Am I overreacting? MIL took DD (6) to Weight Watchers meeting.

Anonymous
Honestly if she is sitting watching Netflix with headphones I would be fine with it. WW isn't about strict dieting or excessive exercise so even if she hears a bit it is pretty likely to be healthy info.

I think this might be more about your eating issues as I wouldn't even think twice about it but I have a healthy relationship with food.

I would tell my DD what it is about in basic terms and ask her about it afterwards but if going with MIL means watching Netflix during a WW meeting, then so be it.
Anonymous
I wouldn't worry about it.

My impression is that Weight Watchers focuses on healthy eating and moderation; not on attaining a skinny body by starving yourself. So I don't think the message would be negative for a kid.

I'm sure people discuss things like eating for emotional reasons as opposed to hunger, et cetera.

Personally, I think ballet classes are more dangerous for a young girl with regard to eating disorders than going to a WW meeting with grandma.
Anonymous
OP here- Okay- thanks all. Sometimes it's hard for me to get outside of my head (especially with this topic)- which is why I posted here.

No, my MIL isn't trying to send DD a message. She has stated on several occasions that DD has healthier eating habits than she does. DD is fit and strong.

About the headphones- she has ones I found through the Discovery store that limits the decibel level no matter what she's listening too.

Oh and sorry for the double post. I originally posted in off topic then couldn't find it when it was moved to this forum (hard to search on my phone).
Anonymous
I wouldnt be ok with it, and I've done ww and lost a healthy amount of weight. At my meetings there was a lot of talk about sugar substitutes and artificial stuff and being "skinny". Obsessing over going over your daily points by eating too many grapes. ( earlier version of the program). I just don't think a kid needs to hear that. Reinforcing healthy eating, junk food as special treats, and exercising to keep out lungs and heart healthy is more age appropriate than worrying about too many grapes or how to survive that upcoming wedding weekend, food wise. Not the same as running errands to the bank or grocery store.
Anonymous
OP, with your background regarding food, I think it is inappropriate of MIL to do this with your DD. With all the other things she could be doing, she chooses this. Seems passive aggressive to me. I would say no. And I do not have issues with weight or food.
Anonymous
I have zero issue with this. I would actually think of it as a positive thing. My mom has always struggled with her weight and is open with my kids that she did not make good choices for a long time and never developed a good habit of exercise. She compliments us on the good choices we make. The kids are understanding about her struggles and in no way embarrassed by it.

So Grandma and her friends are working hard to have good habits. Why is that a bad thing? It's not like they are going to a strip joint or a drug buy.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The meetings are completely innocuous. The leader will chat about what's going on in the program, do her little lecture/theme of the month, give out stickers to anyone who dropped some weight, entertains some questions about the point system/nutrition, and that's it. There's no shaming, name calling, or catharsis going on. Lighten up. You are putting your fucked up notions of body image onto her. And what's so shameful about being overweight anyway?


Are you kidding me? Do you live in our society?



Yes, I live in our society. And I'm overweight. And I refuse to be ashamed of it. I'm not going to walk around like I've committed a crime just because I carry some extra weight on my body.


Anonymous
I don't think it's appropriate.

Just because MIL watches the child it doesn't mean the child has to go everywhere she goes - AA meeting, funeral, what else? An OB/GYN check up?

MIL can just say she has to go places on such days and get a babysitter.
Anonymous
It doesn't sound like a big deal to me. She'd be bored out of her mind listening to the meeting. Netflix was a good idea. It's not like ww is teaching people to have an eating disorder. There is nothing inappropriate going on at these meetings.
Anonymous
i've never been to a ww meeting but it would depend on the topic of conversation. i wouldn't want her to overhear people's emotional ties and difficulties to food. but i would be ok if it was just about healthy recipes and exercises.
Anonymous
I've been to a lot of WW meetings and I do not think they are appropriate for children, even those wearing headphones.

Before the meeting, everyone has to step on a scale for an employee, who then records the weights and often makes a comment about them (well done, hard week?, you're down 11 pounds total now, etc.). Kid will definitely see this and almost certainly hear it, as it happens on the way in to the meeting so kid won't yet be plugged into the electronics.

Depending on the facility, there may be posters on the walls about foods, their point value, advertising WW brand snacks, etc.

The meetings are definitely not only about general good choices. They are about weight loss. People are called out specifically for losing certain amounts of weight. Before holidays, the topic is how to make it through the holidays while not eating too much. Even with headphones, a kid is going to hear this, and a 6-year-old is going to be able to figure out what's going on.

That said, what are your choices? If MIL is a rich society lady who just isn't thinking when she is out for a fun day with her grandchild, I would be more forceful about asking her not to take the kid than I would if both mom and MIL work full time and together cobble together child care on each other's days and shifts off. In that case, MIL has limited opportunities to attend the meetings and some flexibility might be in order.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The meetings are completely innocuous. The leader will chat about what's going on in the program, do her little lecture/theme of the month, give out stickers to anyone who dropped some weight, entertains some questions about the point system/nutrition, and that's it. There's no shaming, name calling, or catharsis going on. Lighten up. You are putting your fucked up notions of body image onto her. And what's so shameful about being overweight anyway?


Are you kidding me? Do you live in our society?



Yes, I live in our society. And I'm overweight. And I refuse to be ashamed of it. I'm not going to walk around like I've committed a crime just because I carry some extra weight on my body.


Hear, here. Body shape is NOT a moral issue. Beibg more fat than others should not be a source of shame.
Anonymous
NOT a big deal that she brings your daughter-imo!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here- Okay- thanks all. Sometimes it's hard for me to get outside of my head (especially with this topic)- which is why I posted here.

No, my MIL isn't trying to send DD a message. She has stated on several occasions that DD has healthier eating habits than she does. DD is fit and strong.

About the headphones- she has ones I found through the Discovery store that limits the decibel level no matter what she's listening too.

Oh and sorry for the double post. I originally posted in off topic then couldn't find it when it was moved to this forum (hard to search on my phone).


I'm the PP who posted about the headphones. Thanks for clarifying. These sound helpful. I'll have to look into them.
Anonymous
I can't imagine what the problem is. She will see people with a weight problem working on their weight? Okay... (BTW, not everyone at WW is a Fatty BoBatty. Many people there have just a few pounds to lose and look "normal.")

She will hear tips about nutrition. Okay...

She will hear people discussing recipes. Okay...

This isn't Alcoholics Anonymous with people talking about tales of the gutter and relapse and sin and hitting rock bottom. This is Weight Watchers!
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