Anyone have a 3rd and regret it?

[Anonymous]

We have 3 and we're on the fence about having a 4th. The 3rd is 6 months old right now, and he is super cute and super easy. I keep telling everyone how easy he is, and the usual response is, "You're just more relaxed now so it's easier." Maybe. All I know is that it isn't as difficult as we thought it would be (and I am a working mom juggling a lot).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 3 and we're on the fence about having a 4th. The 3rd is 6 months old right now, and he is super cute and super easy. I keep telling everyone how easy he is, and the usual response is, "You're just more relaxed now so it's easier." Maybe. All I know is that it isn't as difficult as we thought it would be (and I am a working mom juggling a lot).

You're awesome. Happy Mother's Day!

[Anonymous]

I am currently pregnant with #3. I had my first two close together and I was still pretty young. Now that they are 6 and 4 we decided to have just one more. My first 2 have special needs so there is a chance that #3 might as well. We adapted well to our kids needs and they are both looking forward to having a sibling

I am planning on not regretting it. As hard as raising the two I have at times was, I have never regretted having either of them at all.

[Anonymous]

cuzimawesome wrote:Not regret. It's just harder. You need to be willing to be outnumbered. Two wasn't that bad, it was adding #3 that was the challenge. My first two have very different personalities from each other, therefore they have VERY different needs. Add on an infant, and I'm being pulled in every direction. Luckily I have an amazing husband. When he comes home from work, he dives right into being a dad.

The cool thing about #3 is that I'm way more relaxed. I'm more confident in my parenting abilities and it's not as nerve wracking as dealing with the first two. I'm truly, truly enjoying my LOs babyness this time... because I'm more relaxed.

But yeah... it IS harder. And there are some nights when I want to pull my hair out and scream. But overall, no regrets! Just be prepared to have a fuller life.

Good luck with whatever decision you make!

I just had a second and I am WAY more relaxed with #2. She is a super mellow, easy baby (knock on wood!) and I think it has a lot to do with how much more relaxed (or distracted by #1!!) I am. That said, there is no way we are having a third.

[Anonymous]

We were planning on 3 (in three years) and when the third was 6 months old I found out I was pregnant again. It was a complete shock considering all the precautions we had taken to NOT have a fourth child. I have to say that my DC4 really does complete the family. I didn't know that was what we as a family needed and had a hard time connecting with the pregnancy. I was 16 wks when I finally figured it out, but I have to admit that I can't imagine our lives any differently. I do think that the change from having no children to having one is really big. Then going from 1 to two can be a challenge but after that it isn't so hard. You life is already about kids so adding a few more in doesn't make a huge impact.

Plus we have a spare..... or two! I jest.

[Anonymous]

Such a disgusting post. Think of how your child will feel knowing that you regretted having him or her. Really repulsive topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are on the fence regarding having a third. I was wondering how much harder is it really and honestly anyone who was on the fence and did it, do you ever regret it?

Depends on the age intervals - if you're talking about 3 kids under age 5 that can be more stressful than, say, having a 7 year old, 5 year old, and newborn.

[Anonymous]

Three is too much - just watch Supernanny!! It's always three!

[Anonymous]

It seems like most families we encounter have 3 or more kids these days, and everyone seems happy to me. FWIW, we live in the Olney/Brookeville area --- where 3 or more seems to be the norm. We used to live in Silver Spring where 2 seemed to be the norm.

[Anonymous]

We are done with 2. We do not have age, fertility, or financial worries and we are still done. We love our girls to pieces but we know our limits and this is it.

We knew we were done before #2 was even born, but as it turns out DD2 has not been an easy baby, even though everyone said she would be. She had terrible reflux, gas, and fussiness, hates her carseat and has to be held constantly. I love her, and don't regret her one bit, but just wanted to point out that the "next" child is not always mellow.

[Anonymous]

FWIW, I don't think there is a single person that would ever say they would regret having a child after it is here.

Once you have the kid and know him/her...saying you regret it is akin to saying you wish the child never existed.

These type of ?'s always bother me.

I think ppl will say it made their lives more complicated or added stress to a fragile marriage or made it difficult to spend individual time or to cart three different kids to three different overlapping sporting events in the same afternoon...but saying they 'regret having the child' is another can of worms.

Hopefully, nobody ever regrets having any one of their children.

[Anonymous]

PP, my mother told me every day that she wished I wasn’t born because I was supposed to be a boy (after 2 girls). Yes there are a lot of mean parents out there.
OP, my advice, if you’re having a 3rd to try for a specific sex, think how you will react if you’re disappointed. I'm sure, not as mean as my mother however, all of the kids in a family know if a 3rd kid happened because the parents wanted a specific sex.

[cuzimawesome]

Anonymous wrote:FWIW, I don't think there is a single person that would ever say they would regret having a child after it is here.

Once you have the kid and know him/her...saying you regret it is akin to saying you wish the child never existed.

These type of ?'s always bother me.

I think ppl will say it made their lives more complicated or added stress to a fragile marriage or made it difficult to spend individual time or to cart three different kids to three different overlapping sporting events in the same afternoon...but saying they 'regret having the child' is another can of worms.

Hopefully, nobody ever regrets having any one of their children.

So very true. "Regret" is definitely the wrong word to use. I never ever regretted having any of my children. Life is a bit more difficult at times... but my babies are definitely worth all the hard work.

And I guess I should mention that they're not all babies. My two older children are in elementary school... which makes my life easier with an infant. I couldn't imagine having three kids under the age of four like my mom did. If you're gonna have more than two, I strongly suggest you span them out... I think it makes a world of difference. Unless of course you're the type of person who can handle kids so close in age. Some people can do it. I couldn't... and having kids so close in age was really hard on my mom. She suffered from severe PPD and was in and out of psych units throughout my childhood. So yeah... you gotta weigh all the pros and cons.

[Anonymous]

I got pregnant with the third by accident. We adore him so much. Honestly I don't think any normal person would ever regret any child they had. They are a true blessing. Also if two of them are not getting along, they have a third to play with. It is challenging but oh so worth it.