Do independent school families live in condos?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:some people's condos are nicer than others' houses.

condo does not equal "worse" or "less" or "poor." and some people's big houses are unclean. or not furnished because they can't afford furniture after spending so much on a house. or some people have a fancy car that might make one assume that they also have a fancy house... but in reality they spend a lot on the car but live in a very modest house.

i really wouldn't worry too much. if you and your family keep a clean, comfortable house and are welcoming you will be just fine - and light years ahead of those with a bigger, unclean house or, conversely, a big house that is like a museum where the kids can't even play.

i speak from experience on both sides of the fence.

do you really judge people based on how clean their houses are??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We will be sending our dd to private school and live in an apartment. I think we usually get a pass because we are a very young couple living in the city, in an area with mostly older (and much wealthier) parents, but it really hasn't been an issue. At some time or another, we've had her entire preschool class (with their parents) over our place and no one cares!!! We do have it nicely decorated and I take are of it pretty well, but I hope that's not a consideration! (Our apartment is the same size as a small house in the area) We love living in the city and think about it - it's nothing new to the vast majority of urban children! I have friends from NYC who laugh at the thought of anyone being made fun of for not owning a huge house - they ALL grew up in apartments.

I do agree that the high school years are tough when they start coveting $200 jeans and $500 purses, but that's quite a bit away for your family - so I wouldn't worry now.

There are SO many positives to living in the city in a small space! I have on average an extra 1.5-2 hrs/day MORE with my family because of no commute, we have no extra crap - it really cuts down on consumer/materialism, we are a closer family because of proximity (and also the aforementioned time from lack of commute), we exercise more together (post dinner walks in the neighborhood - we live next to Rock Creek).

You'll be fine.

Not the OP or a PP, but I just love this response and had to say so!

[Anonymous]

I, too, love 9:47's post. And to OP, here's a thought: start thinking of yourself and your family as much cooler/ hipper than families that live in the 'burbs, because you will be! Remember that the broad yards of McLean and Potomac generally equate with narrow minds. If you position this correctly, your child could be the envy of all of his/ her classmates by truly living "in the city." (My DH loves to correct "suburban" types when they say that they are from DC, and aren't. Being from Springfield or Bethesda is not being "from DC.")

Besides, your condo building may have an elevator, or a pool, or be near the metro, or walking distance to great restaurants! Very exciting for kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I, too, love 9:47's post. And to OP, here's a thought: start thinking of yourself and your family as much cooler/ hipper than families that live in the 'burbs, because you will be! Remember that the broad yards of McLean and Potomac generally equate with narrow minds. If you position this correctly, your child could be the envy of all of his/ her classmates by truly living "in the city." (My DH loves to correct "suburban" types when they say that they are from DC, and aren't. Being from Springfield or Bethesda is not being "from DC.")

Besides, your condo building may have an elevator, or a pool, or be near the metro, or walking distance to great restaurants! Very exciting for kids.

Wow, you think that because people live in Bethesda or McLean, they are narrow minded??!! I think your generalization that those who live in the city are "cooler and hipper" than those who live in the "burbs" is pretty narrow minded and just the type of thinking that the OP sounds like she is trying to avoid!!

[Anonymous]

I was wondering when the "hipper than thou" refrain would raise its ugly head on this thread. OP, 12:25 sounds rather obnoxious and if you follow her guidance you're setting yourself and your child up for rejection. Please, just be comfortable with your own situation and choices and don't resort to "positioning this correctly," or whatever she called it. (Besides, she should realize your DD is going to have many, many classmates who live in the District.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was wondering when the "hipper than thou" refrain would raise its ugly head on this thread. OP, 12:25 sounds rather obnoxious and if you follow her guidance you're setting yourself and your child up for rejection. Please, just be comfortable with your own situation and choices and don't resort to "positioning this correctly," or whatever she called it. (Besides, she should realize your DD is going to have many, many classmates who live in the District.)

Are you the one that keeps calling anyone whose opinion differs from yours obnoxious? That word just keeps surfacing on multiple threads, and is getting rather old and juvenile.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I, too, love 9:47's post. And to OP, here's a thought: start thinking of yourself and your family as much cooler/ hipper than families that live in the 'burbs, because you will be! Remember that the broad yards of McLean and Potomac generally equate with narrow minds. If you position this correctly, your child could be the envy of all of his/ her classmates by truly living "in the city." (My DH loves to correct "suburban" types when they say that they are from DC, and aren't. Being from Springfield or Bethesda is not being "from DC.")

