Troubled Expecting Mom. Don't Know What To Do

[Anonymous]

Agree with pp about trying to visualize the future. I am sure that it is hard to think past the present right now, especially with feeling so sick and all of the other things going on. But as much as you can, try to base your decision on what you think is best in the long run.

[Anonymous]

No advice other than seconding what others have already posted about seeking the guidance of a therapist and doing what is best for you and your family.

Did want to extend my sympathies and that I'm thinking of you. I hope you find peace soon.

[Anonymous]

How old are you? While it doesn't change the economic reality of your situation, you have to consider how likely you are to be able to get pregnant again.

So if you're, say, 37+, your options may - and should - look different than at 27yo.

[Anonymous]

With HG you might qualify for disability benefits, from work or social security. Something that might help with the financial squeeze.
Since you talk about wanting kids later, it is a good idea to think through how you'd feel if you were unable to conceive later. There is something called Asherman
Syndrome that is worth knowing about. What if you got HG again? With this pregnancy at least 9 weeks are already over.

Good luck, you are in such a tough position. Trust yourself, deep down you know what's best for you among parenting, adoption, or termination.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, when I was a teenager I accidentally got pregnant. I went to Planned Parenthood. The person I spoke with had me do something that now, 20 years later, I still think was brilliant. She had me write out one month, six months, one year and six years from that date we were sitting there. Then she asked me to visualize how my life would be if I kept, gave up for adoption, and aborted. It really helped me to see how my life would change and the different directions different decisions would control. Before doing that, everything seemed kind of fuzzy to me, but afterwards it all got very clear and there was an obvious choice for me. That was the option I acted on, and I have never for one second regretted it.

What great advice... Thanks for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Hugs, OP. Best of luck with whatever you decide to do

[Anonymous]

OP you need to brace for the HG to get worse before it gets better, after 5 days on IV fluids & IV meds if you don't keep any food down you will need to be hospitalized and receive TPN (it's more or less a feeding tube but via IV & PICC line) I just went through this with a very wanted pregnancy and it almost destroyed our family. I spent six weeks in the hospital (200k in medical bills thankfully we have good insurance and are only on the hook for 5k) I am still on IV drugs & fluids at 28 weeks and unable to work, we've racked up some credit card debt since I've had to put my older child in daycare but don't have any income coming in to cover it. I'm saying this because several times (at 8 and 14 weeks we considered very seriously termination) and in your situation I would recommend that option. I will be having my tubes tied after this pregnancy
because HG is shower to get worse each time.