Short older sibling developing sensitivities about tall younger sib- any advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the oldest and shortest in the family. I think this is one of those instances where you just tell her we can't control how tall we grow- all we can do is eat healthy food and be happy with who we are. Is one of you short? If so, I'd say, see, you're built more like I am (and my sisters) or whatever, and little bro takes after so-and-so, because we're all different, blah blah.

I could have written this. I'm older and shorter than my sister and I hated it growing up. I hated how people always thought she was older. So just try and separate out height = age and teach something of genetics - maybe with eye or hair color? Good luck.

[Anonymous]

My kids are grown, and the oldest is the shortest by quite a bit.

My younger brother passed me by in height around age 8.

It really does not matter.

Do NOT point out to your daughter that she "surpasses" her brother in other ways. This is the kind of thing that fuels sibling rivalry.

Read "Siblings with out Rivalry" for good ideas. Your kids are different (ages, genders, height, interests) Focus on what they have in common and like to do together.

[Anonymous]

I am in this predicament I have 3 children 12 who is Luca twins aged 10. We always thought Lucas the oldest was abit short for his age especially during his early years at school. Something made him question as to why he was still one of the shortest in his class. He pointed out that the boys were all taller than him and there were only 3 short girls. For some reason he gelled more with these shorter classmates. He must have been 6 and one of the boys said he was too short to play and might get hurt. I was more sad than Lucas. We were already going a height chart for the 3 of them anyway. Had my mum also did it. Lucas was still taller than the twins so I wasn't too worried. I just thought older siblings were taller. We left it till 2 years as there are hardly any growth. So we got him checked out it started off ok. My height 5'1 his dad 5'6. Grandparents 5'0 nan ,4'11 nan, 5'6 g.dad lastly 5'0 g.dad. The consultant said it maybe to do with the shorter family members . I asked for the test to make him feel better. I was thinking well 5'0 isn't no big deal we can handle that. It turns out that it was worse than what we thought. His bone structure was measured to get a more accurate measurement done. We were all there the twins and my husband. We were told that on all these tests his height is going to be between 4'6 and no taller than 4'8. He explained to expect the shorter height. Now with the twins with us he measured them but he could tell they are both fine. He asked if he could measure them and compare them all. Well we all knew the twins were taller by 3 inches. Lucas just wanted to know properly what is happening. The consultant said that his growth plates are closing but at a slow pace and should get abit more taller. He thought there might be something which could help. When they mentioned breaking the legs and letting the bone grow back. This would only give him 3 inches so no way for all that pain. I couldn't put him through that. So least we know what to expect. Over the next few years Lucas was about to go to the local high school. Most of the kids there would have known him. All his uniform was altered the black trousers no problem as I picked up the younger aged ones. He could get away with a pair aged 7 and a short take up. She 6 was abit short. The blazer was the worst for him they did a really good job on it. The school shoes were a size 9 which had not grown for a while. The 3 girls from his school were 3 inches taller than him. When he started his height was measured at 4'4. It turns out there was a similar boy who was short like him and the same age. Then there was a girl that was short. All their schoolbags were little they could just about fit their books in it. They were allowed to leave there classes 5 mins before the others as they were always knocked into. I must point out though all through this Lucas took it very well. Watching his 2 younger siblings grow taller than him didn't phase him. He already knew. Obviously some things he can't do in p.e . He can't compete with them. The school as a counsellor there to help these shorter pupils if there are problems..This is quite good as the woman has restricted growth and has told them how things can make it easier. The school as been very helpful so no complaints. Lucas and his friends didn't want to do the height measurement at school. He knew because of his height he will be the shortest boy in both the youngest and shortest in the year.Then they mixed the girls in. 4 in total were short out of them all. He is coming up to 13 and his height is 4'5 I can't see him getting to 4'6. The twins have been great with him. If someone says to Lucas how old he is his sister Paula butts in and says he is out big brother. She is always giving him a hug and helping him if he wants something. He as 2 stools 1 in the kitchen and 1 in the bathroom. .sorry if it's too long

[Anonymous]

I have twins aged 10 now and both different in many ways. Both are boys the only difference being is their height. Luke is the taller at 4'10 and Mark is 4'6. We realised there was a problem when he wasn't keeping up with Luke. We decided to check it out he had tests and the results came back that he may not be growing as he should and they have predicted a height for him at no taller than 4'10 if that. He understands what is wrong and tries his hardest keeping up. The thing now is my daughter who is 8 is now Marks height . Laura came home last week from school saying some kids at school were being nasty calling Mark names. It really upset her and not Mark. Mark wanted to chat to us and he said he accepted that his sister will grow taller than him and he is ok with it. So we feel he will be ok with his height it's just seems to be other people's problem and not his..