Sister does not understand the impact of her dogs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like you got the raw end of the deal as far as reciprocity for childcare but feeling like you've thousands because of it is just weird.

Also, why doesn't she watch your kids at your house?

It is just odd, visiting and staying out in the driveway.
It is not so much the money, as much as it is the parade of strangers coming through our house to babysit.
Also, she will not come to my house to babysit, which is understandable since it can be a whole day affair.

Parade of strangers? She won't come to your nearby house to sit? This is either BS or you and your sister are both annoying and deserve each other.

[Anonymous]

I'm going with annoying and deserve each other

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sympathize with the fact that you looked forward to a close relationship with your sister and children, and that you resent that her apparent thoughtlessness over her dogs' behavior has brought a stop to all this.

My best friend and I were always in and out of each others' houses, until she and her husband decided to get a HUGE dog. More like a 90 lbs calf, with a nuclear bark, and a badly-behaved habit of putting her saucer-sized paws on your chest and lick your face. She pushes and licks my toddler's face aggressively the rare times she can get at her, and what does my friend do? Coos at her lovingly to stop.
My friend just. does. not. get. it.
This is after I repeatedly explained that her dog should not be in my toddler's face like this.

We cannot go to her house anymore, and I feel sad that my family has been "displaced" my their inability to control their dog.

So many people do not understand how to train dogs, it's worrying.

Thanks for understanding. I felt like it was a "takes a village" kind of a set up, but it is not. I actually bought a house close by to hers.
Even in emergencies, we can't take a chance...and that is what is really sad. When I was hospitalized, we called a sitetr who sent her daughter, who we had never met before.
I wish that on all fronts people would try to understand why these off putting situations can be deal breakers.

[Anonymous]

I'd be more concerned about the loser boyfriend being around your kids than the dogs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I sympathize with the fact that you looked forward to a close relationship with your sister and children, and that you resent that her apparent thoughtlessness over her dogs' behavior has brought a stop to all this.

My best friend and I were always in and out of each others' houses, until she and her husband decided to get a HUGE dog. More like a 90 lbs calf, with a nuclear bark, and a badly-behaved habit of putting her saucer-sized paws on your chest and lick your face. She pushes and licks my toddler's face aggressively the rare times she can get at her, and what does my friend do? Coos at her lovingly to stop.
My friend just. does. not. get. it.
This is after I repeatedly explained that her dog should not be in my toddler's face like this.

We cannot go to her house anymore, and I feel sad that my family has been "displaced" my their inability to control their dog.

So many people do not understand how to train dogs, it's worrying.

Thanks for understanding. I felt like it was a "takes a village" kind of a set up, but it is not. I actually bought a house close by to hers.
Even in emergencies, we can't take a chance...and that is what is really sad. When I was hospitalized, we called a sitetr who sent her daughter, who we had never met before.
I wish that on all fronts people would try to understand why these off putting situations can be deal breakers.

You're doing right by your kids, and that's the most important thing. If your sister can't control her dog and the dog is a loose canon who has bitten people in the past you can't take a chance with your kids. They come first for you. It's unfortunate that the situation isn't what you had hoped it would be, but this is what's right for you and your kids.

[Anonymous]

IF you're real, your a nut. Your sister is the reason you've spent thousands on childcare? Ha! Your poor children, with a parent like you.

[Anonymous]

I hate to think of you losing a child because you're concerned about someone else and their dogs.

There is no debating:

Don't take your kids there. Period. Its not worth it. You have a gut feeling happening here. Be a good mom, follow your gut instinct, and move on.

Its that simple.

[Anonymous]

OP-I don't live near my sister but when I saw the subject line I almost laughed because it sounded like I wrote it. We never go in her house because of her two dogs. Once we went in and my DD was young and one jumped on her and scared her so badly. They are not friendly cozy dogs-they are loud and leap toward you. Also she can never ever visit anyone or go on trips with us because she never has anyone to watch the dogs (no one ever wants to) and she refuses to put them in a kennel. I just dont plan for her to join in anymore so I'm not dissapointed.

