| Some things are learned the hard way and lessons learned might not be realized for years. But you never know and things might turn out well. Is he mature for his age? I know of guys who were mature for their age and dated older women, probably because they were more confident than girls their age, and of course, for the sex. But they got married young and are happily married today. |
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Um, this is every 17 year old boys dream come true. Mom, don't shatter it. Just make sure he is using protection.
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| Doesn't seem like a big deal to me. When I was 17, I dated a guy who was 22. We dated for 2 years until he got a job in Japan. Super nice guy, good relationship. We still keep in intermittent (though rare) contact by email/Christmas cards etc. to this date. |
| Worst nightmare? Really? Maybe if he was 7. Let it go. You are not making it any better with your overreaction. He must be very mature for his age if she is interested in him. Be proud of that. Next year when he goes to college he will date girls his own age and impress them with what he learned from being with a (slightly) older, (somewhat) more sophisticated woman, and I don't mean sex. |
I'm 40, DH is 35. I am clearly MIL's worst nightmare.
17 and 22 might not be ideal, but unless he's an older, but very immature, HS sophomore, I'd leave it alone. Any younger and I would have real issues, but I was away at college at 17 and making choices my mother wouldn't have liked (if she knew). |
| I agree with others, I dont think it's that big of a deal. Sure, it's less than ideal, but at least she's 22 and not 32. Make sure he has condoms and is using them. Other than that there is not much to be done. |
| I really don't see what the big deal is. He's 17, not 14. What will you do when he's 18 and he decides to date someone older? I mean, it doesn't make any difference regarding a broken heart just because he's older (unless you are under the impression that if he dated someone his own age they would never break up). As for sex, I don't understand why this freaks you out so much. Maybe if she was 30 yeah. But 22? No. Not that big of a deal. |
| I'm a woman who "dated" a 17- yr old boy when I was 22. We were really soul mates and mostly spent a lot of time wandering the woods together. Though he was exceptionally mature for his age (home schooled), I never allowed sex and told him he should wait to fall in love with someone his own age. The balance of power would have been too unequal and I cared for him too much to want him to have any regrets. He is happily married now and got married at 19! |
woman. not girl. woman. |
| They ARE lying to you about the relationship, for sure. But I still don't see the problem. Let it go OP. |
| You need to have a serious conversation with him about protection!! Condoms need to be available and he needs to know how to use them. You don't want to be a grandma do you? |
| Teen Dad! |
| Presumably OP has had the condom talk with her son before. When I was 17 (10 years ago...yikes!) There were a lot of people having sex with other 17 year olds |
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This is your worst nightmare? Not a car accident, cancer, suicide, home burning down, alien invasion? Your almost-18 year old dating a woman 5 years older?
Get a grip, lady. |
| This doesn't seem too terrible to me. Have you met the girl? Do you like her? Does she have a dating history of dating guys closer to her age? Is there some niche interest they share? |