just tired of you?

[Anonymous]

OP, count your blessings.

All DH is willing to share is his intellect, in a very dry, professorial way.

No emotional give-and-take ever. No empathy. No love, maybe?

It's wearing me down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No offense OP, but dropping the "F" bomb as much as you do is not exactly intellectual conversation in my book.
In other words, you don't exactly sound too classy yourself.

Just sayin'..............................................................

Agreed. Was OP wearing sweat clothes while she wrote her post?

Wow. I thought OP was a DH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can not have meaningful conversations with DW either. Before being married, she would feign interest, and listen to me. However, I was too dense to notice that I was pontificating, with no back and forth.

Oh my god. Well, she suffered through dating you, now you can suffer through the marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can not have meaningful conversations with DW either. Before being married, she would feign interest, and listen to me. However, I was too dense to notice that I was pontificating, with no back and forth.

Oh my god. Well, she suffered through dating you, now you can suffer through the marriage.

lolz. +1