| No regrets here - Do it! |
| Most women I know who SAH who are happy are motivated by wanting to be with their children as much as possible, not because they aren't crazy about their job. If your primary motivation is escaping a ho-hum job, you may be bitterly disappointed by being a SAHM. Aside from the fact that it's hard work, you will also forgo the kind of interaction with other adults and career challenges a job can offer. Also, it is hard to get back into the workforce once you've been out for a while - even for savvy, educated women. That said, if you want to be a SAHM and really have a pull toward it so that you can be with your kids, go for it. You live once and sounds like your DH makes enough to support you. |
| I officially hate dcum for making me feel so poor. Ridiculous. |
+1 |
| I don't get your concern. Without having to worry about money, you could do anything with your time--SAH, volunteer, work a low paying job that feeds other needs... what's the issue? If you're bored, your job is ho-hum, then quit. But it doesn't sound like you'd be happy staying home--and I'm judging that based on the facts that your kid(s) were not mentioned as your reason for staying home. I'm home because I enjoying being home with my kids and don't want to miss out on this time with them. |
| What's your fallback if something god forbid were to happen to your husband? |
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Can you go part-time? Or find a similar part-time position? Maybe working part-time remotely from another area, since it sounds like there may not be other positions available in this area? I would think through the work thing more. If you had a more fulfilling job would you want to keep working?
For me personally I don't regret it most days (except the occasional crazy day). Our salaries weren't as disparate so the income hit was more significant. BUT in the end I much rather spend time with my kids while they are little then go back to my ho hum job. I also wanted our whole family not to be rushing around. Life is short and I wanted to actually slow down to enjoy it. So it wasn't 100% about the kids, also for me as well. I still keep in touch with my former co-workers. And have briefly thought about some job opportunities they have brought up. But until my youngest is in school I won't even consider part-time. Good luck deciding - it's a tough one! |
DH is a cop too. Money is always a concern, but we make do. If we had the kind of income you had, there would be no question that I would stay home. I do, SAH, since it's our priority for our kids. If you can stay home, I think that you owe it to your children to do so. |
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I'll be the voice of dissent. I left my job to sah and have since returned to work. Staying home is HARD. You say you have no time to yourself now. That will only get worse if you sah, at least while the kids are little. I don't regret my time at home but am so much happier back at work, and looking back should have gone back sooner.
You might just need a different job. That was the case for me. I know you said there aren't many jobs here in your field, but maybe you could look in related fields. |
| NO. |
| Don't regret it at all. Hard decision to make but it has been the best thing for our family, even beyond what I thought the benefits would be. |
I know no one ever imagines being in my shoes, but after eight years of parenting, my STBX decided to leave. Doesnt like being a parent. I'll eventually get money, but no help or support. The minimum required by law for the amount of time required by law. There was a day five years ago where I almost quit work and today I am very relieved I didn't, if for no other reason that I get a break each day and have someone else to make a few meals each week. But, because I have an income, my kids will get a college education as my gift to them. Otherwise they would be on their own. No advice. Just sharing why I'm glad I didn't choose with my heart. |
Ditto. |
What are you talking about? She said her kids are her number one priority now and that she wants someone to be there when they get home from school. OP - don't know how far off elementary school is, but I would probably quit once they get to school and then start doing volunteer work, PTA, take classes, etc. |
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I loved the time with my kids when they were pre-elementary aged. We had a busy schedule and a lovely rhythm to our days.
Now though, I can't find a job, I am bored and desperate to work, my ILs don't respect me and make comments to me about not working. I want to work so much, for my physical and mental health, for our financial health, for the health of my marriage, for the opportunities for my kids that more $$ would provide. Looking back, there are ways I could have stayed more marketable. I am networking, applying, working on this every day. I do have a possible iron in the fire though. Wish me luck, I am waiting to hear. They called me for salary requirements, so it sounds positive. |