Kids Vacationing with ILs?
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Anonymous
Would MIL not do this if you explained why your DD needed to wear the full-coverage swimsuit? If MIL would disregard my instructions/concerns, then that would be the deciding factor for me and my child would not go. |
Anonymous
I agree. But I find it hard to believe your MIL would basically say - screw it, let the kids get burned. Are you sure you're not overstating your case here? |
Anonymous
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OP: If you aren't exaggerating about how little your MIL would care about sunblock or even thwart your attempts to send a more covering suit, I wouldn't send your daughter, for two reasons:
Melanoma is a real and very deadly thing. I have it. The damage in done very early in life and you only need one good burn, particularly if you are fair skinned. If your MIL disregards your concerns on sunscreen, what else is she disregarding/lax about? |
Anonymous
| OP, no, I wouldn't send my 7yo under these circumstances. My DD is 5.5 and I cannot really picture her being mature enough in 1.5 years for this type of thing. Others may think I am not permissive enough but if you don't feel comfortable with something, just listen to your own little voice and don't do it. Tell them, "Thank you so much, but we had plans for xyz while bro is at summer camp. Maybe next time!" (and if next time works out, great; if you don't feel right about it then either, no worries either; you are the parent so whatever you say, goes.) |
Anonymous
MIL is passive aggressive. She'd buy DD a pretty, frilly, licensed character swimsuit, cover DD once with sunblock, make a modest attempt to put a hat on her and possibly leave the beachif it got too hot. She'd probably keep DD under an umbrella, some of the time. All the while, she'll be indulging my daughter with gumballs, Laffy taffy and endless servings of fruit chews and 100 calorie snack packs. MIL told my oldest DD (teen) that the zip up/surfer-style swim suit that then 5 year old wore to the beach was "embarrassing" and "ugly." MIL bought younger DD a strappy, frilly one piece bathing suit as a birthday gift a few months ago. |
Anonymous
I guess I just don't see the problem with most of this. Grandparents indulge their grandchildren all the time. Didn't yours? I have fond memories of being fed butterscotch disks and ice cream at my grandmother's, two things I would rarely have gotten from my own mother. I also don't see the problem with a little girl having a "strappy, frilly one piece bathing suit." I find it hard to believe that the woman you describe as wanting to spoil your daughter with treats has so little regard for her that she would not take steps to prevent her from being sunburned. OP, I may be off base, but I think you are a big part of the problem here, that you just don't like your MIL, and that you are projecting and grasping for excuses not to allow your daughter to take a fun vacation with her grandparents. And I find that sad. |
Anonymous
PP mom of redheads here. I wouldn't have an issue with the food (even though it would annoy me) because in general, that's what kids love about grandparents - Laffy Taffy, etc. I would, however, have an issue with inattention to sunblock, which is a huge issue for me (as I wrote about above). Would MIL pay closer attention to sunblock, a hat and a cover-up if you impressed on her the importance of it for your DD? Would doctor's instructions make any difference? |
Anonymous
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She's seven, and there will be three adults present to care for her. If you're really that freaked out that they won't put sunscreen on her, enlist cousin's dad--"DD burns really easily and doesn't like to wear sunblock. Can you keep an eye out and make sure that she puts some on every time your girls reapply?"
You sound like you just don't like your MIL and you're anticipating all kinds of problems that may or may not even happen. Personally, I'd have jumped for a long weekend with my grandparents at that age. |