Adult Bulimia

[Anonymous]

I was bulimic for 17 years (I posted on this subject in the Health Forum) from 19-36. Talk therapy helped a great deal, as did EMDR and other mind/body therapies. However, what stopped the anxiety which led to the urges (or at least made them manageable) was a multi-drug cocktail. I did rEEG (reference EEG) to determine which drugs would work for me (before rEEG, I tried many different types with little to no affect). rEEG is used at the Renfrew Centers and a few local psychiatrists. OP, if you had asked me when I was 35 if beating bulimia was even possible, I would have answered with a resounding no! But it is possible. For me, it was only possible with a combo of drugs and talk therapy. There are many ways out of this hell, it just may take some time to find yours. Good luck. Don't give up.

[Anonymous]

Dear OP,

I struggled with anorexia and bulimia from 16-22. While I have to be sure that I don't over-think my weight (get too caught up in being too thin, gaining a few pounds, etc.,) I am recovered. It took LOTS of therapy, a couple of hospitalizations (less frequent now than in the '80's when I dealt with this) and some medication -- we did not have SSRI's in the same ways we do now so Wellbutrin (now a great option for bulimia) wasn't a choice. I then have had to have therapy to "grieve" what I lost; it is still sad when I realize how much of my life I devoted to destructive behaviors that nearly killed me and that totally wrecked my family at points. I have not disclosed this part of my background to friends and colleagues since I left graduate school; as the mother of a young girl, however, I now struggle with wondering when to share the story with her (if to share the story) and more significantly, when/whether to share it with others as an inspiration to say you *can* conquer the demons; you *can* beat it; you *can* reclaim your life; you *can* find ways to define yourself and your relationships that do not involve body image and food.

There are some very good therapists in Bethesda/Chevy Chase. If you are interested I can private message you those names.

My strongest advice to you: get into therapy. Accept that short-term medication may be necessary to help you clear some of the cobwebs that are preventing you from grappling with the issues at the root of the behavior (and also, remember that at this point you are overcoming addiction and "hardwiring" of cognitive function so it will take time). Realize that you truly are a beautiful person and that yes, while you have lost time to a disease that has come to define you, you can reclaim yourself and your life. I know you don't want to live like this. I really do. I also know how hard it is to let go of the disease (and I realize that those who have never struggled with it won't understand why I say that). If your spouse/partner does not know, find the courage to share it with him/her (you will need therapeutic support before doing so -- it's scary, I know). Take deep breaths and find ways to distract and affirm yourself while you are transitioning to your new life. (I had to do crazy things like paint my nails while I was in a bath in the bathtub because that meant I was "trapped" and unable to move for an hour so as not to mess up my nails and that got me through some of the cravings -- again, people who have never struggled with the addiction will have no idea what I'm talking about but trust me, bulimia and anorexia have so much to do with perceptions about appearances that not messing up a manicure comes to matter in bigger than life ways). Finally, if you can find a good support group moderated by a trained therapist, do it (too many become places to trade war stories). If you need help, come back here. DCUM has its moments, but it also can be helpful when it's supplemented by the right medical care for issues like this).

Good luck, OP. You can do this. I used to read "The Little Engine that Could" to my godchildren before I had my daughter. It was an emblem for me of how I overcame the diseases (although the children didn't know that). It can be your story, too.

[Anonymous]

Just wanted to say you're not alone, OP.

[Anonymous]

OP here: thank you all so much for sharing. Honestly, these responses have really made me feel less alone. I am glad I am not the only one out there going through this (and for SO many years), but I'm also sad that so many people do and have. Why do so many people suffer from bulimia?

At 22:08: would greatly appreciate it if you sent me some names of therapists. Email me at [e-mail] or put their names on here- thanks!

At 22:06: would you send me the name of who performed EMDR therapy on you? Or could you tell us how this therapy works and how it helped you?

At 20:23: I am so sorry this has happened. How actively were you bingeing and purging? Are you willing to share what kind of birth defect your child had?
I'm sure you did the best you could given the circumstances. There are people who use crack cocaine throughout their pregnancies and nothing ever happens to their babies. Bulima is tough disease and it is so incredibly hard to overcome. You're not alone out there. I appreciate you telling everyone so far about some of the ramifications.

[Anonymous]

Has anyone suffered from any adverse health effects as a result of bulimia?

[Anonymous]

I was the previous poster that mentioned that I believe I have done some damage to my heart as a result and I also think my teeth have suffered.

[Anonymous]

22:08 here -- Ann Jacob Smith and Dr. David Trachtenberg are awesome.

You are too, OP. Hang in there --

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone suffered from any adverse health effects as a result of bulimia?

I was the first poster to respond. I have had to have five root canals.

[Anonymous]

Op, i also recommend Michelle Market. Her website is www.michellemarket.com. She is in herndon, but has Sunday hours.

[Anonymous]

As a result of laxative abuse, I have IBS and pretty miserable GI issues. My fertility was not compromised as far as I can tell -- although I was DX infertile it was because of other issues -- but that is another common issue.

[Anonymous]

I am recovering at age 29. I was prebulimic in highschool - chewing and spitting out, avoiding foods, binging. In college I would binge and purge and then not eat. I got extremely thin but gradually got much more balance toward my senior year. First 3 years out of college I was a 4x a day purger... I could throw up on command, without too much stomach acid/other issues. Once I met my DH and we moved in I stopped almost cold turkey. Still purge maybe once a week but only when I am alone and only after over eating (v. binging). When I was pregnant I did not purge or have the desire to even after binging. So far no health issues. Ive never done therapy but I am at peace with how far I have come. I wish you the best. You are not alone.