What do you call your MIL?

[Anonymous]

I call my MIL by her first name. It's actually pretty awful because her name is "Catherine", but I can't figure out whether she prefers Cathy or Kate (so many people call her both). I usually avoid her name just because it sounds weird for me to say it and I think I've got the wrong nickname. blah. We've been together for 6 years...

I have a very close relationship with my mom and don't want to ever call anyone else that name. It really stresses me out that my MIL wants me to call her mom. I just can't!!

[Anonymous]

sounds like she wants you to call her mom but isnt going to have the actual conversation with you about it. its not wrong for you to not want to call her mom and she may always continue to sign that way hoping soemday you will change your mind.
i call mine by their first names. my fil would probably love me to call him dad and my mil would probably love for me to continue calling her mes x forever.

[Anonymous]

It's "old school" politeness that you don't call people who are old enough to be your parents, by their first name. They aren't our peers. Matter of your upbringing.
I wish we had something else to call MIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL does this. I call her by her first name. Not a big deal.

This is my situation (I'm DH), and doesn't at all signal that she wants to be called "mom."

[Anonymous]

Susan

[Anonymous]

Mrs. Greenblatt

DH (then boyfriend) introduced us. "This is my mom, Barbara."

Barbara promptly said, "I prefer to be addressed as Mrs. Greenblatt."

And so she is.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Ok, I'm probably making too much of it. It's just awkward that I always call her, let's say Jane, and she calls herself Mom like when she calls she says hi it's Mom. I'm probably overly sensitive because my Mom and I are really close but I'll just carry on calling her Jane. I'm far from perfect but not DIL from hell. My MIL is very controlling though.

[Anonymous]

OP this does not address your issue but just to offer another cultural perspective, we call FIL & MIL by terms in our language that mean father or mother.

It does not mean that they are "replacing" my biological parents but it is more in the way of an honorary and respectful term.

[Anonymous]

I call my MIL [Last Name] Mom, as in "Smith Mom." It's always been kind of a joke for us, because that's what DH lists his parents as in his address book, which we all find kind of funny. It makes her feel maternal, but doesn't make me feel like I'm calling her "mom" in a way that replaces my mom. We have a pretty easy going relationship though. Still, I find that it's a good compromise.

[Anonymous]

Mom. I'm Asian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's "old school" politeness that you don't call people who are old enough to be your parents, by their first name. They aren't our peers. Matter of your upbringing.
I wish we had something else to call MIL.

This is why I really had a hard time calling my MIL by her first name, even though this is what she told me to call her. I just felt (and still feel) very disrespectful when I do this. My DH and I have almost been married 10 years. I was very relieved once we had a child so I could just call her, "Grammie"! That feels better to me!

[Anonymous]

"Crazy Bitch"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To her face? Or when I talk about her here? I have different words for each situation.

LOL, me too. I assume OP means FirstName not Lady CrayCray.

[Anonymous]

LOL, me too. I assume OP means FirstName not [/b]Lady CrayCray[b].

Wow. Twelve years old and a child already. Seriously, no one uses cray cray beyond their Tweens.

[Anonymous]

I call my mom "Mom" and my MIL "Mother". Works for us.