Can a workaholic be reformed?

[Anonymous]

Maybe the key then is to find other ways to keep busy. Schedule activities with your kids, or nights out with friends, sign up for a class... enrich yourself in other ways besides work.

It sounds healthy to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for your thoughts so far. I am not *truly* a workaholic in that I don't work until I'm sick, and I don't think my family life has suffered due to work. It's more that I get so much of my identity from my work. I used to have interests outside of work like books, running races, cooking, and entertaining. Now I barely make time for minimal exercise and cooking. All of my time is taken up by work and my family, but that really doesn't seem very different from most of the working mothers I know. I definitely live to work rather than working to live.

I am really tempted by the new offer, but I guess I worry that once I downshift career-wise, it's hard to ramp back up in the future if I am unfulfilled at the new job. And as ashamed as I am to admit it, I take pride in my current job, and I worry that friends and colleagues will perceive the new position as a step down. Of course that is really stupid, but there it is.

15:40 here, you sound a lot like me. It took me a while to be able to make the switch because not only myncolleagues and friends saw my new position as a step down, I do as well. In the end, however, I'll be reading a book, painting and spending time with my family on Labor Day, while my old colleagues will be at work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for your thoughts so far. I am not *truly* a workaholic in that I don't work until I'm sick, and I don't think my family life has suffered due to work. It's more that I get so much of my identity from my work. I used to have interests outside of work like books, running races, cooking, and entertaining. Now I barely make time for minimal exercise and cooking. All of my time is taken up by work and my family, but that really doesn't seem very different from most of the working mothers I know. I definitely live to work rather than working to live.

I am really tempted by the new offer, but I guess I worry that once I downshift career-wise, it's hard to ramp back up in the future if I am unfulfilled at the new job. And as ashamed as I am to admit it, I take pride in my current job, and I worry that friends and colleagues will perceive the new position as a step down. Of course that is really stupid, but there it is.

OP, you're probably doing okay with minimal exercise now but the long term effects of not exercising regularly can really wear you down. In my forties, I exercised occasionally due to work and family responsibilities but when I started getting back into regular exercise in my 50s, it was pretty tough. But now that I'm working out regularly, I feel fabulous! I can really see the difference in my personal well-being compared to other people my age.

All this is to say that I spent many years putting off exercise because of how busy I was. And some of that is unavoidable. But some of that was just not making it a priority and not understanding how important it was to my well-being. My advice for younger moms is don't put exercise on the back burner. As you age, you will feel so much better for the years that you exercised - even if it is only going for a walk every day, it will make a difference.