do people still send thank-you notes these days? what is the current thinking on this topic?

[Anonymous]

If someone spends time, money and thought to buy someone a gift, you need to write a thank you card. My son has to been to may birthday parties and has only received thank you notes from about half of the kids. Most of the time, gifts aren't even opened at the parties so who knows if the card got separated from the gift, etc. I just think it is plain rude not to acknowledge a gift. I make sure my son writes thank you notes within a week of getting a gift. The only pass I give is for a new mom. If I give a shower gift before the baby arrives, I do expect a note but if I give a gift after the baby is born, I don't.

[Anonymous]

These thank you cards end up in the trash, don't they? I mean really, do you all keep these cards in boxes?

What's wrong with saying thank you when you receive a gift, making a call or sending a heartfelt email?

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks for the comments. Regarding directly above - yes, I do throw thank-you notes that I receive into the recycling bin after reading them. However, I do appreciate the effort that the recipient put forth to write and mail a few words of thanks. I don't expect that people keep the thank-you notes that I send to them, either - but I hope they recognize that this is my attempt to say, "Hey, I really appreciate that you went to the effort to give me this gift - I value your gift, and I wanted to let you know." Sure, this could be done via phone or email...but for some reason, the time and effort involved in buying a notecard, hand-writing a few words of thanks, addressing and stamping the envelope, and dropping it in the mail seems "better," for lack of a better word.

[Anonymous]

I send out thank you notes for birthday parties (kids), any huge milestone event (wedding shower, wedding, baby shower) and otherwise, if the spirit moves me. I do not send out thank you notes to family members at x-mas or for my own birthday, but always try to repay thanks in other ways (making a nice meal, phone calls, etc)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These thank you cards end up in the trash, don't they? I mean really, do you all keep these cards in boxes?

What's wrong with saying thank you when you receive a gift, making a call or sending a heartfelt email?

I posted before. If the person is there to say thank you to, of course that is a good time to say thank you. But my son has received money and gifts in the mail from relatives and friends and an email just seems too easy and tacky.

[Anonymous]

We send thank you notes for gifts from kids' birthday parties and gifts they receive in the mail, though we sometimes just call the grandparents. DH and I send notes for gifts unless we are are able to thank the givers in person, and sometimes we send notes anyway.

There's one family we're close with that doesn't seem to send notes for their kids' gifts but it's not a big deal as we usually find out they got the gifts. Only a couple other times have we not received thank you notes from kid parties. Sending thank yous seems to be the norm from what I can tell.

[Anonymous]

how about i havent received a thank you note from a baby shower i went to in november where the mom to be had us address our own envelope s!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:how about i havent received a thank you note from a baby shower i went to in november where the mom to be had us address our own envelope s!

Oh, wow, after a couple of margaritas this is too funny!

[Anonymous]

I try to send them, but I'll admit don't always if I have had the chance to thank the person face to face...and I appreciate receiving them, but I am not offended if I don't.

[Anonymous]

I send them, especially for something like a shower. I think it's pretty awful someone would attend a shower, get a bunch of gifts, and not send out thank you notes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My current thinking is that they are a complete waste of time. Hate sending them, hate getting them. straight in the trash. Lets all agree not to bother.

+1

I will call or email (usually call) to thank someone for a gift if they weren't there when I received it, but not since my wedding 5 years ago have I written and mailed a thank you note. I don't expect them from others and would rather they just call or email instead. Why do people place such a premium on a hand-written card? Seriously, it's beyond me.

[Anonymous]

Ok twin mamma could be busy. Hopefully bday kid is writing his own note.
Yes notes are still correct etiquette

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok twin mamma could be busy. Hopefully bday kid is writing his own note.
Yes notes are still correct etiquette

I'm a twin momma. You go home from the shower and write the notes right away. No excuse unless she popped those little guys out within a week after the shower, yo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:yes alwauys and not an e mail always hand written on proper stationary, folded note card for a female flat card for male

What?? I send thank you notes but I've never heard of such a rule. . .seems over the top to me.

[Anonymous]

Question, when writing thank you notes for a kids birthday party, if the kid is too young to write it themselves, do you write it for them as if they were writing it themselves or do you write it as the parent thanking the gift giver for the gift?