If we live in Arlington, but our kids go to NW DC schools, will we ever feel included?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have come to the conclusion that the DC/MD posters on this board don't want the competition that Virginia kids mean, so they discourage parents from looking at "their" schools - never mind if our commute to those schools is 10-15 minutes. So they act as if Virginia is the hinterlands, as if the commute alone will kill our children. Then they insult us personally ("climbers"?) to further push us away.

Transparent, really.

I am 11:13. I live in MD and frankly could care less where anyone is fm.ro I hope you are kidding but if you are not, please don't insult us. There are definite considerations for people from VA attending schools in MD or DC just like there would be if I chose to go to school in VA. Traffic is really bad and getting around is just not that easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in Arlington (which we love), but our kids go to schools in NW DC (and my DH works in DC, I'm currently not working). If we can handle the commute, should we still move because of problems fitting into a particular community? Most Arlington kids go to Arlington public schools, so our kids are left out of the neighborhood social scene. Our DC friends are lovely, but I have to make the drive back and forth so others aren't detered by their fear of crossing into VA. Is this doable through high school (my oldest is 9)? Or is it inevitable that we'll move to DC for social and logistical considerations? Are there any of you out there who tried to make it work but ended up moving into DC? Anyone out there who has stuck it out and found it not so bad?

I think it will probably take some time and energy on your part, but since you are starting at the elementary school level, I think your family will have the opportunity to make this work.


I live deeper into the VA burbs than you do and we started at the high school level and socially it has not worked well for my child. Academically it has been a nice fit, but at the high school level the cliques are already formed and sealed. Consequently, my child found people who she is "friendly with", but no new friends at her school. And despite attending a progressive school, she was made fun of by some for living in Virginia (she actually found that part a bit amusing). All of this said, she does not at all regret the decision to transfer to this school.

[Anonymous]

I am laughing at the idea I am a "climber"--I am also laughing about the commute..mine is about 15 minutes and it's a heck of a lot closer than some of my friends who live in MD who go to the same school. As for the social aspect.sorry..at Potomac..a lot of kids are coming in from all areas so even though it's a VA school..your kid from VA could still have a group of friends from the District or Maryland. I am not buying into this. I also think there is a push to keep VA people out of District schools and it really bothers me. The reality is that there are not so many private school options in VA--there is Langley (which many of you make fun of for not being a "great" school. and it's just to eigth grade.whatever..I think it's good, and Potomac--Flynt Hill is so far out..that is really far if you live in Arlington so going to DC or MD makes sense and should make sense if you are not going with public. For many years the publics were okay but now with higher class sizes, many families are looking for a better place. I am doing certain sport leagues in our town and my kids play with neighbors (many go to a variety of schools, DC private, VA private, public, Catholic, etc etc.)--it all works out. In a nutshell OP..find the right school for your child and go with it--remember that DCUM trends to DC/MD people so a couple of jerks shouldn't bother you.

[Anonymous]

I'm not a parent, but all of the answers here seem a little crazy to me. My sister's best friend at her DC private school was from Arlington. They met in their first year (7th grade), formed an instant bond, and remain friends today, two years out of college. We were born and raised in DC, the friend born and raised in Arlington. Despite the fact that my sister came to the school with pre-existing friends from our public elementary school, there were zero problems integrating the new VA friend into their crew. In fact, sis and BFF were some of the most "popular" and well-liked girls at the school (although this was a pretty unique school with pretty much no clique problem and a really good, friendly vibe - not so much like that anymore, I hear). There were zero distinctions between MD, VA, and DC kids (except for the occasional bit of snobbery - which I'll fully admit to - from the DC kids about "really being from DC") as far as the social scene went, and driving went both ways pretty equally.

I have no idea why the one parent said she wouldn't let her kid drive over Chain Bridge after dark - been doing it since I was 16 and never had a problem.

So I think it really depends - on your kid, on the school, on the other kids at the school. I don't see any reason why living in Arlington per se would cause your kid to be a social outcast.