"Stop acting so white and start acting more black."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you need to chill out. Her comment was more offensive to herself. She meant that in some areas, Black folks are less likely to have bank accounts and credit cards, so they have to go to a store and pay cash. It is just a fact abd she wasn't PC about how she related that to you. Big deal. Understand her point and where she is coming from and move on.

New poster here, a manager and employment lawyer. Whether this is true or not -- and I have no idea if it is -- the workplace is a different environment than a party, your home, the store, your front porch, the hair salon, or the dance studio. In the workplace, you do not and cannot engage in racially charged conversations and racial stereotyping. Her "point," whether valid or not, is totally inappropriate conversation in the workplace.

OP, if this is brought up to you again, go to your manager or HR. Black-on-black discrimination and "schooling" can be just as damaging career wise as white on black discrimination. And your boss has a responsibility to control this woman whether or not it's her friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So this is just sort of a rant. I was in the kitchen/break room at work today and I was talking to my coworker and friend. We were discussing the recent fraud on my credit card. Another woman joined the conversation and asked if I buy stuff online. I told her I do, occasionally, but mostly from amazon. She then gave me a lecture about the dangers of buying online and how I should only use cash for purchases in-store. Then she told me I needed to "stop acting so white and start acting more black". I was shocked. I would never say anything like that to anyone because it's completely inappropriate.

I can't even say anything to anyone about it because she and the big boss have worked together something like 20 years and no one would even believe me. I was completely floored, and my mouth just dropped and hung there. After her rant, she got up and left the room and my friend and I just looked at each other, stunned.

If the roles were reversed, I'm completely sure I would have been fired, or at least suspended.

I don't find it offensive. I find it simply stupid.

[Anonymous]

I'm assuming the OP is black - I am too and I would have been pissed off. This makes my blood boil.

I don't know how comfortable you feel OP, but I would go back to her and address it with her privately. And tell her straight up that you didn't appreciate her comment and that there is no such thing as acting white or black. She has no right to project her insecurity on you.

[Anonymous]

I assume this isn't a workplace where racial stereotypes are engaged in regularly to humorous effect.

If you don't see a change in how she treats you, just attribute it to stupidity on her part.

[Anonymous]

I don't know what to assume about the races of the participants. I have ok idea what race the speaker is, which I think would be relevant in attempting to decipher what the heck she meant by it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm assuming the OP is black - I am too and I would have been pissed off. This makes my blood boil.

I don't know how comfortable you feel OP, but I would go back to her and address it with her privately. And tell her straight up that you didn't appreciate her comment and that there is no such thing as acting white or black. She has no right to project her insecurity on you.

Op here. I'm white. However I did not grow up the way she assumes I did. I do not buy online because I think I'm too good for a store or whatever. I buy on amazon because it's cheaper!

[Anonymous]

Op here....sorry I did not clarify. I am white and the other employee is black. And the friend I was talking to is Hispanic. We are a very racially diverse company, which makes it all th more angering to me.

[Anonymous]

I assumed OP that you were black. Now I'm stumped about what she meant. Was she joking around? It's a sick joke on so many levels but it totally says more about her and how she thinks of herself than you.

If you work in a diverse company and it values that diversity, I would talk to her or someone about it. Forget the part about her being buddy, buddy with the big boss. If it made you feel uncomfortable then it is worth discussing.

[Anonymous]

I think the person making the comment was being self-deprecating about her race. I would just let it go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you need to chill out. Her comment was more offensive to herself. She meant that in some areas, Black folks are less likely to have bank accounts and credit cards, so they have to go to a store and pay cash. It is just a fact abd she wasn't PC about how she related that to you. Big deal. Understand her point and where she is coming from and move on.

No every black person I know shops online. Me and Amazon are like best friends.

Her comment was just straight ignorant. I've never in life heard of shopping online being a white thing.

She may be off her meds. You never know with people.

[Anonymous]

Anyone who is a slave to acting Irish, Italian, Jewish, Greek, Black, Russian, or Yugoslavian for that matter is a fool. Just be yourself. Life is grand. It is such a shame when people try act like any kind of an ethnic stereotype just to give the appearance of having a niche where they fit in.

This is America and it's not a bad place to be. Adopt the social norms of this country and treat others well and you'll be okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I assume this isn't a workplace where racial stereotypes are engaged in regularly to humorous effect.

If you don't see a change in how she treats you, just attribute it to stupidity on her part.

I think that sort of workplace is known as a "hostile working environment."

[Anonymous]

OP, I can't even. I'm sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here....sorry I did not clarify. I am white and the other employee is black. And the friend I was talking to is Hispanic. We are a very racially diverse company, which makes it all th more angering to me.

Save your self righteous anger for when someone gets shot to death just because they were walking down the street looking for help. Or when they get beat by police officers because they showed annoyance at being pulled over for no reason instead of the mandatory groveling at the officers feet.

But being angry because a black person said that black people don't shop online?? The only thing you should be annoyed at is her ignorance. Get some real problems, dumb ass.

[Anonymous]

I don't get this at all OP. You can't be discriminated against for being white. White is protected by law.