MIL Intentionally Sends my Kids TONS of Candy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Take out the treats and dole them out to your children over time. If you have the king size bar, cut off a bite for each of them and put the rest in a ziploc baggie. Give them a piece say, once a week. If your MIL is sending more than this, next time you see her tell her "Thank you so much for the treats. My friends at the office *LOVE* them." If she mentions that she bought them for the kids, just say "Really? Well, I mentioned that the kids can't have that much sugar so I save a few bites for their once/week treat and then send the rest to the office." She can then deal or stop sending them. When someone wants to push your buttons, the worst thing you can do is express exasperation because that's a sign they succeeded. If you don't let it bother you (or at least don't let her know that it bothers you), she'll stop spending money on sophomoric games.

+1 This is what I do with my MIL, when she intentionally overbuys TOO many clothes for my DD. I take a few, I return a few (luckily, she includes the gift receipts), I regift a few, I give some to my sisters for their daughters, etc. I NEVER show exasperation. That is what my MIL wants. Just always be pleasant, cheerful, and polite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My children are very young elementary and are very sensitive to sugar -- they get just a little bit of candy or sugar and they are bouncing off the walls, and don't want to eat anything else. I am by no means anti-candy or anti-sugar, but DS has already had a cavity and DD is an underweight and very picky eater who would eat sugar all day every day if I let her. The basic point is that I am trying to take good care of the children and instill healthy eating habits. I certainly give them treats but only sparingly and I don't keep a big stash in the house. At this particular point in our lives, having a bunch of chocolate and candy stashed in the pantry just introduces whining and chaos that doesn't exist otherwise. MIL once brought over some chocolates (totally over the top king-sized chocolate bars) and saw that the kids were over the top happy, but then of course she wasn't around for the effects of the sugar rush or the spoiled appetites when it came time for dinner. I let it slide a time or two, chalking it up to the normal indulgences that grandmothers make on their children. But then I gently and politely explained to her that I really would prefer that she not send huge chocolates, candies and sugary sweets to the kids (which she mails them in care packages, directly to them), and she continues to do it. At first I thought she forgot, but then she laughed this bizarre laugh when I asked her about it again and now I feel like she is just doing it for sport. So unfortunately I have had to tell her that when a package from her arrives, that I am opening it first, removing the (copious amounts of) chocolates and candies, and then and only then giving the rest of what she's sent to the kids. I'm really annoyed that she's teeing up this ridiculous battle with me, and that she's so immature that she actually thinks this is funny.

OP, no offense, but I don't get why you just don't throw out the candy she sends through the mail. Problem solved. You tell your children what you want to tell them about the candy-(control what you want them to have) and pitch the rst of it. When MIL isn't there it's just so easy. It's a different story when she arrives with candy I do admit.

[Anonymous]

If this is your biggest problem with your MIL, count your blessings. You have complete control over this situation. My parents spoil my DD with sugar and I ration it out to her. Problem solved!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL always gives my DD cookies.

I think it's a cheap way to buy popularity.

Oh come on. It's a time-honored Grandma tradition. Were you raised by angry vegan wolves?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My MIL always gives my DD cookies.

I think it's a cheap way to buy popularity.

Oh come on. It's a time-honored Grandma tradition. Were you raised by angry vegan wolves?

Exactly. It irritates me that my DD eats more junk than I want her to because of my mom, but hell, my grandma had me hooked on Blueberry donuts from Dunkin Donuts. We went there as soon as they opened every Saturday morning and you know what? It's one of my fondest memories to date.

Grandmas spoil their grandchildren. I don't think they can help it!

[Anonymous]

This is not a big deal. Give your kids one or two small treats out of what she sends. Take the rest in for your office, or DH's office. People there will be happy to see it.