teenagers and laundry

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't give him a day of the week. I think it is laziness for the other things you mentioned. Give him good habits now. I was really lazy as a teenager and my mother just didn't care (not saying that you don't), so it was really hard for me to break those habits as an adult who wanted a clean place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, OK thanks for the advice.
Sometimes he is plain lazy and puts things off.

One more question-would you have a set day of the week to have him do it on and then enforce it?
Thats what I was thinking but it sounds like you guys think I should just leave it be for him to handle.

He is quite an immature kid and has ADHD.


HE leaves his bath towel on his bathroom floor every day. He puts his clothes on the floor beside the hamper, instead of IN THE hamper.
He wont replace his toilet paper roll unless reminded. (He has his own washroom). Laziness or normal?

Lazy and normal!

Our 15yo and 13yo (boys) do their own laundry, and have for 2 years now. Yes, they leave it til the last minute. Yes, they've had to wear dirty clothes, but that happened only a couple of times after which they came straight home and did laundry. I don't even keep track anymore-it's totally their responsibility.

[Anonymous]

OP here, I really appreciate all the advice.
I will have him start doing his own laundry and I will totally back off.

The folding is the only thing he hasn't done before.

I might even start having my 11 (almost 12) year old do his own too.

[Anonymous]

My husband was an only child with a single mom. He always had his own bathroom. I find many of the tings he does that gross me out are attributable to him having had his own bathroom growing up and having a mom who probaly never checked on his spaces. His mother keeps her home in a manner I find disgusting but I do value cleanliness and tidiness highly. She does not.

I have had to really work on a few of the bad-habit-items in order to live with DH (toilet seat goes down, wet towels get hung up, dirty laundry goes IN the hamper) but, I also hired a weekly cleaning lady and a weekly lady to do some of the laundry and all the ironing in order to preserve our marriage.

DS will NOT be allowed to develop those same habits and neither will DD. Slovenly behavior is purely due to laziness and it is your job as a parent to teach your children proper habits. That includes cleanliness and neatness. Of course kids are lazy, that is natural. They can do what they want once they leave your house but you need to do your job as a mom/dad and instill these values.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband was an only child with a single mom. He always had his own bathroom. I find many of the tings he does that gross me out are attributable to him having had his own bathroom growing up and having a mom who probaly never checked on his spaces. His mother keeps her home in a manner I find disgusting but I do value cleanliness and tidiness highly. She does not.

I have had to really work on a few of the bad-habit-items in order to live with DH (toilet seat goes down, wet towels get hung up, dirty laundry goes IN the hamper) but, I also hired a weekly cleaning lady and a weekly lady to do some of the laundry and all the ironing in order to preserve our marriage.

DS will NOT be allowed to develop those same habits and neither will DD. Slovenly behavior is purely due to laziness and it is your job as a parent to teach your children proper habits. That includes cleanliness and neatness. Of course kids are lazy, that is natural. They can do what they want once they leave your house but you need to do your job as a mom/dad and instill these values.

How old are your kids?
I used to say the same things. Get off your high horse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have him do his own laundry. If he runs out of clean clothes, then he runs out.

My 9 year old does her own and understands these consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband was an only child with a single mom. He always had his own bathroom. I find many of the tings he does that gross me out are attributable to him having had his own bathroom growing up and having a mom who probaly never checked on his spaces. His mother keeps her home in a manner I find disgusting but I do value cleanliness and tidiness highly. She does not.

I have had to really work on a few of the bad-habit-items in order to live with DH (toilet seat goes down, wet towels get hung up, dirty laundry goes IN the hamper) but, I also hired a weekly cleaning lady and a weekly lady to do some of the laundry and all the ironing in order to preserve our marriage.

DS will NOT be allowed to develop those same habits and neither will DD. Slovenly behavior is purely due to laziness and it is your job as a parent to teach your children proper habits. That includes cleanliness and neatness. Of course kids are lazy, that is natural. They can do what they want once they leave your house but you need to do your job as a mom/dad and instill these values.

How old are your kids?
I used to say the same things. Get off your high horse.

No high horse here. My kids are 12 and 9 and I work on them constantly. At times I am frustrated with their laziness but at others it really pays off. They are starting to get it and notice when things need to be done. It is hard work getting them to have good habits for me too, you know but, I knew that was part of parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, OK thanks for the advice.
Sometimes he is plain lazy and puts things off.

One more question-would you have a set day of the week to have him do it on and then enforce it?
Thats what I was thinking but it sounds like you guys think I should just leave it be for him to handle.

He is quite an immature kid and has ADHD.


HE leaves his bath towel on his bathroom floor every day. He puts his clothes on the floor beside the hamper, instead of IN THE hamper.
He wont replace his toilet paper roll unless reminded. (He has his own washroom). Laziness or normal?

Lazy and normal!

Our 15yo and 13yo (boys) do their own laundry, and have for 2 years now. Yes, they leave it til the last minute. Yes, they've had to wear dirty clothes, but that happened only a couple of times after which they came straight home and did laundry. I don't even keep track anymore-it's totally their responsibility.

+1 to the lazy AND normal. My husband is 36 and still does all those things. He actually does the laundry more often than not in our house, but the fact that he considers a load to be "done" when it is stuffed into a laundry basket or piled onto the sofa in the basement, unfolded and completely wrinkled, is becoming a bone of contention in our house.

But I digress. We all started having to do our own laundry as kids once we started caring about what was clean and when. That was around 12 for me and my sister, around 14 for my brother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, OK thanks for the advice.
Sometimes he is plain lazy and puts things off.

One more question-would you have a set day of the week to have him do it on and then enforce it?
Thats what I was thinking but it sounds like you guys think I should just leave it be for him to handle.

He is quite an immature kid and has ADHD.


HE leaves his bath towel on his bathroom floor every day. He puts his clothes on the floor beside the hamper, instead of IN THE hamper.
He wont replace his toilet paper roll unless reminded. (He has his own washroom). Laziness or normal?

Why on earth would you remind him to replace his toilet paper in his own bathroom? How on earth will he learn if you keep hovering over him? Lay off, lady. BTW, if I were you, I'd start dropping MY bath towel on his bathroom floor every day after my shower. When he asked why, I'd say, "Oh! That's where you put yours, so I thought that's what we're doing now." Kids can take hints.

[Anonymous]

OP here, he still has not changed that roll of toilet paper.
His hamper is overflowing but it has not dawned on him to do laundry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, he still has not changed that roll of toilet paper.
His hamper is overflowing but it has not dawned on him to do laundry.

Interesting. I thought since he seems to love clean clothes, he'd be more motivated. Wait him out!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, he still has not changed that roll of toilet paper.
His hamper is overflowing but it has not dawned on him to do laundry.

Interesting. I thought since he seems to love clean clothes, he'd be more motivated. Wait him out!

I will wait it out. He is driving me mad though.
I guess as long as he still has some clean clothes, he isn't interested in doing laundry.

[Anonymous]

In the future, buy fewer clothes. Enough for 5-6 days without laundry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the future, buy fewer clothes. Enough for 5-6 days without laundry.

Good plan.

[Anonymous]

Don't worry OP, he'll get the hang of it! My 8 yo has ADHD and I have to remind him of these things constantly. But he improves slowly.