Besides, your condo building may have an elevator, or a pool, or be near the metro, or walking distance to great restaurants! Very exciting for kids.

One of the great things about DC is that you can live in a house in the middle of the city (unlike most of NYC for example). So I don't know where this McLean/Potomac/Bethesda stuff is coming from. And, I'm sorry, but I have to laugh at the idea that anywhere in DC is particularly cool or hip...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I, too, love 9:47's post. And to OP, here's a thought: start thinking of yourself and your family as much cooler/ hipper than families that live in the 'burbs, because you will be! Remember that the broad yards of McLean and Potomac generally equate with narrow minds. If you position this correctly, your child could be the envy of all of his/ her classmates by truly living "in the city." (My DH loves to correct "suburban" types when they say that they are from DC, and aren't. Being from Springfield or Bethesda is not being "from DC.")

Besides, your condo building may have an elevator, or a pool, or be near the metro, or walking distance to great restaurants! Very exciting for kids.

One of the great things about DC is that you can live in a house in the middle of the city (unlike most of NYC for example). So I don't know where this McLean/Potomac/Bethesda stuff is coming from. And, I'm sorry, but I have to laugh at the idea that anywhere in DC is particularly cool or hip...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was wondering when the "hipper than thou" refrain would raise its ugly head on this thread. OP, 12:25 sounds rather obnoxious and if you follow her guidance you're setting yourself and your child up for rejection. Please, just be comfortable with your own situation and choices and don't resort to "positioning this correctly," or whatever she called it. (Besides, she should realize your DD is going to have many, many classmates who live in the District.)

Are you the one that keeps calling anyone whose opinion differs from yours obnoxious? That word just keeps surfacing on multiple threads, and is getting rather old and juvenile.

Nope. Just used it this one time!

[Anonymous]

So the bottom line I take from reading all these posts, including the "obnoxious" ones (hee hee), is that if YOU are fine with where you live, your child will be too! No matter where you go, there will be people who are richer, smarter, or whatever. So what? Time to teach your child that just being yourself is okay ... unless that means being insecure, of course.

[Anonymous]

PP Great way to summmarize the entire thread

[Anonymous]

Typo - PP Great way to summarize the entire thread

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We too were faced with not wanting our kid to be perceived as "poor" which for most of these schools means making less than $300,000 a year! It's very true that love, integrity, family, and all those other wonderful values are much more important than money, and we all strive to teach that to our children everyday through word and deeds. Nonetheless, I found myself being a bit more thoughtful about how I dressed when on campus, how my child was dressed, and the name brands of the snack foods I provided when it was my turn to bring in food. I realize this must sound so ridiculous to some, but I decided that paying attention to a few small details here and there, in addition to modeling our values, was a small way to help ease my child's early years at school. Having been embarassed by my own parents in elementary school (for reasons not related to income!), I am more careful myself!!

OP: Your question was not at all silly. I want to reassure you that once the kids in the class have bonded, after the first two years, they are such good friends that they no longer pay much attention to material wealth. They just know that they like their classmates and enjoy their company ... giggling in the bedroom of a condo is just as much fun as in the bedroom of a mansion!!

13:55 and OP:

We're in the same boat! Fancy school. Not so fancy income. Great point about the kids bonding after a short time, notwithstanding material wealth (or lacke therof). So true. Maybe there is hope for a better world after all.

[Anonymous]

i know several in my neighborhood that are either renting or own condos and they attend some of the most prestigious schools (preschools)

[Anonymous]

We've put two kids through about the most expensive private school in the District, while living in a condo. If we hadn't lived in a condo, I doubt we could have afforded it.

I remember the first time we brought one of our older son's friends over for a playdate. This child lived in a very large house in a very desirable neighborhood in the District, with a huge yard, etc. As we pulled into the parking lot of our condo, he turned to our son and exclaimed: "Wow! Do you live in a hotel? That is so cool! It's just like "The Suite Life!" [a sort of modern day Eloise on the Disney Channel about two boys who live in a hotel.]

Bottom line: your kids' classmates won't care, and I suspect many parents will be jealous about your having no lawn to mow, no roof to replace, etc. Although there are times when I wish we had a backyard, so I could fling the door open and shoo both boys outside when they are climbing the walls, I never seriously regretted not having a house, and I doubt they have, either.

That being said, I will have one serious concern when the reach high school: ours will never be the home where the kids hang out, because we'll always be right on top of them. For a parent like me, who prefers to know who is kids are hanging out with and where they are, this will be a challenge. But I suspect we'll manage it. In any case, it sounds like that situation is still a long way off for you.