[Anonymous]

All of you who are complaining, did you ever stop to think that maybe the reason these people got the dogs was so they wouldn't have to deal with your kids? You all act like you should be entitled to take your annoying kids anywhere you like. Getting a dog was the best thing that happened to us because a family member stopped bringing her kids over for us to watch EVERY CHANCE SHE GOT. You chose to have kids now deal with the responsibility.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe the Judgey McJudgersons today. OP admits this is more of a rant. But put aside your thoughts about OP's entitlement or that she should've budgeted for childcare when she had kids. Put yourselves in OP's shoes--this isn't just a friend she helped out in previous years, this is OP's sister. OP wanted to be near her and have an aunt around to help make a larger family for her kids. It's not about getting reciprocated for the free childcare she gave in previous years (though that would certainly be nice!!).

If OP's kids are under 10, then I'm not surprised if they tend to cause pandemonium. PPs who think the kids are the problem probably are lucky that their kids inherited calm and pliable personalities and easy temperaments. But a lot of kids aren't like that.

OP, my sympathies--my good friend's nephew was attacked badly by another family member's dog. Caused massive scarring and he'll need several surgeries to his face when he's older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be more concerned about the loser boyfriend being around your kids than the dogs.

+100

Dangerous dogs, like ridiculous cars and weapons, are nothing but low forms of self improvement. This guy sounds like a loser. Probably can't do succeed when it comes to the portably stuff so he compensates with attack dogs (and yeah I know there are people who love their little pitties and rotties, yada yada). Stay away from her house. She's a moron and the bf could care less if a kid including her kids get bitten.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be more concerned about the loser boyfriend being around your kids than the dogs.

+100

Dangerous dogs, like ridiculous cars and weapons, are nothing but low forms of self improvement. This guy sounds like a loser. Probably can't do succeed when it comes to the portably stuff so he compensates with attack dogs (and yeah I know there are people who love their little pitties and rotties, yada yada). Stay away from her house. She's a moron and the bf could care less if a kid including her kids get bitten.

Meant to say probably can't succeed when it comes to important stuff

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She had two pit bulls, now has one.
We kept our kids away from the house when she had the first one and said to ourselves, that when it dies, we would be able to go over. Bring in a new boyfriend who is not the most responsible, he buys a new pit bull puppy. We were sad because we knew that we would have to wait that one out. Sis is not in love with the dogs, but was talked into them. Dog #2 has attacked me and bitten me.
That said, we feel that it is a dangerous place for our kids who don't always think and never listen. DS has a way of provoking pandemonium.
We took care of her kids for endless hours when they were young, and now, as we have young children, we hoped that she would reciprocate with care. She offers, but we have to decline, and we tell her that it is because of the dog(s). She always says that she will put it away, but someone always forgets and it gets out (that is how I got bitten).
This is just really a rant since we have spend thousands on childcare because of this one issue, frustrating.

It does not work that way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All of you who are complaining, did you ever stop to think that maybe the reason these people got the dogs was so they wouldn't have to deal with your kids? You all act like you should be entitled to take your annoying kids anywhere you like. Getting a dog was the best thing that happened to us because a family member stopped bringing her kids over for us to watch EVERY CHANCE SHE GOT. You chose to have kids now deal with the responsibility.

I agree with this. I'd be way more worried about OP's "kids who don't always think and never listen" biting me than dogs. Maybe your kids are worse than hers, not as similar as you think, and she doesn't want them around.

[Anonymous]

Your sister doesn't owe you childcare. It doesn't matter what you did for her. Unless you only did it based on the explicit understanding that she would rearrange her life for your kids.

I'm not a fan of pit bulls, but your post really seems entitled. Your angry because her dogs get in the way of you getting free childcare.