what to say to a friend who's divorcing?

[Anonymous]

there is a joke on that , poor the other woman whos getting the looser, you are free to start again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just heard via email from an old friend that she and her husband are separating (amicably, she says) and plan to divorce. They've been married 25 years and their children are both in college. It's not like DH and I haven't had other friends split up, but this one is really a shock. What to say under the cirucmstances? With other friends, I've been able to say, "I know things have been tough for a while, etc.", but I'm at a loss here.

I would actually take it as a positive sign if it was amicable. Two people built a life together, raised children well, but realize that with life expectancy rising that they really don't want the same things anymore - maybe one wants to live in a different part of the country and retire while the other does not. What would I say? It is always sad when something ends but you have so much life ahead of you that I wish the best and please count on my if you need anything.

A nice butterflies and fairy tales scenario, but the fact is, 80% of the time, there is another man/woman in the picture. Most likely one of them is with someone else, so just listen and let the story unfold. Be there, and be prepared for your friend to elaborate that it "is amicable" and by the way, I'd like you to meet Pat, who had absolutely NOTHING to do with the divorce.