Inappropriate behavior in niece - what to do

[Anonymous]

You mentioned that your niece has some kind of diagnosis - Asperger's possibly. Sounds like that is this case, although I know we can't really judge that based on your post. But, children with Asperger's tend to have trouble identifying other's reactions and emotions, and frequently don't quite get what's appropriate in social situations.

If your girls are so close, then you must be close with her parents. So, couldn't you casually say, "You know, ______ asked me about bisexuality today." Is your husband close with this sister - for more uncomfortable situations, like the missing frog, couldn't he tell her what happened? If my child let the frog out of the tank, I would want to know so I could address that type of thing I think it's more about the tone - if your SIL feels like you're judging or attacking then of course she'll be upset. But, if you genuinely have a good relationship, then it's not you saying, "Wow, your kid is weird," but simply sharing as parents. Also, if the niece brings up these things at inappropriate times, you could be a good model for her, by telling her that you'd be happy to continue the conversation at home, but that it's not appropriate to talk about in public, as the PP suggested.

It would be a shame for them to lose their friendship, when again, most of the things you described, seem exactly like Asperger's and most children with that need a bit more guidance navigating the social world. Her questions aren't dangerous.