Anonymous wrote:This happens to us too. I've come to realize I'm a big part of the problem since I build the trip/night up in my mind and them am disappointed when my husband has different priorities for the time (i.e. I want to feel like I'm on a great romantic date and reconnect, he wants to decompress by doing nothing or enjoy our time with friends). When I recognized this, things got better since I started (1) talking to him beforehand about what I really wanted to get out of our time together and (2) cutting him some slack for going into a trip with different wants and expectations.
This +1000. I realized I had built up expectations where one night was supposed to take care of everything that we weren't getting to in our day to day interactions--romance, feeling connected, crazy sex, sleeping in. That was SO unrealistic, especially when I wasn't sharing those expectations with the spouse. I was setting myself and us up for failure.
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