Looking for a synagogue

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Adas is very kid-friendly. The main rabbi is fairly young, has only been there a couple of years, and seems relatively socially progressive. You might consider talking with him as well as attending a couple of services. He gave a sermon last year or the year before on welcoming interfaith families, and while that is obviously a religious not a social issue, to me it indicated that he is interested in outreach to various groups - so my guess is he would be receptive and welcoming.

We don't have kids yet but I've heard the Adas pre-school is great.

I know it wasn't intended that way, but my husband and I are both Jewish from birth. Gay marriage is expressly permitted by the conservative movement and has been for some years. Interfaith marriage is not condoned by the conservative movement. It really is not the same thing at all. While I have no objection to interfaith marriage on a philosophical level I must say that we would probably not be happy with a synagogue that was particularly receptive of it.

[Anonymous]

Wow, PP. How can you have no philosophical objection to interfaith marriage, yet you wouldn't be happy if a synagogue was receptive of it? Sounds like you are trying to sound less judgmental than you really are. And your comment about "Jewish from birth" further shows your snobbiness. I am cringing and hope we never cross paths!

[Anonymous]

Interfaith marriage and the Conservative movement: If anyone feels this is a stumbling block to membership, I urge you to "shop" and to make appointments with the local rabbis of many of the shuls discussed. You might be pleasantly surprised.

I am in an interfaith marriage, and I am in a warm and welcoming Conservative congregation. No, the rabbi will not perform interfaith weddings (as well he shouldn't), but the rabbi will welcome the whole family into the community fully and completely.

[Anonymous]

But why would you want to be part of a community of which you know your own marriage wouldn't have been welcomed? I know that sounds confrontational but I truly don't get it. I will say that as a child of an interfaith marriage, who was raised Jewish, i have often been made to feel unwelcome or "not Jewish enough" by many conservative Jews, including some who are good friends. They just don't view a child born to interfaith parents, even when the mother is Jewish and the child is raised Jewish, as the same, dare I say "as good," as those born to two Jewish parents.

[Anonymous]

Can I ask whether conservative synagogues are accepting of those who were not born Jewish but converted?

[Anonymous]

Temple Beth Ami in Rockville is reform but feels very conservative, and the rabbi doesn't do interfaith marriages but everyone is welcome. The cantor is gay and the new rabbi is a woman. We love it there! I know it's not in DC proper, but for others who may be searching it's a good option.

[Anonymous]

A local Reform rabbi was not allowed by his congregation to perform my interfaith marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A local Reform rabbi was not allowed by his congregation to perform my interfaith marriage.

I *believe* the central Reform people decided to leave it to the individual conscience of the Rabbi and sensibilities of the congregation.

[Anonymous]

The refusal to accept interfaith marriage seems unreasonably intolerant to me. Makes me sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Adas is very kid-friendly. The main rabbi is fairly young, has only been there a couple of years, and seems relatively socially progressive. You might consider talking with him as well as attending a couple of services. He gave a sermon last year or the year before on welcoming interfaith families, and while that is obviously a religious not a social issue, to me it indicated that he is interested in outreach to various groups - so my guess is he would be receptive and welcoming.

We don't have kids yet but I've heard the Adas pre-school is great.

I know it wasn't intended that way, but my husband and I are both Jewish from birth. Gay marriage is expressly permitted by the conservative movement and has been for some years. Interfaith marriage is not condoned by the conservative movement. It really is not the same thing at all. While I have no objection to interfaith marriage on a philosophical level I must say that we would probably not be happy with a synagogue that was particularly receptive of it.

I'm one of the posters who noted Etz Hayim. Please don't consider it. It is a warm and welcoming and open community and all families and individuals are accepted. It is heartbreaking to hear that you would not want to attend a synagogue that welcomed all families. Heartbreaking and ironic. You are posting on here looking for a community that will accept you and the one you chose to love. Please at least consider doing the same. And as an aside - it was only in 2006 that conservative judaism's opinion on this changed at all, and it changed only to allow individual congregational rabbis to make their own decisions on the matter. So no - gay marriage is not "expressly permitted by the conservative movement and has been for some years."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But why would you want to be part of a community of which you know your own marriage wouldn't have been welcomed? I know that sounds confrontational but I truly don't get it. I will say that as a child of an interfaith marriage, who was raised Jewish, i have often been made to feel unwelcome or "not Jewish enough" by many conservative Jews, including some who are good friends. They just don't view a child born to interfaith parents, even when the mother is Jewish and the child is raised Jewish, as the same, dare I say "as good," as those born to two Jewish parents.

This is one of the dumbest things I've read in quite some time. According to JUDAISM if your Mother is Jewish so are you. End of story. I don't know what "community" you lived in but the one I lived and live in welcomes people who want to worship in our temple and be a part of our Jewish community. And both my parents are Jewish. Good grief.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask whether conservative synagogues are accepting of those who were not born Jewish but converted?

Yes, they absolutely are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I'm one of the posters who noted Etz Hayim. Please don't consider it. It is a warm and welcoming and open community and all families and individuals are accepted. It is heartbreaking to hear that you would not want to attend a synagogue that welcomed all families. Heartbreaking and ironic. You are posting on here looking for a community that will accept you and the one you chose to love. Please at least consider doing the same. And as an aside - it was only in 2006 that conservative judaism's opinion on this changed at all, and it changed only to allow individual congregational rabbis to make their own decisions on the matter. So no - gay marriage is not "expressly permitted by the conservative movement and has been for some years."

Great post.

[Anonymous]

I would say, pick a place that you can afford. Just phone around and ask what they charge, then pick the one you can afford and that is near by.
You do not need to mingle with the congregants. You are 2 gay men. You already have your social circle and need a congregation for other reasons

[Anonymous]

accepting interfaith marriage and performing the ceremony are totally different things. I didn't marry a Jew, and I didn't have a Jewish wedding. You actually don't need to be married by a rabbi, anyway. My husband, who feels like I do, didn't want a Jewish wedding because that would be dishonest. My synagogue accepts me, and my family and we are all happy. No one cares that I had a civil wedding, and no one cares that my son has a non-Jewish parent.

BACK TO TOPIC:
Yes, the Conservative synagogues are accepting the converted.

Note that accepting the interfaith couples doesn't mean allowing the non-Jewish partners to lead prayers.

I think that if you try and find a place that is gay-friendly with no acceptance of interfaith couples within the community, you'd do best to form your own minyan. But then you won't have a preschool.